


A Tangled Web

by PoeticAnt44, Vokunkendov



Series: Children of Daedra [2]
Category: Elder Scrolls, Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: Abandonment, Assassination, Beating, Betrayal, Character Death, Dark Brotherhood Questline, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort, Lies, Love, Love Confessions, Magic, Murder, Nightmares, No Dovahkiin | Dragonborn, Partner Betrayal, Poverty, Prison, Prison Escape, Prostitution, Rape/Non-con Elements, Realms of Oblivion, Romance, Sex Work, Skooma (Elder Scrolls), Spiders, Spiral Skein, Treachery, Visions, cidhna mine, webs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-09-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:21:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 70,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25759513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoeticAnt44/pseuds/PoeticAnt44, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vokunkendov/pseuds/Vokunkendov
Summary: Mephala likes to toy with those she deems interesting enough, plucking strings of fate like the spiderwebs that fill her plane of Oblivion.  We say ‘she,’ but is that who Mephala is?  No one knows for certain, changing who she is as she spins her lies.  What is known is she is a liar, deceiver, keeper of secrets.  She spins her webs of fate from the small farmer to the heads of state.  The Daedric Prince tires of the games, wishing for more, showing herself as a man, the desire for a child to help thread her world as she deems fit.Marianne, the child of Mephala and Jodis, life destroyed by betrayal and death.  After being found by Nazir, Mari follows the man to her new home, her new world with the Dark Brotherhood where she forms an unbreaking bond with the Redguard, who trains her for survival, eventually leading to love.  Together they fight corruption and betrayal within their little family, not knowing there are darker forces at play.
Relationships: Nazir (Elder Scrolls)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Children of Daedra [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776904
Comments: 94
Kudos: 46





	1. Along Came a Spider - Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Nazir needs some love!
> 
> This is the second installment of [Children of Daedra](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776904) by me and Volkunkendov. It takes place before the events of the Dragonborn and is a bit darker, harsher, than the last one about Nocturnal’s Daughter. Mephala and the Dark Brotherhood are rooted in darkness and the story reflects that. There will be quite a few triggers, so please be sure you read all the tags. Despite that, there is quite a bit of happiness in it as well. We can't make it all doom and gloom.
> 
> Nazir is the love interest here. It is time he gets the love he deserves. Not many stories are written about him, except for smut one-shots. When people write about the Dark Brotherhood, it’s always Cicero that gains the spotlight. I wanted to give him more as I found him interesting, but disappointing as he’s not marriageable in the game. We hope you like him as much as we did writing him.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is mainly the prologue and how Mephala enters the picture.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Rape/Non-Con

The man stomped the snow off his boots when he came into the house, greeted with wonderful aromas. A smile played on his lips, mouth salivating with the thoughts of delicious food for dinner, chuckling at his rumbling stomach indicating his hunger. Soren snuck into the kitchen area watching his wife busy herself with their meal for the evening, distracted, not hearing him come in. Her honey blonde hair falling out of her braided bun hard at work as she absently pushed them out of her eyes and wiped the sweat off her brow with the back of a hand. He loved to watch his wife work, cooking, always making sure he was properly fed. The years of wholesome cooking had added on the pounds to his stomach, expanding his girth, and hers as well, but it didn’t change how he felt about her or how beautiful she was, even after eleven years of marriage.

Making sure she had no sharp objects in her hands while she was distracted, Soren snuck up on her and tickled her, her laughter a combination of humor and fright. It was deep and throaty, so unlike her resonant voice.

“Damn you, Soren! Your antics are going to give me a heart attack one day!” Jodis scolded, but still giggling. She turned around to face her husband, grabbed his face with two hands and pulled him in for a small but tender kiss. 

Soren wrapped his arms around his wife’s plump waist, kissing her again. “You need to pay more attention, my dear.”

“I’m too busy cooking for you,” she said, shooing him out of her kitchen. “Now go before you end up with a cold dinner.” Jodis turned to resume her stirring of the stew, laughing again as her husband nibbled on her neck.

“Out!” she yelled, chuckling, not really minding his teases and affections. It was what kept their relationship strong.

“I’m going..I’m going.”

Soren removed his boots, poured himself a glass of wine and sat down at the dinner table to wait on dinner, listening to his wife hum a tune as she finished cooking. Life was good, he thought. He had known Jodis all his life as they grew up in the same village, never dreaming she would ever be his wife when they were younger. After they married, they started a farm that had become quite profitable, living a comfortable life. It helped that they both still loved each other. It was unusual in such a harsh environment like Skyrim where marriage was done out of necessity rather than love, and for that he would be forever grateful. 

The only drawback of their happy marriage was the fact that Jordis had been unable to conceive children. Soren didn’t know if it was because he was barren or she was. They had tried to see healers, prayed to Mara and Arkay, took alchemical recipes, but it just wasn’t meant to be. Recently, they had been talking about adoption, seriously considering taking care of an unwanted child, but they hadn’t yet reached a decision.

Soren poured his wife some wine as she came in with two steaming bowls of stew with freshly baked bread. “I have some snowberry crostatas baking and will be ready after dinner,” she informed him. 

“You’re too good to me, wife.”

Jodis kissed her husband on the forehead and sat down to eat dinner, “And you are good to me.”

“Have you thought more about the adoption thing we had been talking about?” he asked when they started eating. 

The lack of children was a sore spot for them both, but especially for Jodis, who was made for motherhood. It took her some time to decide, feeling like she was giving up on her body. “Yes, I have...quite a bit actually,” she replied, nodding.

“And?”

“Let’s do it, Soren. Let’s go get us a child who needs a home. I would rather have a baby of our own, but it seems the Gods have decided it was not meant to be for us. Let’s give a little one a home and some happiness.”

“Excellent! I will arrange a trip in the next month for us to go to Riften and take a look at the children at Honorhall. We need to make sure the fields are ready for the growing season before we head out.”

Jodis grabbed her husband's hand, smiling, suddenly excited about the prospect, that their discussions were finally going to be a reality.

Jodis had made love to her husband that evening, feeling their bond renew with the idea of finally completing their family. She dozed off with imaginings of what life would be like with a little girl or boy, a child she could teach things to and love. Soren was snuggled in behind her, a heavy arm draped over her body, snoring lightly on her neck. His smells and sounds, bringing a comfort like a warm, soft blanket as she fell asleep.

She came in the night seeking warmth from the Winter chill, to make a new home. She chose a dark corner near the floor and spun her web to ensnare tasty treats before she laid her eggs. The little spider spun her intricate design in her usual geometric pattern forming a kaleidoscope of shapes and lines. Each touch of her web would alert her towards her next meal, the slight vibrations would feel like an earthquake to the little creature as she rushed out and encased the insect in a fine thread of silk to be sucked and savored later.

When the little spider completed her sticky new home, she sat motionless with infinite patience, waiting, her bejeweled eyes surveyed her new home, finally enjoying the warmth after her hard labor of web spinning. Little did the spider know that a new creature would invade her tiny little mind, use her like an eight-legged puppet to observe the two humans. 

Mephala had been searching for prey to play with, increasingly dissatisfied with those she found recently. She cast her toys aside like a petulant child seeking new fun. The Daedric Prince had been searching far and wide for the perfect woman, a vessel for her latest game, a plaything to manipulate for her own enjoyment and humor. The blonde Nord woman and her dark-haired mate were perfect, she thought as she invaded the little spider that managed to sneak into their home. Mephala observed their happiness, laughter, kisses, and love-making. The couple was nearly perfect, their marriage a happy one, and one that she was eager to destroy for her own amusement. But her schemes were grander than just ruining the lives of two people. The Daedric Prince curled up on her web and bided her time, waiting for the perfect opportunity.

Soren gave his wife a long kiss goodbye. He had to leave for Windhelm for several days to sell their produce to the vendors of the area and make some arrangements with the nobles of the area. Their crops, grown in fertile soil, had the people eager in two Holds of Eastmarch and Riften for their crops. The previous Spring and Summer had been bountiful, and a new growing season was soon approaching as they were running out of food, the Winter long.

Loading up their horse and wagon, he gave the mare a light whip to get her moving, waving goodbye to his wife, hauling his load to the great Nord city. It was a trip he had made countless times, neither worried with familiarity.

Jodis waved goodbye to her husband, blew him a kiss when he looked back and she sat on their porch watching him until she could see him no longer. He was a mere speck in the Wintery landscape as he crested the hill and then there was no sight of him. Sighing with a chill coursing through her, she wrapped herself in her shawl and headed back into the warm house to clean. There was a book she hadn’t had a chance to read yet and with Soren gone, it would give her some time to delve into it, looking forward to propping up her feet by the fire, sipping some wine as she read.

Despite having some free time to herself, she hated when Soren left. She always worried about him being killed by bandits or other creatures out there, despite him traveling countless times. He was a capable man, but she still fretted for him. Jodis also missed him terribly. He was such a good man and treated her well, knowing how lucky she was. Not all women who married fared as well as she did.

As she was sweeping the wooden floors of dust and dirt, she thought about the adoption. She couldn’t decide if she wanted a boy or a girl. She supposed it would depend on the child and she hoped she would know when she got to know the children, that feeling she knew was the one for them. Jodis knew the most difficult part would be choosing only one child. It would be horrible to leave the other children behind, but in the end, she and Soren were just too busy for more than one child. Perhaps as they hired more farmhands, they would have more time for more children.

The excitement of starting a family soared in her heart as she started to sing and dance around while cleaning, her heart brimming with happiness.

The little spider had laid her eggs, had food bundled, waiting for her hatchlings to feed on. Now that she was done, Mephala took over the little mother once more, climbing down from her sticky home. If anything, the Daedric Prince took care of her spiderlings. The change that took over mama spider would have shocked anyone who witnessed it as she grew in size. The spider didn’t just change in size, but shape-shifted into what appeared to be a male figure. Four limbs receded into pale flesh as the rest morphed into two arms and two legs. Fine hairs that once covered the creature soon turned to smooth human flesh. 

Now standing upright, the once hairy, multiple-eye face slowly changed revealing a handsome male one of youthful appearance, a dusting of masculine whiskers on the chin, eyes, and hair black as a moonless night. The Daedric Prince was not one who chose sex or gender. Many referred to Mephala as a female, but the Prince chose what she wanted to be as Mepaha had completed into the desired shape, which was now a man.

Standing naked at the foot of the bed, Mephala stared at the sleeping Nord woman, lost in happy dreams. His penis erect, dripping, trembling in anticipation of what was to come. A wicked smile played on the man’s face as he crawled into bed with Jodis, hovering over the prone form. As he grazed his hands along her sleeping body, he cast a spell on her to keep her sedated yet slightly aware. It wouldn’t be fun if the woman wasn’t a little bit responsive, at least. When she was fully alert, she wouldn't remember what had happened, as if awaking from a dream, grasping at the cloudy vision. 

Slipping a hand under her shift, trailing fingers along her smooth thighs to her stomach, casting the spell, he whispered in her ear. “Shhh, my love. Be still but awaken for me, let your body respond.”

Jodis stirred awake, vision blurry, stretching limbs as Mephala magically removed the woman’s shift and smalls, leaving her completely naked before him. The man smiled down at her as he slipped fingers between her legs, pleased she quickly got wet for him, her body ready per his demands. Watching her sleepy and dazed eyes, he pressed his lips to her nipple, suckling it, his eyes never wavering from her face. The woman stirred beneath him in her pleasure, a soft moan escaping her lips. “Yes, you like that. I knew you would,” he continued to whisper, his voice like a distant sound in the thick fog of her mind.

Satisfied the woman was ready for him, he wasted no time plunging into her, his large size was nearly painful for her as she whimpered, but he calmed her, strengthening his spell. The nefarious Daedric Prince thrust in the woman hard, aggressively, sighing in pleasure at her tightness around him. Another spell was cast that turned her barren uterus into a fruitful one, determined to impregnate her with his seed, his newest spiderling. 

The look on Mephala’s face was baleful and had Jodis been aware to see it, she would have been horrified, not to mention that the creature was raping her. Though he had the woman under a spell, she would stir periodically, knowing deep down to her core something was wrong, but he kept her under until she calmed once more, allowing him to continue his tight and forceful thrusts.

A wicked smile played his lips when he heard in the distance the sound of hoof-beats, the husband arriving home from his travels, whistling a happy tune. Soon, his world would be turned upside down when he entered his bed chambers. The whole thought aroused Mephala further as he thrust faster in the woman, soon exploding inside her, spreading his seed thrust after thrust after thrust, rolling his hips as fast and hard as his human form would allow. The rapist knew he was hurting her as she moaned out in pain, but her mind remained murky, unable to react. 

Mephala pulled out of the woman, spread her legs wide, and bent down to run a tongue along her wet folds. There was a tinge of blood in his mouth from hurting her as he moaned with pleasure to the taste. It wasn’t his intention to pleasure her, but to add to the shock of the husband about to walk in. Jodis moaned in pleasure, her sex thrust in the man’s mouth on instinct, spreading her legs farther apart, not quite realizing what she was doing. Soon her body set free in a wave of pleasure, pulsating in the man’s mouth.

Soren stopped his whistling when he came in the door to his home, not wanting to wake his wife as it wasn’t yet dawn. Sitting in a chair, he removed his boots, a smile on his face, happy to be home and pleased his sales went well. He couldn’t wait to tell Jodis about his success in Windhelm. He was in the process of removing his other boot when he heard it, like a strangled moan coming from his bedroom. Sensing something was wrong with Jodis, he limped towards the bedroom, dagger drawn and busted in the room to see a large man, his face between his wife’s legs, licking her sex. Jodis’ arms were sprawled, moaning to his pleasures, body open to the man before her. Soren knew she was in the throes of an orgasm, seeing it many times before.

The last thing Soren expected was to catch his wife in the throes of lovemaking with another man when he came home. His brain was trying to register what he was seeing, but not accepting what really was. Not once did he ever assume his wife was a cheater, then he wondered how long she had been having an affair. Did she do this every time he left town? The feeling of betrayal was pervasive as anger coursed through him.

“Why?” Soren was all he could manage to choke out, his voice hoarse in the drowning of his own emotions.

The man who had been sucking on his wife sat up, wiped his face of her wetness, and grinned at the shocked man before him who was too emotional to react violently yet. It wasn’t a smile of embarrassment at being caught. No, it was full of smugness, eyes a blanket of indifference.

“Why? She is lovely, is she not? Quite delicious, she is. Perhaps you should ask her that,” the naked man chuckled, sucking the remaining wetness of the woman off his fingers as if they had naughtily been in a dessert.

The man’s words nearly startled Soren out of his stupor and attacked him with his dagger. The man side-stepped out of the way, laughing, running out of the house naked into the snow and chill of the early morning. Soren chased after him, wishing only death on the man who not only took his wife but laughed in his face. With anger boiling over, he ran, but as soon as he reached outside, the light of Mundus casting an eerie light in the early morning fog, the man was nowhere to be seen as if he vanished completely.

Soren was hit with a new emotion, a sense of helplessness at the disaster that he came home to. He wept on his front porch for his loss. His wife may not have been dead, but she may as well have been. Jodis was not the same woman he left not only a few days before. Anger soon took over once more as he stormed into the house, his mind as turbulent as a cyclone. He opened the wardrobe they shared and threw all her clothes out into the snow, weeping angry tears.

 _How could she have done this? I had known her all my life. How could I not have seen this coming? It’s my fault, I should have been able to give her a proper child and she hated me for it. That has to be it. Regardless, she should have talked to me first._ The doubts, excuses, self-loathing, anger swirled in his mind, unable to grasp one thing, one reason to give him ease and comfort of mind.

“Get up,” Soren shouted at his wife, the animosity towards his wife taking over his very soul, ruling over his broken heart.

Jodis stirred awake from all the noise her husband was making, yelling at her. _Why is he yelling?_ As her vision and foggy mind cleared, she looked up to see her husband’s face nearly enraged, tears pouring out of his eyes. “Husband? What’s wrong? What has happened?” she asked, confused. 

“What’s wrong? What’s wrong?” he yelled, his voice nearly shrill at her stupidity to ask such a question, having the audacity to play innocent. “Get out!”

“What? I...I don’t understand…” she stammered, not understanding why her husband was so angry with her. She felt a sudden chill and looked down to find herself completely naked, sitting in a pool of her own wetness. Hands went to breasts, feeling her flesh for clothes as if her eyes were playing tricks on her. “How am I naked?”

“How...By the Gods, woman! Stop playing stupid! You are a fucking cheating whore and I want you out! NOW!”

Clarity was starting to dawn on Jodis, visions of having sex with a man flashed through her groggy mind, believing them to be a dream, but was it? She couldn’t remember, her brain grasping for reality. “No...I...I...no, that, that was a dream. I wouldn’t...ever…”

But Soren wouldn’t let her finish, not allowing her to place doubts on what he saw with his own eyes. “You would and you did...get out!”

“Husband, please...please, believe me...I would never…”

“Stop your lies! Do you think me blind! I saw a man’s face between your legs as you moaned in pleasure! You were enjoying it! I SAW it!

Jodis wept as confusion deepened, not knowing what was real or not. She would never cheat on Soren, she loved him. Did someone break in and rape her? That must have been it and she had to make Soren believe her. “Please, listen! I would never cheat on you! The man must have raped me. I...he must have cast some sort of spell on me!” She had to make her husband understand.

“Do you think me a fool?! You were in the throes of pleasure, not the pain of rape!” Soren walked over to his wife, his face in hers. “Stop your lies and get out. I never want to see you again.”

Jodis cried and moaned in her pain as she struggled to get dressed. “Pl...please, S...Soren. I wouldn’t…”

But Soren became taciturn, refusing to speak to his wife now as he walked out to sit on the porch while she gathered her things and left the house.

Jodis sobbed aloud as she gathered what remained of her things that weren’t already in the snow. She shoved them into a bag, not understanding what had happened. One thing she knew for certain was she would never cheat on her husband and the man must have raped her. There seemed to be no convincing Soren of the truth, weeping over her loss, feeling out of control. 

“Soren, please…” Jodis tried once more to the broken man sitting on the porch chair, his demeanor as cold as the morning air. 

“Just leave…” he whispered, lip quivering.

Soren wept as he watched his wife go, sobbing, part of him wanted to call her back and hold her, forgive her, believe what she told him. He forced those thoughts out of his head, not wanting to let the lies take over the truth of what he saw. No more would he be filled with her delicious cooking, no chance would there be having children running around the house, no more would he make love to his wife, to remain alone. The whole idea nearly broke him, as he watched her crest over the hill never to see Jodis again.

Jodis stretched her painful back after sleeping on the hard ground of Beggar’s Row in Riften, her only home, feeling some sharp pains in her stomach. She rubbed her stomach as the baby kicked in her. The feeling was bittersweet. She never thought she would be able to have children, but she wanted a child with Soren, not some stranger who raped her. She missed her husband every day, wishing she could go back to him.

In the beginning, she had spent countless hours tormenting herself, debating to find a way to remove the child from her womb, a constant reminder of what had happened and her loss. In the end, Jodis decided the child was innocent. It wasn’t the baby’s fault what had happened to her. At least she wouldn’t be alone for long, having something new to love, deciding the child was meant, despite Jodis’ suffering.

Begging had become her new profession as no one would hire her while pregnant, no one caring if she lived or died, such was the way in Skyrim. People were self-serving in these harsh times. The only reason she was alive still was due to the kindness of a few people who would offer her a Septim here or there so she could eat, other times she would steal what she needed. At least Beggar’s Row was free. She had made herself a little corner of the area, tried to clean it as much as she could, and ignored the other two beggars who lived with her, Edda and Snilf, not trusting them. 

Jodis went as far as to try to get in with the Thieves Guild, but they said it was no place for a pregnant woman or a child, turning her away. Once in a while, if she was lucky, she would get a job cleaning houses for extra coin. Now she was too far along to do much of anything other than lower herself to beg, but beg she did. It was either that or die. Jodis had to live for her child.

That night, a worn woolen blanket over her body, shivering, she woke with a start to sharp pains and a pool of wetness in her bedroll. At first, she didn’t know what was wrong, thinking something was happening to the baby, but as her contractions grew in regular intervals, Jodis soon realized she was about to become a mother. She didn’t want to scream, waking the other two beggars, but her body left her no choice with the onslaught of pain. The cold of the night soon forgotten as she sweated with an intensity she never dreamed of ever feeling, the pain nearly unbearable. She whimpered in relief when the contractions subsided only to be replaced with tightening cramps that spread through her entire body once more.

Jodis felt a hand grab hers, trying to pull away, but the person on the other end held fast. “Shhh, old Edda is here for you, honey. Your baby is coming.”

“I realize that…” Jodis managed to get out when the contraction passed. 

“Edda can help, I can. Had babies, Edda has.”

“You had children?”

“Yes, Edda had three, all dead now.”

Jodis tried to get away from the woman, barely able to move in her pain, afraid Edda would kill her child. “No…”

“Stupid girl, Edda won’t kill your child. My kids died, older, war, disease. Edda didn’t kill them. All the kids are gone, dead, and makes Edda a bit crazy. I help...I help. ”

With no other choice, Jodis nodded, feeling bad for not getting to know the crazy old woman, afraid of her. “Thank you.”

“Snilf!” the old woman yelled. “Get water and start heating it!”

Unable to sleep through the screams anyway, the old man got up and did as he was told, grumbling to let old Edda know his discontent, and grabbed a bucket to fill it with lake water. He started a fire in the old sewers to heat the water in the pot covering his ears to the woman’s screams as they echoed through the chamber.

Several hours later with a lot of screaming and a lot of blood, Jodis held the small infant, kissing the girl’s damp head as the baby slept, feeding. The new mother wept that night at her loss and what she had gained, both emotions feeling like they were about to tear her apart in opposite directions.

“What’s her name?” Edda asked the sobbing woman.

“Marianne. It is Nord for ‘bitter grace,’” Jodis sniffed.

The old woman nodded her head in understanding. “The father not want the child?”

Jodis let the tears slip out of her eyes once more at the memories of her husband, still missing him terribly and shook her head. “My husband kicked me out, claiming I cheated on him. I...I don’t remember...I think I was raped, but I would never cheat on him. He didn’t believe me. I wasn’t supposed to have children, being barren, but here she is. So, she is my Bitter Grace...a blessing, but a reminder of all that I have lost...she is meant.”

“Sounds like some trickster got to ya.”

Jodis looked at the crazy woman strangely, feeling a new bond with her after that night thanks to her help in delivering Marianne. “What do you mean?”

“Them Daedric Princes love messin’ with us. They toy and ruin our lives for their fun...pieces of shit,” Edda spat.

“You really think so? Is that possible?”

The old woman shrugged, “Sure why not? I believe you when you say you didn’t cheat.”

“Thank you for saying that,” Jodis said. “I...I’m sorry I have been avoiding you and Snilf. I...I have just been afraid, never living alone without a home before.”

Edda waved a hand of indifference. “We are in this together.”

As Marianne grew and Jodis became closer with Edda and Snilf, she felt confident to leave her child with them with promises of bringing them gold and food as she worked as a wench on the streets of Riften. It was the only thing she knew how to do besides cook. It was sex, how hard could it be? She had knocked on all the doors of Riften hoping to get a job cleaning houses regularly, as a nanny or a cook, but no one wanted her or they had staff already. The only job left to her was sex. 

“Are you sure you want to do this, girl? Edda never does sex for coin. Edda begs like Snilf,” the old woman lectured.

“What other choice do I have? I can’t raise a child and start a farm on my own, not having any money to even buy some property. I have tried to find work, but no one is hiring, especially a mother with no husband. I have to keep us fed...Mari fed. Begging isn’t going to be enough for her.” The whole idea disgusted her, but what other choice did she have? She did it to keep Marianne clothed and fed, hating the idea of raising a child in Beggar’s Row, but she promised herself she would shower the girl with love to make up for it.

“If you are sure, I’m not one to judge. Just know it is dangerous work, girl.”

“I know. Again, lack of choices…”

“I have five Septim I have been saving that you can have,” Snilf offered. 

Jodis nearly teared up at the offer. Most beggars were stingy with their coin and food because they had very little to share, but to offer this to her touched her deeply. She pecked him with a kiss on the head, not caring about his stench and filth as she was the same. “Thank you, Snilf. You keep it. I wish it were enough.”

The woman had lost quite a bit of weight and she tried to keep on some pounds so she wasn’t too boney, but it was hard with so little money and food. No man would want her stinking or filthy either, so she stole a nice dress from some nobles whose servants had hung clothes out to dry, taking good care of it so she could wear it over and over for work. She also stole some soap and bathed in the lake so she wasn’t too disgusting. 

“Well, how do I look?” Jodis asked the two beggars.

“You look like a fine lady, indeed,” Snilf offered.

“She looks like a wench,” Edda retorted, being honest.

“Well, that is the goal, Edda. Alright, I’m off. I’m so nervous! I...I feel...well, it doesn’t matter what I feel. It is what I have to do.”

It was later in the evening as Jodis stood outside the Bee and Barb, waiting for a drunken man to make his way to her, hoping he was too drunk to get it up. She leaned on the railing over the canal, her dress undone at the top to expose her deep cleavage and waited like a bee to honey. As the men came out, some whistled and gave her a lustful once-over, but none took her to bed except for one who finally took notice and meandered her way.

“How much,” he slurred.

“50 Septim,” Jodis replied, trying to hide the shaking nerves suddenly coursing through her body.

“You’re expensive...you better be good,” he said, too drunk to barter, mostly sex on the brain.

The man took her to a dark corner behind some buildings, him not wanting to take her home and her not having a place of her own. He leaned against the wooden side of a store and pulled down his pants. “Suck it,” he demanded. “You better be good.”

Jodis suddenly felt sick to her stomach using her body for money, feeling like she was betraying her husband somehow, and herself, but her husband didn’t love her anymore. Tucking neatly away the pain and nerves, she gave him a winning smile and got on her knees, hoping she remembered how to do it, not having sucked a man since her husband.

“Oh yeah...that’s just what I needed,” the man said as she took his hardness in her mouth. After a few minutes, he stopped her. “Nice work, wench, but I’m not paying you 50 Septim for a suck. Lift up your skirts.”

Jodis did as he ordered, trying not to cry while ignoring the humiliation as he slipped a hand between her legs feeling her dryness. 

“Rub yourself,” he ordered.

Again, Jodis did as she was told not wanting to watch the man stroke himself as he watched, but she did it with a smile on her face to ensure she was paid for all her efforts. “Do you like that?” she nearly gagged out.

“You bet I do, lady,” he replied, now excited. He was quickly on top of her, turning her around, pressing her body over the railing as he lifted her skirts, slipping inside of her from behind. The sex was rough and clumsy due to his drunken nature, or perhaps he was always that way, but Jodis was grateful it didn’t take him too long to finish.

When the evening was over, she managed to come back to her daughter with 100 Septim in her pocket. In the morning, she would get them all some fresh food for once and save the rest. Before she headed inside her crumbling ruin of a home, she threw up in a corner and wept against the stone walls, wept like she hadn’t in a long time, not since her husband kicked her out. Once she got it out of her system, she wiped her face of her tears and headed inside full of fake smiles to her child who was still awake. 

“How did it go?” Edda asked, noticing the woman had been crying.

“How do you think it went? It was humiliating, but I made some decent money.”

“How much?” Snilf asked, his excitement palpable.

“100 Septim, two men.”

“That much?” Edda asked, her surprise evident.

“Yes, it’s a start. I will get us fed tomorrow, but right now I’m exhausted and going to sleep.”

Edda and Snilf were now part of her family, but in the end, they were still beggars. Jodis worried they would steal from her, so she procured a small safebox to store her incredibly hard-earned coin in. After giving them some coins for watching Mari, she stored the rest in the box for safekeeping. Jodis hoped as long as she kept them fed, they would keep out of her stash.

The woman climbed in her bedroll, holding her growing infant who was nearly one and kissed her blonde head. “It’s all for you, sweet Mari, my love, my child, my daughter,” she whispered before she fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! We would love to know what you think about this darker story in the comments <3
> 
> Next: Having babies and surviving.


	2. Itsy Bitsy Spider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mephala introduces herself. Tragedy as hit Mari close to home, filled with sadness and bitterness. The girl is saved in a way she doesn't realize when she meets Nazir.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Character death

She ambled in the darkened tunnel, nearly all light gone, but her keen eyes could still see the door before her. Relief flooded her veins, washing away the fear she felt, but soon replaced with a dread that something terrible was going to happen. Clutching her old and worn doll close to her with one hand, she opened the door with the other. All that relief she felt moments earlier vanished when she was greeted with a world of spiderwebs and egg sacs in a decorative nightmare, the sky darkened as if in perpetual night. The scurrying and scuttling of scratches could be heard in the dark corners of the world, sending a chill up her spine, making the fine hairs on her neck stand on end.

Mari didn't know what to do or where to go or where she even was. The girl didn't know how she even got there; tears slipped down her face wondering where her mother went. Her mother always taught her to be brave and face the bad things of the world head-on, that life was worth fighting for. Taking a deep, brave breath, Mari wiped away the tears, inadvertently cleaning the dirt off that perpetually stained her face as she walked on. There was a large tower in the distance, so Mari decided to head that way with a sense of the familiar, hoping it was safe until she could find her way home.

" _Come closer, my child_ ," said a whisper in Mari's ear.

The girl quickly turned around, heart thundering in her chest to the voice, but not seeing anyone behind her. She whimpered in fear, trying to be brave as her mother taught her.

" _Do not be afraid...or be afraid. I care not, daughter, my itsy bitsy spiderling_ ," said the voice that was neither man or woman.

"I...I'm not your daughter," Mari insisted.

The ethereal whisper laughed, the sound suddenly resonant, eerily feminine. " _Oh, but you are, child. Keep walking to my tower, and I shall show you all_."

Mari headed to the tower with no other options as she was instructed, but that didn't calm her fears. Despite trying to put on a brave face, she was still only thirteen years old.

When the girl finally reached the tower, she opened the door to a world of webs so thick she could scarcely see what lay beyond. One arm clutched the doll, and her other hand fisted in attempted defiance. "Well, I'm here! What do you want?" she yelled out into the darkness.

Mari screamed, all bravery washed away in a flood of fear when she felt the web spin around her, wrapping her in a sticky cocoon, covering her entire body other than her head. Tears spilled down her face once more from the terror, struggling, squirming to get out of the web-like blanket, holding in the urine that threatened to flow.

" _Stop your sniveling, child. A daughter of mine does not weep in fear._ "

"Then stop scaring me!" the girl managed to croak out, sounding more defiant than she felt.

" _There's my daughter_ …"

"I'm not your daughter! My mama is!"

" _Yes, she is also your mother. Me, I'm your mother and father_ ," was all the androgenous voice said, leaving more questions than giving answers. 

Mari watched in horror as the creature climbed down from her web, standing before her, shape-shifting from the biggest spider the girl had ever seen to a strangely beautiful woman, several spider legs protruding from behind her as if they were some horrific wings, looking nearly like a demon despite the lovely face.

"Hmm, too bad you look like your mother. You should have been dark, your blonde hair too bright for my tastes."

"What do you want? Let me go," Mari demanded.

"In due time. I need you here for a moment, but if you keep making demands and interrupting me, I will have to cover your mouth in fine silk to silence you."

Satisfied the girl would be silent, the creature stood before the girl, a triumphant smile on her face, or was it sadistic, Mari couldn't tell. She tried to use her new found powers on the creature, to manipulate its mind, but nothing worked.

"Your tricks don't work on me, child, for they are my tricks," said the Daedric Prince of lies, sex, murder, and secrets.

Mephala touched the girl's head with a spider leg, surprisingly gentle, it's delicate hairs brushing against her face. Mari's eyes rolled up in her head when she received the vision of how she was conceived. She watched how the little spider soon turned into a naked man raping the sleeping woman, the woman who was her mother. The horror show continued as she saw her mother's husband screaming at her, throwing her out into the snow, her mother weeping, struggling to stay alive until she gave birth to Mari.

The scene was painful and something her mother never told her about, who was always honest with her, so she must have kept that secret from Mari for a reason. The tears pooled down the girl's face at seeing her mother's pain due to the betrayal of this creature before her. There was also a strange sense of hatred and anger at the man who was her mother's husband. "You raped my mother! You ruined her life..."

Before Mari could finish, she woke up with a start looking around, confused, seeing her mother with a worried look on her face. Confusion soon gave way to familiarity as she realized she had been dreaming and still living in their little one-room shack in Riften. Her mother had saved up enough Septim to buy the little run-down place to give Mari a better home than Beggar's Row, though it wasn't much better, at least it was warm.

"Good Gods, Mari! I couldn't wake you for the longest time! I thought you were growing ill or something horrible had happened," her mother explained, pulling the girl in close, embracing her. 

"I'm fine, mama," she said, hugging her mother back, letting the love flow through her, the much-needed light. Life was hard, but her mother always tried to be kind to her, giving her plenty of love and attention, and to educate her as best she could.

"Do you want to talk about the dream? By the looks of it, it seemed to be a bad one."

Mari nodded, "Yeah, it was pretty scary. Mama? Why didn't you tell me about the strange man that night who raped you?"

Jodis' breath caught in her chest, hand gasping her heart as if to magically steady it. "How did…"

"It was in my dream. I saw it all, mama."

Tears soon flooded Jodis' eyes as she wept at the horrible memories. "I don't remember what happened exactly. I always believed I was raped, but Soren thought I was lying. I...I didn't think that was something you needed to know...how you came to be. You are still so young. I wanted you to believe you were conceived out of love, but please know, my beautiful girl, you were birthed with love. I just didn't want you to know you were conceived through rape. How did you dream such a thing?"

Mari grabbed her mother's hand with affection, "It's OK, mama. It wasn't your fault. Mephala showed me the truth, who is also my mother and father, who brought me into this world. I don't know what she wants from me, but I hate her. I hate that she hurt you, but I am glad to be alive and with you."

Jodis pulled her daughter close, holding her so tightly, afraid she would lose her daughter at any moment. It was the first time her beliefs had been confirmed and by her own daughter no less. It horrified her that her daughter knew the truth, but a sense of justification that she wasn't crazy also filled her. 

Mari was such an old soul, so smart for such a young age, wise beyond her years. The very idea the girl came from a Daedric Prince explained everything. It demonstrated the girls' uncanny ability to see deep inside others, manipulate their minds. Jodis tried to keep the girl from doing it, but it became a useful tool as it helped bring them more gold. 

"Thank you for telling me this, Mari. I always wondered…"

"Soren was a bad man! How could he not believe you despite what he saw! It was clear what was happening, the way I saw it."

"He was a good man, child. He...he was blinded by his hurt and sense of betrayal. It can happen when you love someone so deeply, it is sometimes hard to think clearly."

"It's no excuse! He should have listened if he loved you so much!" The anger soon flooded Mari. If Soren had listened, the three could have lived a life much happier than what they currently had. Instead, he chose to throw her mama out in the snow, this good woman who did whatever she could to keep Mari fed, clothed, and healthy, filled with love. It wasn't fair!

"Shhh, the only thing that matters is you, my child," Jodis said, pressing her forehead to her daughter's.

Mari reached for her mother's face, touching it with small and delicate fingers. "You matter too, mama."

Those simple words made Jodis weep all the more, her love for her daughter filling her more than she thought possible. Soon, a feeling of calmness coursed through her, her weeping suddenly stopped. Jodis felt happy and sane once more, not realizing her daughter had used her abilities to calm her mother.

"What else did Mepahla have to say," Jodis asked.

"She said my powers will grow and that I have a purpose of being, but she didn't tell me what that purpose is. I don't want to do her bidding...I won't. I hate her!"

"Good. You make your own destiny, Mari. It's your life, not hers...or his, or whatever Mephala is."

Mari woke with a start, the thunder sounds crashing as if right over her roof. There was so much lightning, it lit up the dark evening as the storm passed through. Usually, the girl enjoyed thunderstorms and slept right through them, but there was some else lurking in the back of her mind, a sense of foreboding. _Something is wrong_. 

The girl got out of the bed she and her mother shared looking around, hoping to see her mother at their small dining table having a late-night snack from an evening of working, but the home was empty other than Mari. The lightning flashed once more, followed by the thunderous crash. "Mama…" she muttered, suddenly afraid.

She didn't bother to get dressed as she ran out into the stormy night, no time to waste, something was wrong. _Mama_ …

Running through the town, her shift drenched in the rain, chilling her to the bone, but she kept running, looking for her mother. _Mama_ …

The dread filled her hungry stomach like rotten food, making her feel ill. _I'm too late_ , she continued to repeat in her head as she ran. The pelting rain felt like needles on her exposed flesh, as her fears stabbed her heart. _Mama_...

Mari saw it there, behind a building, an arm flung on the walkway as the lightning crashed. She slowed her pace, seeing the arm attached to the barely moving body, blood being washed away in the downpour. _Mama_ …

Mari sat hard on her knees, unable to tell where her tears began, and the rain ended on her face. Rolling over the woman, her mother was bleeding profusely from her stomach, cuts, and bruises marred her beautiful face. The girl pulled her mother's dense form on her lap, brushing the damp hair out of her face. "Mama…" she whispered, lip quivering. Her mother was still alive, but barely. It was too late. She was too late.

"Mari…" her mother croaked out. "I'm so...s...sorry."

"Stop, you'll be OK, mama," she sobbed.

"No, honey. I'm so sorry," Jodis repeated. "I...I wish I could have given you more. I l...love you s...so much."

"Please…"

"Be a good girl for me...be s...strong."

"I will, mama."

As Jodis was dying, Mari placed her hands on the sides of her mother's head, eyes rolling back as she received her vision. Two men, laughing, not wanting to pay for her services, beating her. One was blonde and bearded, a Nord. The other was a Dunmer, dark skin, red eyes. She visualized their faces, never to forget as Mari could sense her mother's pain as they hit her, stabbed her, leaving her for dead. She tried to crawl home to her daughter.

Mari sobbed when she lost connection as her mother finally died. "No! Mama, no… Please!" The girl tried to cast a healing spell, but restoration wasn't her strength. Her magic was more of the darker sort. She curled next to her mother, laying her head on her stomach and wept, kissing her mother's hand.

The girl didn't know how long she had been sleeping or when she even fell asleep as she was awakened by strong hands lifting her up. Her vision cleared, seeing guards taking her away. "What have you done, child," one of them yelled.

"No, no, no...she was my mother. Someone killed her...I…"

But the guards wouldn't listen as they dragged her off to jail, struggling. "Please…"

Mari's eyes rolled to the back of her head once more, only sclera visible as she cast her spell unknowingly as if to let the world know her pain and grief. The guards' bodies imploded from the inside as they collapsed in a heap, dead. "Oh no…" she whimpered when she came to.

Running, she barged into her house, grabbed the few things she owned, shoving them into a bag, and fled Riften. If she didn't run, they would kill her for the murder of the guards or throw her in the horrible orphanage, so she ran and ran and ran. 

At fourteen, her mother taught Mari quite a bit on how to survive, but not the sort of survival one needed to live out in the wilderness, so Mari would have to use her own intelligence and ingenuity to survive alone. The tears continued to flow for her loss until she found an old run-down shack, not unlike her old home and curled up on the floor to sleep away her grief.

Mari didn't know how long she had slept, her hungry stomach waking her. It was dark outside as she cast a mage light to see, looking around the tiny home in hopes of finding some things she could use. In a rotted trunk, she found a rusty dagger and shoved it in the pocket of her worn dress, but not much else could be found.

She stacked wood boards into a pile and cast a flame spell on it to have a fire for warmth. Sitting down, she contemplated her options, trying not to think about her mother, instead, thinking about what she needed to do to survive. First, she needed to protect herself. She wasn't going to stay in the house forever, but she needed help while she was there.

Casting her conjuration spell, she summoned a large Frost Spider, something she had been practicing without her mother's knowledge, not wanting to scare her. Most people didn't appreciate spiders. The creature stood as a sentry, ready for any wayward animal or person wishing to harm Mari. Closing her eyes, she envisioned the men who killed her mother, anger coursing through her once more. One thing was certain, her most immediate goal, next to finding food, was to kill the two men. They should not be allowed to live after what they did to her mother. 

Their faces formed in her mind as it branched out, reaching like tendrils until she found their location through their thoughts. They were not far from her, living in a small house outside of Riften. Grabbing a coarse stone of the ground, she started to sharpen her new blade. It wasn't the best tool, but it was enough to cut through their flesh, painfully so.

Now that she knew where her mother's killers were, she took her spider for a walk, hunting for food. She may not be able to hunt, but the Frost Spider could paralyze a creature with frost venom long enough for Mari to kill it.

After eating her rabbit, she cast another spider to watch over her and slept once more before heading out in the morning. Mari fell asleep with dreams of death of the two men who destroyed her meager, yet happy life.

Mari reached the house of the two murderers, tucking away her bag and cloak so she wouldn't get blood all over them, closed her eyes, and sensed that the two men were still sleeping even mid-day to being overly drunk from the night before. She should have worried why it was so easy for her to have this desire to kill the men, never taking a life before, except for accidentally killing the guards, but she supposed it was her darker nature, thanks to Mephala. Mari didn't care as long as her mother's death was avenged, letting her rage boil over. 

Trying the door, the two stupid men left it open for anyone to enter—good for her, bad for them. Mari conjured her spider in case she needed it, pulled out her dagger, and silently walked through the small house looking for the sleeping men. There they were, sleeping off their alcoholic induced brains, snoring loudly, the stench of liquor and body odor permeated the air around them. 

"Wakey, wakey," said the young girl standing before the two sleeping men.

The murderers slowly woke up, rubbing the sleep out of their eyes, not sensing the danger they were currently in due to their intoxicated minds. "Whass goin' on?" the Dunmer said.

Mari cast a paralyzing spell on the two men, leaving them unable to move or speak. The only thing they could do was blink and breathe, instinctual reactions. Sitting on the Nord's chest, she looked down at his frightened eyes, hearing a slight whimper coming out of his unmoving mouth. 

"I am small still, but stronger than the two of you. You did something very wrong the other night. You took the life of a beautiful woman. A woman who looks just like me for she was my mother. She worked hard to keep me fed and clothed, a roof over my head. She did whatever it took, and you punished her for it. You beat her and stabbed her, and for what? So you wouldn't have to pay for the sex she offered you? The only job she could hold so I would survive? Do you even realize what she went through for me? You took that away from her, and you took away my mother, a woman who loved me, the ONLY person who ever loved me. Now I am alone because you two are hateful, murderers who only think of their dicks. Now you two will die for your poor choices."

The fear in the men's eyes was evident as their minds cleared, realizing how much danger they really were in. The Nord's eyes slowly vacated as he bled out after she drew his dagger to his throat. At least he knew why he was dying in the end. That was more than her mother got.

When Mari approached the Dunmer, tears were streaming down his face, knowing his end was near. He knew killing the woman was a bad idea, but the crazy Nord insisted so they wouldn't have to pay, saving their coins for more drinks. He too quickly died as he bled out, his only thought was that he wasn't in pain when she killed him.

The Frost Spider vanished when the spell wore off as Mari headed outside, covered in blood. Though her face conveyed calmness, she turned the corner around the house and emptied the contents of her meager meal from that morning. It was the first life she had ever taken. While it was one thing to be determined to kill someone, it was quite another to actually do it. 

Walking over to the stream, she washed the dagger, dried it, and slipped it in her pocket once more. Internally, she berated herself for not clearing the house of necessities. Reluctantly, Mari headed back into the house and conducted a thorough search of gold and other things she might need for her travels. There was a bow, a quiver full of arrows, a sword that was too heavy for her, so she left it, some food she stuffed into her bag, a blanket. There were some socks too large for her, but they would keep her feet warm, and a waterskin so she could keep water on her at all times.

The evening was quickly approaching, so Mari made camp by the stream near the dead men's house, starting a fire and eating some of the food she had stolen. While killing the men made her stomach turn, it did nothing to calm her anger over her loss. As she stewed, the girl thought of the man who threw her mother out into the snow, forcing her to live a life that eventually led to her death. The entire thing was Mephala's fault, but if the Daedric Prince had not come into her mother's life, she would never have existed. It was something Mari was struggling with, strange emotions, this hate yet appreciation for her life. But Soren, the man who was married to her mother, refused to listen. She would be alive if he had just spent one minute listening. Her mother would not only be alive, but they would have been a family. 

Mari refused to cry anymore as she curled up on the ground by the fire, draping the blanket she found over her for added warmth and fell asleep, dreams of webs, spiders, and death flooded her sleeping mind.

The man sat cross-legged, hiding in a copse of trees as she watched the teen girl, blonde hair flowing behind her, face a mask of rage as she entered the house. His movements were always with purpose and a sense of calmness. The young man had been hired to kill the two men for a previous theft and murder. Astrid, the new leader of the Dark Brother had received a hefty payment and letter explaining what needed to be done with the rest of the payment when the job was finished. The Dark Brotherhood was powerful at once upon a time, but no longer through wars and betrayals. Astrid had turned the remaining sanctuary into a family and a business. 

Nazir left Hammerfell awash in blood from war, doing things he wasn't proud of, but the Dark Brotherhood found him and gave him a purpose once more, a family, and for that, he would be forever grateful, especially to Astrid who took him under her wing despite her youth. The man was still quite youthful himself at only twenty Summers.

Instead of stopping the girl or killing her outright, he wanted to see what happened—what she would do. He knew murderous intent when he saw it.

There was a report out of Riften that a woman had recently been murdered, and her teen daughter was thought to be the killer, but Nazir knew better, knowing those two men had been in town that night looking for drink and trouble. This girl was probably the daughter avenging the death of her mother. 

Nazir usually wouldn't allow anyone to take his job, but a girl of only thirteen or fourteen years, by the look of it, unafraid of what she was about to do, decided to watch. Unraveling the fabric covering his mouth from his headwrap, he grabbed an apple out of his bag, taking a large bite of the juicy fruit, liquid dripping down his smooth dark skin. As he cleaned his chin with the back of his hand, eyes, black as night, were hard from a lifetime of struggles, yet soft when he wanted them to be as he observed the young girl.

Despite his youth, there wasn't much that surprised the man, but here this young girl did that very thing as she conjured a giant Frost Spider, though his face conveyed nothing. He knew mages could conjure all sorts of creatures, but never knew any of them who could summon such a thing before. Usually, dark mages would conjure the more grotesque, and there was definitely a darkness in the girl.

By the time he was finished with his apple, the core tossed to the side, the young bloodied blonde girl had come running out and vomited around the corner. A smile played on his lips, knowing exactly how she felt. He too threw up the first time he killed someone. The body and the mind tended to be in conflict with each other, fighting over morality and evil. Killers eventually hardened to the feeling. While he was a murder, he didn't kill indiscriminately. Nazir was a man for hire, trying to take jobs worthy of his services, ensuring the targets deserved it, but sometimes he just had to do what he was hired to do, not one to disobey orders.

The two men definitely deserved all that young girl gave them, known for their drunken and abusive behavior. As evening approached, the girl made camp away from the house and fell asleep. Once all was clear, Nazir stood and stretched silently, his legs stiff from sitting still for so long, and headed into the house to see the girl's handiwork. Sure enough, the two men had been killed by her, throats slit. But that wasn't the interesting thing. What was interesting was the young girl managed to do it without the men putting up a fight. How did she overpower two strong men and kill them with no injury to herself? There wasn't even an attempt to defend themselves. Surely they would have woken up to someone unprofessional and not precisely silent in her movements. _Curious_.

Leaning against the stone by the fire, back straight, legs crossed, he watched the girl sleep. Part of him thought about killing her for taking his kill, but he was too interested in her and how she managed to pull off a near-perfect kill at such a young age, and inexperienced no less. 

The teen must have sensed a presence, slowly waking up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. If she was alarmed at seeing Nazir sitting by her fire watching her sleep, she gave no indication. He gave a slight smile at this gem he had found, a diamond in the rough, just waiting to be shaped, faceted, honed. 

Her honey wheat hair was in tangles, spattered with dried blood. Her cerulean eyes nearly glowed in the firelight, drawing him in. They were eyes of intelligence, eyes that had seen more in her youth than most in their lifetimes. She was going to be beautiful if and when she reached adulthood.

"Who are you?" she asked.

"My name is Nazir," he said, giving his head a slight bow in greeting.

"Why haven't you killed me?"

"That is a good question. I'm not sure, to be honest. You intrigue me, I suppose." Once again, he was impressed by the girl. She didn't seem to be afraid to die, and her question, so forthcoming, instantly knowing what he was.

Mari didn't ask how he got past her spider as it was nowhere to be found. The man had probably returned it back to Oblivion by killing it. It didn't matter, she could conjure another. "Why do I intrigue you?" she asked, sitting cross-legged as the man was, mirroring his form.

Nazir blew out a chuckle, unable to maintain a straight face any longer. "You are full of smart questions, young spiderling, aren't you? You killed those men so effortlessly, and your conjuring abilities are something one doesn't see except with expert mages. Who are you?"

"I'm Marianne…"

"Bitter Grace."

"Yes, but my mama called me Mari."

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Mari. I am Nazir."

The girl's stare at him never wavered as she peeked at him through the flames of her fire. Looking away would have shown weakness to the girl, still wondering what she was. No, there was something special about this girl. Nazir could sense it with every fiber of his being. 

"What are you, Mari?" he finally asked.

The girl cocked her head, unsmiling, but answered him. "I am Jodis' daughter. I am also the daughter of Mephala."

It was as if fate had slapped him in the face, and Nazir wondered if Mephala herself had a hand in this chance meeting. He hid his shock well, hearing the truth of her words. It all became apparent as the girl mentioned the Daedric Prince, one who was closely connected to the Dark Brotherhood, as well as the past Morag Tong of the Dunmer, who worshiped the Prince.

"Fascinating...yes, I see it now. The spiders...you paralyzed those men in there, didn't you? Just like a little spider yourself."

"Yes. I didn't show mama I could conjure spiders. It would have scared her."

"Indeed," Nazir chuckled. "Did your mother know what you are?"

"Yes, I told her."

"And she still loved you despite all that darkness coursing through you?"

"She loved me very much, and I loved her. Why do you think I killed those men? She was everything to me. I may have darkness in me, but I'm not a bad person. I try not to be."

"I see. I am glad you had some love in your life. It is more than many have and it will carry you far," he explained, ending it on a wistful whisper. "What else can you do?"

"If I tell you, then I will lose my advantage."

Nazir couldn't help but shake his head at the girl's intelligence, this time laughing out loud. It was a deep and throaty laugh, but no less pleasant. "I know you have no reason to trust me, but I have no plans to hurt you or force you to defend yourself. If I had, I would have already done so."

Mari's eyes rolled back exposing the whites of her eyes, sitting stock-still as she cast her spell on the unsuspecting Redguard.

The young man stood abruptly, his body with no power or will of his own and walked over to the girl's bag, pulling out some cheese inside a folded cloth, handing it to her. "Thank you," she said, letting Nazir go.

Nazir tried to steady his heart with a hand to his chest. It had taken great energy and effort to try to break her spell but to no avail. "Th...that was unbelievable!" he explained, no longer able to control his excitement. It was scary at first, having no control, but the power the young girl wielded was amazing, imaging her power as she grew. He came to a decision.

"How would you like to come home with me? I have a family, so to speak. We are the Dark Brotherhood, a family of assassins. We work for hire, and with your skills, you could bring us quite a fortune while helping to rid Skyrim of evil. You could possibly be one of the more successful assassins in a long time with powers like yours."

"A killer? Is that what you are?"

"Yes," he nodded. "But you already knew that."

"Mama told me I should do good."

"And you will. There are many people out there who deserve what they get from the Dark Brotherhood. Without us, corruption would run rampant through all of Tamriel. We help keep the balance."

"You think I would be good at this?"

"I do. Do you have anything else better to do? Any plans other than just killing those two men who murdered your mother?"

Mari nodded, "Yes, there is one more person I must see, then I will go with you."

"Very well, Mari."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This too was a dark chapter, and the next won't be as dark and it goes up from there.
> 
> Next: Mari's choices continue and she finds a new home.


	3. What Could Have Been and Will Be

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari visits a man in her mother's memories. Nazir brings Mari to her new home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let us know what you think in the comments. Things will start looking up after this chapter.

Nazir wrapped his thick cloak around the shivering young girl sitting in front of him as they rode his black stallion through the downpour. Mari instructed him on where to go as she followed her instinct and senses based on her mother's memories, and Mephala's version of story-telling, on where to go.

"Are you OK, child?" Nazir asked in her silence.

"I'm not a child," the girl huffed.

"You are still a child, though admittedly, you do not act like one. Most would complain about the cold and rain."

"Mama taught me to make the most of what I have."

"Your mother sounds like a strong woman."

"She was…" Mari trailed off, not wanting to talk anymore about her mother lest she cry again, which she didn't want to do.

Sensing the girl's sadness, Nazir stopped talking about her mother, shifting to another subject. "I am trusting you, but would you mind telling me where we are going?"

"To a farm."

The Redguard huffed a bit in irritation, "I mean, where are we going specifically. What are your plans once we get there?"

"We are going to see a man who ruined my mother's life."

"I see, so this is revenge then?"

"Do you have a problem with that?" she asked, looking back at the man.

"I do not, but it may not make you feel better, trust me when I tell you this."

"I don't care if it makes me feel better. It is not why I am doing it. I am doing it because my mother was good, and he is not."

Nazir nodded in understanding, though the girl couldn't see. "You are smart beyond your years, Mari," he said.

"My mama said I had an old soul."

"Indeed. It seems your mother was smart as well."

Mari said nothing as they rode on through the cold rain. Her shivering had not subsided, but she was grateful the man tried to keep her warm.

"I have never been on a horse before," she said after a long period of silence. "He is pretty."

"He is stolen. My travels were far," Nazir explained in as few words as possible.

"Does he have a name?"

"He is stolen," the Redguard repeated.

"We will call him Frigga."

Nazir cocked an eyebrow, wondering why the child would want to name a stolen horse. "Frigga?"

Mari nodded, "Yes, Frigga is a type of spider. I like them and used to play with the ones I caught as a child. They are little and jump, making me giggle, and have lovely colors."

"This horse is not cute, nor does he have lots of colors," Nazir contradicted. "He has yet to make me...giggle."

"So! I like the spider, and his name is Frigga." Though she was defensive, she couldn't help but give the Redguard a little laugh, imagining the stoic man giggling.

The man chuckled at her defense, reminding him she was still a child. "Very well. Frigga, it is. He is yours when we return to Falkreath."

"You are giving him to me? Why?" Mari asked, looking back at the dark-eyed man, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"Do you not want him?"

"I do, but...why? You barely know me."

"I normally have no use for a horse. Besides, I have lots of things, and you have nothing. Now you have something."

"I...thank you, Nazir."

"You are welcome, but you must care for him as you would a family member."

"I will," she promised.

Mari couldn't help the small smile that rose on her face as she patted the wet horse. As they rode on, she struggled to stay awake, the lulling of the stallion as he walked was sleep-inducing. She nodded her head as she dozed, startled awake with the sudden head drop. "Talk to me. I have to stay awake, so I know when we get there."

"What would you like to talk about?" he asked.

"I saw a lot of death in your mind—a lot of death. What happened?"

"You should not be entering thoughts without permission," Nazir reprimanded, feeling intruded upon, suddenly angry. "Besides, that is none of your business."

"I thought that is why you wanted me...because of my powers," she said, feeling a bit dejected, confused.

"Yes, for your future work, not to use on family and friends. It is...rude. Some people keep secrets close to them and do not wish to share with others. Consider that your first lesson."

Mari nodded in understanding, feeling guilty for intruding on his thoughts. She had the power and just did it on instinct, not thinking about how it would make others feel. It was done periodically to her mother, but her mother never knew, so Mari was never taught the right and wrong of it. "I'm sorry," she finally said.

Nazir looked down at the girl and her piercing eyes looking up at him to see she was sincere. "It is OK, but please do not do that again unless you have my permission to do so. Perhaps one day I will tell you the story. Today is not that day."

"I won't," she said.

Despite her desire to stay awake, the shame kept her silent for the rest of the trip until she reached the farm. She could see the large home situated on top of a small hill surrounded by crops, cattle, and chickens. The barn had several cats sitting outside to keep the rodents away. It was bigger than she imagined, realizing the extent of what her mother lost.

"This is the place," she informed him.

Nazir slowed the horse down as the girl quickly jumped down and rushed to the door. "Mari, wait…"

"No, I must do this alone. You stay here," she ordered.

Stubborn child, he thought but stayed per her request. Rushing, as she did, could get her killed one day if she wasn't careful. He would train her, teach her the ways of silence and subterfuge. Nazir had a desire to give her all he knew, and he was certain she would teach him a few things too. He would ask the old man, Festus, to train her in the ways of magic, though he was confident the girl would have a thing or two to teach the expert mage as well.

Hopping off Frigga, Nazir led the horse to graze in the grass as he waited in the shadows of the barn, leaning against the wooden walls as one of the cats, orange-stripped, rubbed its furry body against his boot, marking its territory. Nazir huffed and gently nudged the cat away from him.

The door was locked, but that was no challenge for the girl as she used an Alteration spell to open it. As she opened the door, she pulled out her rusted dagger, preparing herself for what was inside. The room opened up to a parlor with two chairs by the fire, one worn, the other appeared dusty with misuse. Walking forward, she tried not to rush by the fire to warm her cold hands and headed towards the kitchen, looking for him, knowing what he looked like through visions. Silently, she eased into the room, seeing a man with his back turned to her, hands tangled in his hair as his head rested in them.

Instead of just stabbing him in the back, she wanted the man to know what he had done to her and her mother, to show the error of his ways and make him feel the regret so profoundly that he would want to die. But as she moved to the other side of the table, she could see a broken man before her, a goblet in front of him smelling of something sharp, alcoholic. His hair was dark and threaded with grays, but still thick. He didn't even look up as she sat down across from him.

When the man looked up at the intrusion, she could see tired eyes, older eyes than from her visions. The look on his face was one of someone who didn't care any longer, no emotions appeared like surprise, fear, anger. He just looked at the girl until it finally registered on his face, his eyes recognized as if a fog had lifted and the land revealed itself clearly.

Soren saw the girl sit down in front of him, and it took a moment to register who she was as tears suddenly appeared in his eyes. She looked just like her, just like Jodis from the hair down to the eyes, full lips, straight nose. He knew right then that this girl must have been her daughter. He didn't know how that was possible, but he just sat there, staring at the beautiful girl before him, though covered in filth, hair a mess. She looked just like Jodis did when she was a girl herself. Soren had no idea what to say to the creature before him. While her eyes looked like Jodis', they were filled with a calculated coldness instead of her mother's warmth.

"Why are you crying?" Mari asked. Her head was cocked watching the man—curious.

"Y...you look just like her," Soren explained, trying to reel in the flood of emotions.

"Why do you care? You hated her."

"I...I loved her. I was broken and hurt, unable to trust her."

"You killed her. Everything was your fault," Mari said, nearly yelling, but kept herself calm despite the growing emotions building, trying not to cry.

"I did not!" Soren yelled, slamming his hand on the table. "She cheated on me! She hurt me! She made her choice, and it wasn't me!"

"You know that is a lie. I can see it in you and on your face. You are filled with doubt," the girl informed him with unexpected intuitiveness for a young teen girl.

"How could… Your mother said she was raped, but I saw what I saw."

"You saw what you wanted to see. I saw everything. My mother showed me in her mind, both of my mothers…"

"Both of what?"

Mari ignored his question. "Mama was sleeping when the spider came to her that night. The little spider that lived in the corner of your house. She grew and grew and became a man. He wanted to ruin you and Mama. He wanted to destroy your happiness and...to have me. He wanted me."

Soren was confused as to what the girl was talking about—spiders changing to men? "I don't... don't understand…" The pull of intense sorrow was tugging at him, nearly pulling him apart, all that pain from that night nearly breaking him, tears slipping out of his eyes. Soren never got over Jodis; he loved her that much, so he had looked for her a few times, but he wasn't able to find her.

The girl sighed in annoyance, but the more she sat watching the man weep for her mother, the less angry she became. "It was Mephala. Mephala wanted a child. Mephala likes to toy and destroy, pull strings of fate for her amusement. She chose you and Mama that night, impregnating her. She had me. I am also Mephala's daughter. I hate Mephala for what she did, but she also gave me life. I hate you for what you did to Mama, her fate led to her death because you didn't believe her, forgive her."

The older man shook his head as if shaking away the cobwebs in his brain. Part of him wanted to believe the child, that Jodis was innocent, told the truth of her rape. But if he believed it, then he was indeed at fault for his wife's demise, the pain in him grew with the knowledge that she was gone, dead, and there would be no forgiveness, no wishful reuniting—the time to be together once more gone forever.

"I...I looked for her," he sobbed out, emotions finally ruling his heart and mind, the realization that his lost chance to be with her again was stabbing. That small bit of hope was the only thing that kept him going, trudging forward in life.

Mari cocked her head, closed her eyes, and sensed the truth of his words as she invaded his mind despite the lecture she received from Nazir. She needed to know the truth.

_Two days after Jodis fled to Soren's anger, he couldn't sleep, doubt flooding him that perhaps his wife was telling the truth, that she was raped. The pain was unbearable, so many negative emotions ran through his body he could barely sort them out, not telling where the sadness began, and the anger ended._

_Soren grabbed his cloak, bag and saddled his old horse to go look for her, to bring her home so they could talk. Regret was keen that he never gave her a chance to speak, hating himself that he didn't believe her. He struggled with what she told him because his eyes did not lie, she enjoyed it, but what if it was real and a spell was cast upon her. Soren remembered the confused look on her face at seeing his anger and feeling her own naked body that night._

_He spent nearly a week looking for Jodis, even headed into Riften, but he didn't know about Beggar's Row; otherwise, he would have looked for her there. Eventually, he had to return home to his farm, the regret filling his very soul._

_A few months later, he went out to look for her once more, but to no avail. Soren never could find her again, eventually giving up to live a life of hurt, pain, and regret. He spent his years farming, remaining successful despite his addiction to drink, never to love again._

The girl stilled her quivering lip at his pain, his story, knowing he was telling the truth. She stood up and walked up next to him, placing gentle hands on either side of his face. "I have a gift," she said, closing her eyes, giving him her mother's memories, all of it, including her own from the night of meeting Mephala.

The sob that escaped his lips was strangled, the pain recognizable, the guilt. "It was all my fault...all of it."

"Yes, but it was also Mephala's. I forgive you," she said. "I see what you did and your pain, and I forgive you."

Mari breathed a shuddered breath to calm her own emotions and started to walk off before she felt a firm grip on her arm.

"Wait…" he said. "Please, don't go. I… I have to know you. You are her—she is you."

The girl looked away from the man as she let a tear slip, shaking her head. "We could have been a family. Instead, we lived in squalor as mom sold herself to keep me alive. I forgive you, but it is hard to forget the pain. She did her best, showering me with love despite where I came from."

"Please…" he repeated, nearly begging with his eyes.

"I must go to live another life chosen for me. I nearly killed you today, but you need to live and remember her. I...I may return one day. I may need you, and when that time comes, you will help me," she prophesied.

"Yes, yes...anything. I will help make things right. I swear it!"

Mari nodded to the man, pulled up her damp hood, and headed out of Soren's life until the day she needed him.

"One more thing before you go, please, what is your name?"

"Mama called me Marianne."

"Bitter Grace," he translated, nodding in understanding.

"Is it done?" Nazir asked when he saw Mari approach him.

The blonde girl shook her head, "He lives, and I have forgiven him."

The only indication Nazir was surprised was the cocking of an eyebrow, "Interesting. May I ask why?"

Mari stood in front of the tall Redguard looking up, sadness evident in her bright blue eyes. "He has been in pain since he kicked my Mama out. He looked for her but was never able to find her and bring her home. I saw his truth. I gave him mine. I will need him one day."

"You can see the future?" he asked, surprised once more at every turn with this young girl.

"No, it was a sense...a feeling that I would need him. Not any time soon, but eventually."

"Very well."

Nazir jumped on Frigga, pulling Mari up in front of him and made their long journey to Falkreath.

After the girl left, Soren stood, picked up his drink, and dumped the contents outside. Something soon overcame him, going back in the house, he gathered all ales, meads, wines and dumped them outside as well, vowing to never drink again. Marianne would need him one day, and he would be ready, promising to clean up his life, give her a happy home. She may not have been his daughter, but she could have been. Jodis couldn't have children, but the girl gave him the visions, the memories and saw it was all Mephala's doing. Instead of being bitter, which he had been for the past fourteen years, he chose to make life better once more, a chance to love again, a daughter he never thought he would ever have. Despite all the pain, the girl gave him, more than he already felt for years, he felt the first twitch of a smile grace his face.

Mundus came out in the afternoon, the clouds clearing away, leaving the day warmer, yet humid. As evening approached, climbing in altitude through the mountains, the warmth gave way to a chill as the snow started to appear on the ground from days before, unmelted. 

"We will stay in Ivarstead until morning," Nazir informed her.

"I have never been anywhere but Riften. What is Ivarstead like?"

"It is small. It is not Riften."

Mari had already gotten used to the few words Nazir offered her questions. Even though he wasn't verbose, he said a lot. His very being conveyed information, answers. He called her an old soul, but his was far older. The girl knew it was because, like she, he was forced to grow faster than his years. Hardship would do that.

The girl was getting tired as the evening arrived, not yet in Ivarstead. She eventually dozed, and Nazir drew her back into him so she wouldn't fall. Already, he felt a strange bond with the girl. It was as if she could read him, beyond her abilities, a sense of who and what he was, that she accepted him as is, unafraid. The man wondered if the girl felt the same.

Concerns about bringing home this girl to the Dark Brotherhood passed his mind, worried about how Astrid would take it. She was a young leader, but smart, ruthless, controlling. Nazir respected her, but she was difficult to please. It was uncommon for others to bring home recruits, but he was confident Astrid would see the girl's potential and help train her. He prayed to Sithis that Astrid would accept Mari.

"We are here," he said, waking up Mari.

The girl sat up, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, yawning, and looked around the small but well-lit town. They both got down from Frigga and stabled him, making their way to Vilemyr Inn for the night. They made it just in time to have dinner before the innkeeper headed off to bed, eating whatever was leftover in the cooking pot, the bread starting to stale from being baked early that morning.

Mari didn't care as she devoured her food, the hunger taking over with the smell of food. Her mother was an excellent cook whenever she had enough coins to get decent ingredients. It was a rare treat, but her mother always made sure Mari had a lavish dinner on her Name-Day. 

Nazir ate more purposefully, savoring his food, never knowing if a meal would be his last, chewing slowly as he watched the girl go from calm and collected to near animalistic as she ate, clearly hungry. "Slow down. You will choke. Savor your food, enjoy it."

"I am too hungry," she retorted with a mouth full of dry bread. "I will be more polite next time."

Nazir couldn't help but give a breathy chuckle, nodding to her, but not saying anything. He let her eat how she wanted, but she would need to be adequately trained in manners if she is to get close to her marks of noble birth. Sometimes they killed in the shadows; other times, it was face to face, depending on the complexity of the job.

"What will I do with the Dark Brotherhood?" she finally asked.

"Shhh, do not speak of such things aloud," he admonished.

"Sorry. What will I do," Mari whispered.

Since there were hardly any people in the inn, he leaned in and told her. "We hunt the enemies of those who hire us, kill them. We use all tools at our disposal to do so. We are not what we once were, not after the Great War."

"Why? What happened?"

"Our power dramatically diminished thanks to betrayals and those that believed we were no longer needed."

Mari nodded as if she understood all the complexities of life, stuffing more stew in her mouth. 

"It was before my time, but the Night Mother, the Keeper, and the Listener were the ones who held all the power. Simply put, someone who wished our services would do the Black Sacrament, Sithis would hear, tell the Night Mother who would convey Sithis' wishes to the Listener," Nazir replied, not used to speaking so much.

"Where is Night Mother and...Keeper? Listener?"

"There has been no Night Mother, Keeper, or Listener for a long time now. We are now hired out."

"And these people are all bad that I will kill?" the girl asked, her blue eyes more curious than appalled.

"Not always, Mari. Some are good people. We have a job to do, and we are not to ask questions, but I, myself, try to take the bad, the evil. I do refuse, at times, to kill an innocent for reasons that are my own."

"You almost killed me," she said, not offended, but merely stating the fact.

"Indeed, but I did not. I do not like killing children."

"But you have before…" Mari said, leaving her words there like a bread crumb.

"I have," Nazir answered, offering her no more.

Mari thought about what Nazir was telling her. Deep down, she knew her mother would be displeased for her choosing this particular road, the morality of it all was dubious. She was old enough to know that, but she also had nowhere else to go, and she strangely liked the Redguard watching her silently. 

"I...I think Mama would not be happy with me," Mari said, looking down at her stew, feeling the first pangs of guilt since her mother died, showing how young she really was.

"I am not going to lie to you, but she may not. Being an assassin is not always honorable, but sometimes it is a necessity. Assassinations have prevented wars from happening. We have prevented Kings from being usurped, or have usurped thrones for the good of the whole. We pull the threads of others to guide them in a certain direction that is one more beneficial. We have killed tyrants, and sometimes we instill chaos. It is not always moral, as your mother would want, but it is a necessary evil if you will."

"It sounds like something Mephala would say."

Nazir nodded in understanding, wondering if Mephala forced the two to cross paths and bring Mari to the Dark Brotherhood, knowing the Daedric Prince manipulated and pulled at the strings of fate, one who was closely tied to the Dark Brotherhood. Surely the creature would control her own daughter.

"Yes, I do wonder if she has her spider legs in your fate."

"Do you think I have a choice in my life or that Mephala controls it?" the girls asked thoughtfully, almost in disappointment.

"I do not have the answer for you, child. Deep down, I believe we can control our fates or destinies. I find it hard to believe we have no will or choices."

Mari yawned, trying to cover her mouth, suddenly tired from the long ride and having a belly full of food, the conversation complex. "I am tired now."

"I can see that. Let us be off to bed then. We have a room with two beds."

The girl looked up at the man, appearing to be excited. "I have a bed of my own?"

"Yes."

She had previously shared a bed with her mother. Mari never minded, loving her mother's warmth and smell, but it would be nice to have a bed of her own.

Mari watched the dark skin man unravel his headscarf, exposing long tendrils of thick hair as if black snakes lived on his head as they spilled down over his broad shoulders. She had never seen hair like his, though she had seen Redguards in Riften before as they traveled through. The girl continued to stare as he poured water from the pitcher to the small basin, washing the dust from traveling off his hands and face, then crawl into bed on his back, hands clasped over his stomach.

As she listened to him snore lightly soon after, she struggled to sleep. Digging in her bag, she pulled out her old and worn doll. It was something her mother made for her years ago from an old dress she could no longer wear. Holding it tight to her, she felt childish, but it was the only thing she had that was close to her mother. 

Nazir was sleeping on his side when he was startled awake to someone crawling in his bed. As the sleepy fog cleared his mind, he realized it was the girl. Looking behind him, he was going to inform her that she had previously been excited to have her own bed but realized she probably wasn't used to sleeping alone. Shrugging, he rolled back over and went back to sleep with the girl pressed up against him for comfort.

The next morning, Mari tried to climb out of bed silently, so Nazir didn't know she was in it, but he was already awake. "There is no point in being silent. You woke me when you came to my bed."

Mari had the grace to look embarrassed, blushing prettily. "I'm sorry...I thought I would like having my own bed, but it was strange," she explained honestly, tucking her doll back into her bag.

"It is fine. I cannot allow it in the Sanctuary, your new home. You must learn to sleep alone like all children."

"I will," she promised.

"You should already have learned. Why did your mother not let you learn?" Nazir asked.

Mari could feel herself bristle, not liking anyone criticizing her mother, who did her best. "My mother was poor! We only had one bed, and it was either share or sleep on the floor! She loved me too much for that!" the girl yelled, hands on her hips.

Nazir bowed in his, "I apologize. I was wrong to say such things. Your mother was a good woman to you."

"She was."

The man watched the girl as she controlled herself with great willpower to stop herself from crying. Her eyes filled with wetness from her anger but quickly dried as she forced herself to not weep.

After breakfast, Nazir and Mari got back on a well-rested Frigga and made their way to the forests of Falkreath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: A new home and a new family.


	4. Brothers and Sisters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari continues her journey with Nazir and she gets her own horse, she meets her new family, some nicer than others, and discovers a boy in the next village likes her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let us know what you think in the comments below <3

"This is Falkreath," Nazir informed the girl, guiding Frigga through the dense forest. "We should be at the Sanctuary by tomorrow night."

Mari adjusted in the saddle, her bottom had been getting sore, not used to leather digging into bone and flesh but she never complained. The teen looked around the dense and dark forest, barely able to see the mountains dividing Skyrim and Cyrodill. The trees were very old, thick with age, giving the forest a strange sense of mystery and foreboding, yet she drew comfort from its beauty. Some sections of the woods were so packed with old trees, the light of Mundus barely reached them as they rode on. Falkreath was nothing like Riften with its yellow and orange birch trees as far as the eye could see, the warm colors always offering happiness even if life did not.

"I like it," was all she said. "Will we have a place to stay tonight?"

"We will camp. The town of Falkreath is close to home, and we have already passed Helgen. There are no other places to stay."

Mari nodded in understanding. "Can I steer Frigga?" she asked, finally getting the nerve to do so.

"I will steer."

"Why? Even for a little bit? If he is to be mine, shouldn't I know how to ride him?"

Nazir just wanted to get home without further delay, but the girl was right. If the horse was to be hers, he should teach her at least a little bit. "Very well," he said, handing her the reins. "There is not much to do as we walk, and that is all we do, understand?"

"Yes," she replied, taking the reins from the man.

"Just hold them loosely as you have seen me do. If the horse decides he wants to eat, you pull up the reins like this, but not too hard, or else he will walk backward. If you want to turn left or right, just move the reins to the side you want to turn, gently, and he will do as he is led...no, do not yank. He has a bit in his mouth, and there is no need for force except when he's eating. Use the heels of your feet to spur him to move faster if he slows down too much."

Because Mari did an excellent job learning to steer Frigga, Nazir allowed her to do so the rest of the way until they reached a place to rest for the night.

Once it became dark, Nazir set up camp as Mari led Frigga to some water in the stream close by, running her hands along his soft and sleek neck. When he was done being watered, she tied him to a tree as he munched on the green grass.

"Are there teachers in the Sanctuary?" she asked, eating some jerked beef for dinner and an apple.

"I will be your teacher for most of your training. I cannot teach you magic, for I have none. You will be taught by Festus in those abilities. He is mean but effective."

Mari was pleased it would be Nazir who would teach her most of what she had to know. She had come to enjoy his company though he didn't talk much. He didn't have to. She had already grown to trust him. Despite what he did for a living, he was kind to her, patient. He took her in, not leaving her alone, to give her a home when he didn't have to.

"What will you teach me?" she asked as she curled up on her bedroll by the fire.

"Many things. You will learn archery, daggers, swords, stealth, and hand-to-hand combat. I will teach you all. Astrid will not tolerate any less from me since I am taking you in."

"Will she like me?"

"It does not matter."

It did matter to her, though, the idea made her feel alone. If she were to have a new home and family, she wanted to feel connected with the people she would be living with, not have them come to hate her. "It does matter," she replied, rolling over to sleep.

_I suppose it does to you, little one_ , he thought, watching the girl go to sleep. Deep down, he too hoped Astrid would like the girl. The leader of the Dark Brotherhood could be harsh and cold. Despite her poverty, the girl had been surrounded by love, and she should be used to those who shunned her as they did to the poor. Nazir wasn't sure what he was going to do if Astrid refused the girl. It was an internal struggle the whole ride home, a struggle to ignore the girl and let her go on her way to fend for herself. Or to defy Astrid, something he had never done, and go with the girl. He wanted to do neither, having no definitive answers.

The next evening they passed the large town of Falkreath, and Mari was eager to explore the large village. It was well kept, but the feeling she got from it was dark, unsure why. Closing her eyes, she let the town pull her in, allowing it to seep through her pores. "There are many dead there," she said to the Redguard.

Nazir grunted in acknowledgment, "Yes."

"Will I be able to visit?"

"If you wish."

Nazir took the reins from Mari and steered Frigga down a rocky slope to a small pond, dark as night. "We are here," he informed the girl.

"There is nothing here," Mari observed.

"Look closer."

That was when she saw it, a dark door tucked away into the cliffside. As they approached it, Mari saw it was covered in disturbing carvings, a giant skull centered on the door with a red hand imprinted on the forehead. Reaching out, the sense of foreboding and fear filled her, instilling a fear deep inside.

"I am afraid," she said.

"You are supposed to be. It is a spell to keep out those who are not a part of the Dark Brotherhood."

Nodding, she took a few steps towards the door, and as soon as she approached, the door talked to her, taking a step back right into Nazir in surprise. He gently pushed her forward as the door talked once more.

" _What is the music of life_ ," said the voice, a mere whisper and foreboding.

"Silence, my brother," Nazir responded.

" _Welcome...home_."

The Redguard pushed the door open and guided Mari inside. "We will meet Astrid, and it is still early enough to have some dinner."

The Sanctuary was a well-furnished cave. For some reason, Mari had expected a house or building, but she supposed a hidden cave made more sense. The stairway opened up to what appeared to be an office and a bedroom off to the side. A woman in tight leather armor of red and black leaned over a table covered in a large map, her long blonde hair spilling over a shoulder. 

"It's about time you made it back, Nazir," she said, not looking up, her voice deep, seductive, slow as if every word had a purpose, a meaning. "Get lost, did we?"

"I was...sidetracked," was all he offered.

The blonde woman looked over to see the Redguard and a teen girl. If she was surprised, she gave no indication. "Brought home a little pet, did you?"

"This is Marianne. I would like her to be part of our family and train her," he said, nodding in respect to his leader.

"I have no need for a child assassin," Astrid said, waving a hand in dismissal, going back to her map.

Nazir had hoped Astrid would reconsider, and now he would have to explain further, push Astrid into changing her mind, not ready to send the girl out in the world alone without trying.

"She needs training, but she will be superior as an assassin. I have seen her work firsthand. She could possibly be the best we have seen in a long time, Astrid. Mari is the daughter of Mephala."

That piqued Astrid's interest, looking at the blonde girl before her, nearly as tall as Astrid already and still growing by the looks of it. "Mephala? How could you possibly know this, Nazir? You wouldn't try to con your leader, would you?"

"I never lie to you," he responded. "She can prove it."

Astrid contemplated for a moment, her eyes never wavering from the girl, and the girl never once looked away, knowing it would convey weakness to the Nord leader.

"Very well, prove it to me, dearest child."

Mari stepped closer to Astrid until she was face to face and reached with both hands placing them on either side of the woman's head. The girl's eyes rolled back to the whites as she gave Astrid all that she knew of Mephala, her powers, her story. It was easier that way instead of explaining, and the girl knew well enough that conjuring a spider wouldn't prove anything to the skeptical. Her instincts told her it would have been a grave mistake to cast a spell on Astrid as she did on Nazir when she first met him, proving her powers.

Mari stepped back when she was finished as the two stared at each other, but a strange look came over Astrid as her blue eyes, nearly as blue as Mari's, showed an understanding, a belief in who the girl was. "You can keep your little pet for now, but you train her, Nazir," she acquiesced.

"Thank you, Astrid."

"I'm not a pet, not his or anyone's," Mari finally spoke, annoyed to be treated like a dog.

Astrid smirked at the girl with the respect that she could stand up to herself, but she wouldn't tolerate disrespect either. "Good, you are strong but don't mistake my respect for appreciation. You will do as you're told. But this is your family now, our family, my dearest. Our Family. Together, united as one, the Dark Brotherhood can accomplish anything. Is that understood?"

"Yes."

"Nazir will train you, and when you're ready for work, he will give you the necessary assignments to further progress your training. You are now his responsibility. If you fail, you not only fail him, but he fails the Dark Brotherhood."

"I understand and will not let you down or Nazir."

"Good, on your way then, and go find something to eat. We will need to fatten you up a bit."

Nazir masked his relief, glad the girl convinced Astrid to let her stay. Mari would be a great asset to the Dark Brotherhood family, not to mention he felt responsible for the girl, bonded to her. "We should introduce you to everyone before we eat."

Mari nodded, ignoring the rumblings in her stomach, used to being hungry. "Are there a lot of you?" 

"Not many, but we are enough."

The first person they came across was an immense Nord with flowing long white hair and pale eyes. He wore the same leather armor as Astrid, realizing they were uniforms. He was hammering away on a sword barefoot.

"Arnbjorn, this is our newest recruit, Mari."

The man put down his hammer on the anvil and looked the girl up and down, scoffing. "I'll give you a week before you end up dead in a ditch."

Nazir could sense some electricity pool in the air, the hairs on his arm and neck standing on end, and the ozone's smell hitting his nostrils. When he looked down, he could see the whites of Mari's eyes, knowing she was about to cast a spell. The man didn't know what she was about to cast, but it couldn't be good as it was directed at Arnbjorn. "Mari," he said, placing a gentle arm on her shoulder. "Enough."

Mari quickly recovered, looking up at the large Redguard and grabbed his hand, needing a familiar sense. So far, his family has proved cold and dysfunctional, and she didn't like it in the least.

"Arnbjorn, was that necessary?" Nazir scolded the Nord.

"It's the truth."

Nazir shook his head in irritation and let it go knowing that the Nord would eventually warm up to the girl. "He is a werewolf and quite temperamental, he is also the husband of Astrid. Try not to take what he said to heart. It may be his truth, but it is not yours or mine," he explained to the teen. "Come, let's meet the others."

As they walked up the stairs to the kitchen, Mari could see several people eating their meal at the communal table. Still holding Nazir's hand, they walked up to the group, her eyes now wary, unsure what to expect from her new family.

"Ah, good, you are all here. This will make introductions easier. Everyone, this is Mari, our newest recruit."

The Dunmer scrutinized the girl then addressed Nazir. "What are you thinking? Bringing such a young girl here. We don't recruit children, Nazir."

"I was eighteen when I came to the family," he informed Gabriella.

"Still an adult and still older than this girl."

"There is a child right there," Mari pointed out to the little girl not more than ten Winters eating something that looked nearly like bloody soup.

"I am Babette and am over three hundred Winters. I'm a Vampire child. Technically, I'm the oldest one here."

"Oh…"

The Vampire girl stood up and took Mari into an embrace. "You are welcome, child. You're going to love it here. We have a lot of fun, and we look out for each other. Just like any family."

For the first time since her arrival at the Sanctuary, Mari gave a small smile to the Vampire in appreciation of her warm welcome. She knew from that point on they would become great friends, not afraid of the young girl, or woman, or whatever she was.

"You still didn't answer my question, Nazir," Gabriella said. 

"She is Mephala's daughter."

The group gasped at the revelation, some with wary eyes, others with admiration. None questioned what Nazir said as he was not known for exaggeration or lies. 

"Mephala? We worship her in Morrowind," the Dunmer informed the girl. "I...I can scarcely believe it. Yes, you certainly have strange energy about you. I look forward to following your progress."

"Thank you," the teen said, nodding her head.

"I'm Veezara," informed the Argonian. "Welcome, sister. Welcome to our Sanctuary. You have made the right choice, joining us, I assure you. Just trust in Astrid, follow orders, and you'll do fine here."

An old man stood up, dumping his dishes on a counter, not taking his eyes off Mari and she wondered how the man was still alive, he was so old. 

"Consider me the cranky old uncle nobody talks to. You go your way, I'll go mine," Festus explained, walking away.

"Not so fast, Festus," Nazir spoke up, stopping the old man. "You are to help her with her magic, to hone her power."

"I will do no such thing," the old man huffed.

"You will. You are the only one who has the power and knowledge to do so, being the most skilled at magic," Nazir said, stroking the old man's ego.

"Well, you have me there… What can the girl do?"

"Magics, not even you have seen."

"I doubt that, but fine, I will see what she can do then decide from there."

"That is all I ask," the Redguard said, giving a slight bow of his head.

When introductions were complete, everyone left to do their own thing, leaving Mari and Nazir alone. He sat her down as he gathered food for the girl. "We all take turns cooking and maintaining the Sanctuary. You will learn and do your part, is that understood?"

"Yes."

"After your meal, there is one more you should meet."

Mari should be grateful to the Redguard man for taking her in, but she wasn't sure how much she was going to like being part of the Dark Brotherhood. Most of its members were cold, some cruel, but what did she expect for a bunch of assassins. She soon felt lonely, despite all the people. "I don't want to meet anyone else today. I...I…" She couldn't finish her words, not wanting to appear ungrateful.

But Nazir understood this girl. She was in a new land, a new home with strangers, some of whom were not kind to her. He knew they would warm up to the girl, but he understood her reluctance to meet others. He was strangely bonded to her, related to her. "You will like this one, I think," he said, chuckling, taking no offense.

After their meal, he took her to Gabriella's room, who was sitting in a chair reading a book. Instead of talking to the Dunmer, Nazir introduced Mari to Lis, a tamed Frostbite Spider. For the first time, Mari had entered the Sanctuary, a broad smile appeared on her face as she reached for the spider.

"Careful, she may hurt you...slowly," Gabriella informed her.

"She won't hurt me," Mari promised and sat down, petting the spider who snuggled up to the girl. "Hi, Lis, I'm Mari."

Gabriella cocked a black eyebrow at the quick connection the teen made with her beloved pet. "I should have known the daughter of Mephala would love spiders, and they would love her."

"I can conjure giant ones when I need to."

"Indeed? Now that I will have to see for myself."

"Later," Nazir said, walking out with Mari following close behind.

The Redguard took her to an unused room that was to be all hers. It was small with a bed, dresser, and chair, but she could do whatever she wanted with it, making it her own. "Remember, you are to learn to sleep alone. It is time you grew up." Nazir left her behind to go to his private room to sleep, leaving her to deal with everything alone, to process all she had been through that day.

Mari reluctantly closed her bedroom door, unpacked her meager belongings, and sat on her bed, holding her doll close to her, trying not to cry, feeling utterly alone. She stiffened and wiped away a stray tear that managed to escape when she heard someone knock on her door. Opening it, she saw Astrid holding something out to her.

"Here, this used to be mine. You are nearly the same size as me, so it should fit well enough," she said, handing Mari the bundle.

"Thank you."

"Well, we can't have you walking around in a torn dress too small for you."

After Astrid left, Mari closed her door once more and opened up the bundle to find the same leather armor everyone was wearing. Placing it on her dresser, she climbed into the soft bed, holding her doll close. She tossed and turned for a long while, resisting the strong urge to crawl into Nazir's bed. The only thing that stopped her was his ire at her disobeying him. Finally, she drifted off to sleep with dreams of playing in a garden of webs with her spiderling friends.

For her sixteenth Name-Day, Mari was allowed to visit the town of Falkreath alone. Usually, Nazir would go with her, or Babette, but she was allowed to be by herself this time. The girl needed the time alone, always surrounded by her adopted family. With a pocket full of Septim Nazir gave her for the occasion and putting on her best dress, she took Frigga to the town, though she was close enough to walk, but wanted the stallion to have a bit of exercise. The day was balmy, leaving her cloak off as she rode the short trip into town. 

Stabling Frigga, she walked to Gray Pine Goods to shop. Inside was a suspicious Nord who watched her warily, probably afraid she would steal from him. Her feet were growing, so she bought a new pair of leather boots, spending quite a bit on the leather's suppleness, lined with rabbit fur. Though they were expensive, she knew they would last her a long time as long as her feet didn't grow anymore.

Mari also bought an Amulet of Julianos, enchanted to enhance her magic, anything to make her stronger. She was nearly as good as Festus in destruction magic, but she wanted to be stronger, to prove to him she could be better than the old man. Festus never rewarded her, praised her, when she showed him all the spells she could cast that he could not. His ego got in the way, and it continued to infuriate her, wanting some sort of acknowledgment for her power, but he was not that sort of teacher.

But Nazir was different. After two years of training with him in a variety of weaponry, she had become quite skilled in combat. He also taught her physical combat, a fighting technique common to Redguards, who were true warriors. Mari learned to use all of her body to fight, even to play dirty. The enemy wouldn't be kind to her, so she couldn't be kind either. Martial training was her favorite despite walking away, bruised most of the time. Her bond with Nazir was strong, listening and learning quickly from him, unable to prevent developing a little crush on the man, though she never did anything about it being six years younger than him.

As the girl meandered her way to Dead Man's Drink for lunch, she didn't notice the teen boy watching her as she passed through town. He had seen her a few times with either a younger girl in the evenings or a large Redguard, her protector, it would seem. About his age, the teen girl was so beautiful, prettier than any other girl in Falkreath. Every time he saw her, he wanted to talk to her, kiss her. Since she was alone, today would be that day.

When Kjen got the nerve to walk into Dead Man's Drink, he saw her in a far corner reading a book, shoving bits of cheese in her mouth. Struggling, yet failing, to control the butterflies in his stomach, he took a deep breath and slowly walked towards her. It was as if she could sense he was there, for she turned to look up at him, smiling. His stomach nearly bottomed out when she smiled, lighting up her face, her eyes so blue almost like an ocean he had never been to but heard of its beautiful colors. Her blonde hair was down, draping over her shoulders, lightly falling into her face as if to intentionally taunt the boy.

He swallowed so hard from nerves that he was afraid she could hear it, but he nonetheless pushed on. "H...hi," he managed to get out, voice squeaking a little as he berated himself internally.

"Hi," she replied, the slight smile never leaving her lips.

"I...I…" he coughed to get it out. "Sorry, uhm, I'm Kjen."

"Mari."

"Hi," he said again, lamely.

"You said that already."

"Uhm, sorry. I have seen you before, and I finally got the courage to say so," he admitted.

Mari blushed prettily, never having a boy interested in her before. When she was younger, there were plenty of boys in Riften, but she was thin, gainly, face a bit gaunt from malnourishment. Now that she was older and well-fed, she had blossomed, filling out in delicate curves, her face bit more full with high cheekbones.

"That is very brave of you," she offered.

Kjen seemed to relax a bit at that, smiling back. "Can I sit with you?"

Mari nodded as the boy sat next to her, unable to take his eyes off of her. He too had blue eyes, but they were grayer, and his blonde hair was much darker than hers, typical for a Nord. He was quite handsome, she had to admit, flattered that he would find her interesting enough to want to talk to her.

"I have wanted to kiss you for a while now," he blurted, causing both the flush apple red. "I...I'm sorry, I shouldn't…"

Despite her embarrassment, Mari just giggled. "I would like that," she replied, still blushing, the whole idea of having her first kiss pleased her to no end.

Once again, the girl put him at ease, boosting his confidence levels tenfold. "Me too…" he said, leaning in, but the girl pushed him away, giggling.

"Not here," she informed him, looking around to see if people were staring. "Behind the smithy."

Kjen just nodded dumbly, butterflies turning into dragons in his stomach in anticipation of his own first kiss. He watched the pretty blonde girl stand and walk out of the tavern, looking back at him coyly for him to follow, and follow he did, eagerly.

The two teens snuck behind the smithy, listening to the ringing of a hammer to anvil, metal against metal, as Mari leaned against the wooden walls, arms tucked behind her back, feeling nervous yet excited. She enjoyed the intense beating of her heart, rarely did it ever accelerate unless she was in physical training. The heat creeping up her neck to her face and ears didn't bother her, enjoying the new sensations and emotions.

The boy, being as clueless as she, just pressed his lips to hers, not touching anything else—lips against lips, unmoving, uncertain what else to do. 

"Is that it?" she asked when he pulled away. 

"I don't know," Kjen shrugged. "Did you like it?"

"I guess…"

Not to be deterred, he tried again, trying to remember how other people did it when he saw them kissing. This time, lips opened a bit, heads angled, tongues tentatively touched. Forehead to forehead, their lips parted, panting as if out of breath, both giggling.

"Yes, I liked that," she said.

"I did too."

Emboldened, the boy pressed his lips to Mari's once more, a bit more heat added as his hand roamed her body, up her torso, and boldly touched her developed breasts. Something burned inside of Mari between her legs, fueling, but she pushed him away, stopping his touches from progressing.

"What…?"

"I have to go," she said.

"But we just started," Kjen complained, wanting more of the girl.

"I can come back."

"When?"

"Soon," Mari smiled at him, waving. "I promise."

Blowing the boy a kiss, she walked off, a broad smile planted on her face, trying not to skip to the stables knowing he was watching her. _Stay calm, Mari_ , she told herself. _Don't let him think you're too eager_. Her entire ride home was filled with heated thoughts of her first kiss, touching her lips, looking forward to seeking Kjen again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Jealousies, training, and first jobs.


	5. Learning Boundaries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nazir continues training Mari and soon discovers something he doesn't like about himself that disrupts the bond he has with her. At 18, Mari goes on her first mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let us know what you think down in the comments <3

Mari dove out from under the swing kick aimed for her head. Low on the ground, she kicked out his legs from under him, hearing the wind knock out of him as he landed on his back with a loud _Oof_. Before she had a chance to pin him down, Nazir flung his legs out, the force pulling his body upward and back into his defensive stance. Soon he was on the offensive as he threw rapid punches and kicks towards Mari, forcing her to block each one lest she get hit. As soon as she saw an opening, she kicked out with her long leg directly at his ribs. While it was painful, he caught her foot, forcing her to hobble, but that didn't stop her as she swung her body and her other leg, foot aiming for his head, forcing him to let her go before he was knocked out, blocking it.

"Enough," he panted, walking over to the table to grab a towel and wipe off the sweat from his face. "Well done. You are getting quite proficient at fighting, fast."

"Thanks to you and your teachings."

Bruised and sore as she usually was when she sparred with Nazir, she tried not to hobble over to her water, chugging thirstily. "Urgh, you didn't hold back today...my arms must be covered in bruises." Sitting down on the chair, she too wiped the sweat off her face.

"Your enemy will never hold back, Mari. They won't care if you're a female, smaller, or a young girl."

Nodding in understanding, she drank more water, then cast a weak healing spell on her body, which was all she could do, but they were only bruises. "I’m not a young girl. Want me to cast on you?" she offered.

"I am fine, and yes, you are a young girl still."

"It's not less manly to have pain removed," she teased.

"I said, I am fine," his dark eyes making it clear she shouldn't ask again.

"OK, OK…"

"What are your plans today, now that you are free?" the Redguard asked, looking at her strangely when he saw her face flush. "Mari…"

"What?"

"Why the sudden embarrassment? What are you up to?"

"I'm not 'up to' anything. I…" she smiled through her blush, standing to sit next to Nazir, giggling. "It's a boy. His name is Kjen, a Nord. He's so handsome! He gave me my first kiss, and it was perfect! I have seen him a few times since then, and he's so nice too, sweet, bringing me wildflowers every time we meet. He’s so romantic!"

Nazir felt strange with that bit of unexpected news, but not in a good way, like a weird pang in the pit of his stomach. He couldn't explain it if someone asked what he was feeling at that very moment. All he knew was he wanted to stop whatever she was doing with that boy before they got too deep. She shouldn't be involved in a boy anyway. She had training to do, training to be an assassin. Assassins and boys do not mix.

"I see," was all he gave her, trying to not show...whatever it was he was feeling. If he was honest with himself, it was because they shared a special bond, and he didn't want anyone else to share that with her. 

"That's it? ‘I see?' Fine, I guess it was silly to talk about this with a man, Mr. Stoic Redguard. I will go find Babette instead," Mari huffed off.

Nazir didn't understand teen girls, but he understood Mari, related to her. He remembered his own first kiss, it seemed so long ago, but was it really? He wasn't much older than Mari at the time, and he was only six years older than her now. For some reason, he grew frustrated and went to bathe the sweat off, and...whatever it was he was feeling.

Some weeks later, Mari ran out of the Sanctuary, heading to Falkreath in her best dress. It was early evening, and she didn't want to be late for the party, her first party. Running, trying not to dirty her dress, she went to meet Kjen, who had invited her to the celebration, an annual festival for celebrating the bounty of growth and food before Winter started. There would be dancing, food, and, hopefully, more kissing. The teen didn't tell anyone where she was going because she knew they would not allow it. It was one thing to go into town for a bit and shop, quite another for an assassin in training to hang out with the locals, not entirely trusting her to not let something slip if she drank too much.

Kjen leaned against a pillar by the opened gates to the city, arms folded, the look on his face nearly stopped her in her tracks. Strolling towards the boy, she gently touched his arm, asking what was wrong. He struggled with the tears, but he choked them back, shrugging her hand off. 

"Please, Kjen. What's happened?"

"I...I can't see you anymore, Mari," the boys said, lip quivering.

"W...what do you mean?"

Suddenly angry, he directed his ire towards her. "That fucking Redguard friend of yours said it is not allowed!"

"What? I don't understand." The girl was confused, not comprehending why Nazir would put a stop to her and the boy. She wanted to go to the party with Kjen, dance, kiss…

"Don't you get it! He told me if I didn't break things off with you, he would...break me."

Mari's blue eyes flashed in anger, brows furrowed as her hands clenched in tight fists at her side. "Tell me exactly what he said!"

Kjen looked at her then and softened, "You don't know then? I...I thought you told him to tell me, threaten me."

"Why would I do such a thing? Kjen, I am quite capable of handling that myself if I didn't want to see you anymore!"

The boy nodded, believing her, "OK, well... that's something, at least. I...regardless, we can't see each other anymore. I'm sorry, Mari." Kjen let a tear slip and walked off, his pace slow and dejected, not looking back at the pretty girl he had grown to like.

It had been some years since Mari had felt this enraged. Her fists never unclenched as she rushed back to have a word with Nazir, the source of her ire. 

" _What is the music of life_ ," the door whispered as she returned.

"Open the fucking door, you stupid...door!" Mari yelled, kicking it.

" _What is the music of life_ ," it repeated.

"Urgh! Silence, my brother!"

The door opened, and Mari blasted by Astrid, ignoring the woman and headed straight to Nazir's private room, entering it without knocking. He was sitting on his bed, reading a book when the girl stormed in.

"You!" Mari screamed at the shocked Redguard. "Why?!" In her dress, she swung at him as he sat up, but he blocked her and grabbed her arm. She took another swing at him with her other hand, but he caught that too. In one swift movement, he was standing, spinning her around, arms wrapped around her, and her back pressed up against him. 

Mari squirmed to get out of the body lock he had her in, unable to cast any spells. "Let me fucking go!"

"Calm down."

"No! You ruined everything!" she yelled, her anger soon turned into sobs.

"You must calm down and tell me what I have done."

"I liked him! He was nice and a good kisser! Why? Why did you tell him to stop? Why did you threaten him?"

"I am protecting you," he said. _Lies_.

"Protecting me? Protecting me or protecting your ego?!" she scoffed.

Nazir felt the sting of her words, hurting to know the truth of them. He was bonded to her, and he was jealous of her bonding with someone else. She was a part of him, and she was him. They were close, and it felt strange for him to see and hear about her with another. It wasn't a sexual thing he felt towards her, just that their bond was unique, and he didn't want anyone else to have it, to share it. 

Letting her go, he sat back down, rubbing his hands through his thick and coarse locks. "You are right. I am sorry."

Mari turned around to see the truth, the guilt in his eyes. "Why?" she whispered, tears still spilling.

"You are special to me, Mari. We have a bond…"

"I know we do. Do you think me incapable of having more than one bond?"

"He wasn't good enough for you."

"That is not for you to decide!"

Nazir nodded, agreeing with her. He wasn't used to these feelings and being closely connected to someone. The last time he had, she died. "You are right. That was not for me to decide. You may go to him and tell him I will allow it."

"Allow it?" she huffed. "It's too late! He is too afraid! I felt his fear."

"I am sorry, Mari." What a strange turn of events that a teen girl could behave more rational and intelligently than him, who was older. "If it is any consolation, there will be other boys. You are a smart and beautiful girl."

Mari sat next to the Redguard on his bed, wiping the drying tears off her face. "I forgive you," she sighed, unable to stay mad at him, leaning a head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around her. "You are a scary man. Just...please stay out of my love life next time?"

"I swear to you."

"Good."

"You must also swear to me that you will not sneak out again."

"Fine," she huffed once more. "I swear it."

But it didn't matter, any of it. Word quickly spread around the town of the threat to any boys getting near Mari, and none of them would ever approach her again.

Mari was eighteen Winters and ready for her first assignment. After training for four years, she was more than ready. Festus and Nazir had taught the girl all they knew. She knew how to make poisons, cast spells, be invisible, stealth-like, use several weapons, and could fight hand-to-hand should she find herself having no weapons. More advanced training consisted of being persuasive, especially towards the opposite sex, manipulation.

"Mari, get suited up and meet me in my room as soon as you can. I have a job for you," Nazir ordered as she was eating breakfast.

"Finally!"

"Good luck," she could hear her family tell her.

Mari rushed to her room and put on her red and black leather armor, stuffing her mask and hood in her bag, then ran to Nazir's room, eager to finally put all her training to use. "You have a job for me?"

Nazir looked up and tried not to cough and look away. Mari usually wore dresses around, and he wasn't used to seeing the woman she had become, the armor fitting her perfectly. Struggling to not look at the cleavage, not having the armor strapped up, he only focused on her eyes, hoping she didn't notice his glances.

"Uhm, yes, here," he said, handing her a scroll. "This should be a simple hit, quick. Do it, get the payment, and return back to report."

Mari read the missive. A woman named Beitlid, a Nord and mind owner in Dawnstar. Apparently, the miners pulled together their resources for payment to get rid of the woman, who had been working them ragged, not caring if they were sick or dying. It seems her husband, owner of another mine, got involved as well. Beitlid had been competing with him, and the result was the abuse of her miners. She was brutal in her treatments, and it was time for her to go. "Sounds like she deserves it."

"Yes, but do not get too sidetracked in morality. We were hired to do this job. It is a simple hit, so you should not have any problems. This is your first test, so please do not disappoint me or let me down. It is also my neck riding on this since I took you under my wing. I too am being tested."

"I won't...I swear it!"

Mari walked off before he called her back once more. "Mari…"

"What...I have to go."

"Just remember your training. This is the first person you will have killed since that night we met. It will be different as you are not full of grief and rage. It will not be as easy as you think. Do not forget that."

She looked at Nazir thoughtfully, understanding what he was telling her. "I won't forget. I think I'm ready."

"Very well, and...please be careful."

Nazir never told anyone to be careful, just issued orders, but he was bound to the girl, perhaps more so as time went on. He worried about her wellbeing all too frequently, more than he was comfortable with.

Mari turned, smiled, and embraced him, realizing it would be the longest time she had been away in four years. Pecking him on the cheek, she ran off, tossing her bag on her back. 

"Be careful," he whispered once more.

"It's about time my investment has paid off," said Astrid as Mari was walking out.

"I haven't been paid yet," the girl quipped.

"Yes, let's make sure you do. If you do well, there will be more jobs in it for you. If not, well, you know what happens."

Mari ignored the leader and her threats, confident in her abilities. She grabbed Frigga from his stable she and Nazir had built for him a few years ago, saddled him, and hopped on heading North to Dawnstar. The girl had never been there, and it was the farthest she had ever traveled alone. Pulling out her map, she charted her route, paying attention to landmarks. She folded up her map, stuffed it in her back, and headed North at a trot.

It was evening when Mari reached Rorikstead, stopping there for the night and to stock up on necessary supplies and food. It was a quaint little town that seemed to have a thriving farming community in such rocky terrain. Frost Fruit Inn was quiet when Mari entered, quiet that was except for the arguing father and son.

"Father, how old were you when you left home?"

"I know where this is going, son. As I've said many times, the world is a dangerous place. You're much safer here at the farm with me."

"But I don't want to be safe! I'm not afraid of the dangers out there. The only thing I'm afraid of is wasting my life on this farm."

"Yes, that's your mother's side of the family talking. Just stay on for one more season, that's all I ask..."

Mari coughed to get their attention, "Sorry to interrupt, but I need to rent a room for the night and order some dinner."

"We have some roasted chicken with potatoes and carrots, or beef stew and fresh bread," said the boy not much older than she was.

"Uhm, the chicken, with a bottle of Honningbrew."

"That will be 65 Septim for the room and dinner," said the innkeeper, and apparently father.

Paying the man, she grabbed her drink and sat to wait for dinner. Erik watched the pretty blonde pay for her room and food and sit down. Her eyes were so lovely, like the Summer sky when there wasn't any humidity. If she could travel alone, why couldn't he?

Pulling out a book, Mari started to read, but it wasn't long before she was interrupted.

"You look like you've seen your share of adventure. I envy you that, friend. In fact, maybe you can help me with something." 

"Do I look that old and battered to you?" Mari huffed, seeing the red-headed boy look at her earnestly.

"What?"

"How do I look like an adventurer? I'm not much older than you are."

"Oh, I meant, uhm, well," the boy rubbed the back of his nervously, not expecting to be put on the spot like that.

"Well, out with it?"

"No, no...I...I was just hoping, was all, guessing. It was a conversation starter, ya know? I...I meant no offense."

Mari eased up on the pressure, "Well...good then. I thought I was still too young to look old enough to be experienced."

"No! You are quite lovely, indeed! I...I mean…" soon, the boy was blushing as brightly as his hair. "Can I start over?"

Mari finally laughed at the poor boy's discomfort, "By all means."

The boy blew out a sigh in relief, "Sorry, I was wondering if you could help me with something. We don't get many people around here, so I have to take my chances when someone comes in."

"What is it you need? If you tell me, I can only promise I will think about it."

"I want to be an adventurer like you, but my father says I can't. He says that he needs me to stay here and work the farm, and even if he did let me be an adventurer, we couldn't afford to buy armor. His name's Mralki, and he's the innkeeper here. I hope you can change his mind."

"What makes you think your father would even listen to a young girl?" Mari scoffed.

"You aren't so young that you don't need some chaperone."

"True, but I'm going to be honest with you, take it from someone who knows. Stick to farming, boy, stay with your father. He won't be around forever, and you will miss him deeply. It's been four years, and I miss my mother every day, wishing I was still with her despite not having much of a life. I would have stayed going nowhere just to have another moment with her."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I just want to do something different with my life, you know?"

Mari nodded, understanding, "I do know, but trust me, it is dangerous out there, at least wait a few more years."

"Erik! Stop bothering the customers!" the innkeeper shouted.

"I gotta go, but if you change your mind, I would appreciate it. I'm Erik, by the way," the boy said, brushing back long bangs from his face as he stood.

"I heard your father yell it out. I'm Mari. Good luck, Erik."

Her food arrived just in time as the boy left, and she resumed her reading. 

The ground was covered in a fresh blanket of snow that came in from the night before. It was bright out, but the wind was blustery as she and Frigga trotted into the shipping town of Dawnstar. She wrapped her cloak tightly around her, but she wasn't sure if it was because of the cold or the eerie feel of the village. The people of Dawnstar were walking in and out of the town as if they hadn't slept in weeks, dark circles under their eyes, their movements slow. Remembering not to get distracted, she tied Frigga to a tree just outside of town if she needed a quick getaway, giving him a quick brush and a carrot. 

Mari made sure all her weapons were where they should be, had all the necessary supplies for contingencies. _Always be prepared_ , Nazir hammered into her head daily. With her mask on and hood up to hide her identity, Mari started walking, head down towards the mines. It was the Iron mine she was looking for, not the Quicksilver mine. _In and out, Mari. In and out_.

As she neared the smelter, a couple of men steadily shoveled iron into the burning fires to meltdown, which would later be used in making weapons and armor. Mari could hear the woman yelling at her workers, pushing them harder to work faster. It was clear they were struggling, looking exhausted. The girl could feel herself getting angry, but she pushed it back. It wasn't the time to get emotional.

Mari could hear Nazir's voice in her thoughts once more. _Sometimes emotions can carry you, push you. Other times, they can hinder you, put you at risk. You need to learn how and when to use your emotions_. Taking slow and deep breaths, the assassin approached the screeching woman. 

"Work hard now! The pride of Iron-Breaker Mine is on the line."

"Pride of the what? This isn't the Legion, boss. We're miners, not soldiers," said a man, struggling to shovel the ore into the smelter.

"You'll shut your mouth and get back to work, or you won't be a miner or a soldier by the day's end. Hear me?"

"Uh, yes, ma'am."

Now that she was close to the woman, she could feel her heart pounding from nerves, her hands getting clammy in their gloves. Nazir was right, this wasn't the same as it was the last time, not to mention she was out in the open, but Mari was supposed to make an example out of the woman, to show the miners the job was done so she could get paid. Looking around, she had to make sure no guards or innocents were lurking other than the miners who had hired her.

"Excuse," she said to Beitlid, tapping her on the shoulder.

The older Nord woman turned around to look at Mari, but all she saw was a masked face, barely able to see the eyes. All she knew was that a woman was standing before her. "I'm really not in the mood. State your business, or take your leave."

"I represent the Dark Brotherhood. Someone wants you dead, Beitlid. Your death is at hand!" Mari recited what she was told to say, seeing the miners back away, nodding knowingly that it was the time, making themselves scarce.

The lack of surprise on the Nord woman's face took Mari aback. The woman wasn't frightened at all. "And let me guess that someone is my so-called husband, Leigelf? Well, the feeling's fucking mutual."

Mari remained silent, unsure of what to say if anything. Before Mari could react, the woman attacked her. "Well, we'll see about that now, won't we?" Beitlid shouted, punching Mari in the face.

Just as quickly, the shock wore off, pulling her dagger out. When the woman came at her again, Mari did a quick couple of jabs to some pressure points, paralyzing the woman and quickly slit her throat. She eased the woman to the ground and pulled her around behind the smelter. Making sure no one was looking still, the assassin, with great effort, shoved the body in the smelter. Out of breath and with trembling hands, Mari cleaned her gloves and dagger of blood in the smithing waters. When she was done, she sought out the miners before overthinking what she had just done, ignoring the trembling hands.

Upon entering the mine, looking for payment, she saw all the miners gathered, watching cooly, some afraid. Lifting her hands, Mari indicated she came in peace. "I'm just here for my payment."

"Is she really gone?" one of the miners asked.

"It is done," Mari replied.

"Where's... where's the uhm, b...body?"

"Gone," was all she offered, figuring the men and women wouldn't want the details of their boss' demise.

The miner who had asked the questions walked up and handed Mari a coin purse full of Septims. "As it was agreed upon," he said.

Mari reached for it, felt the heft, and determined the amount was close, shoving them in the pocket of her cloak. She nodded and said nothing else, leaving the miners to handle the mess that was to come, or perhaps life would be better for them. She hoped it did. Life was hard enough without compounding it with cruelty.

The whole mission went off without a hitch, and she managed to do it with a relatively stable stomach, much to her relief. Perhaps because she knew the woman was cruel. The thought helped.

Mari was supposed to leave immediately, but she figured what was one more hour or so? Heading back to Frigga near the woods, she changed out of her armor, and into a dress and into her cloak. She remembered seeing the feline beasts, the Khajiits about a quarter-mile outside of town, knowing they were not allowed into the cities. She wanted to look at their wares and see their unusual items for sale.

"Would you like to see Ahkari's goods?" said the female Khajiit with her strange accent, gray in fur, sitting in her tent legs crossed when Mari arrived.

"Who is Ahkari?" 

"I am Ahkari."

Mari had never met a Khajiit and didn't realize that they generally spoke in the third person. "Yes, I would like to see what you have for sale." 

Ahkari stood and allowed Mari inside the tent to look around all she had on display. "Is there a particular item you are looking for?" the feline asked, her accent thick.

"I am not sure. I want to get something for a friend, a mentor. He's a man, a warrior, so nothing feminine."

"This man is special, then?"

"Very."

"Take a look at this," Ahkari said, holding out an amulet. It was undoubtedly masculine, dark with a metal she was unfamiliar with, almost like a teardrop centered with a sapphire. "It is an Amulet of Kynareth and enchanted, so the wearer has increased stamina. It is made from precious moonstone."

"Oh, it’s beautiful and it looks perfect!" Mari exclaimed. 

After some time haggling, Mari headed out back home to Falkreath, her gift tucked closely to her, proud of her choice. Mari hoped Nazir liked it.

Nazir calmed himself when he saw Mari return from her mission and unharmed. He couldn't help but fret while she was away for nearly a week. All sorts of thoughts ran through his head that she had been mauled by a sabre cat, raped by bandits, killed by some thugs. He couldn't help it as he felt responsible for her safety. The Redguard did all he could to train her, not just to be successful, but to ensure she returned safely each time.

Straightening himself out, breathing for calmness, he nodded his head at her greeting. "I am glad you have returned safely. Was your job successful?"

The girl pouted, looked dejected as she entered. "Mari, what happened?" he nearly scolded her, but she just looked up, smiled brightly, and gave him a tight embrace and peck on the cheek. 

"I'm teasing you, Nazir. You are always so stiff!" she playfully berated him, handing him the bag of Septims.

"So it was good, you did well then?"

"I did."

"How did you...feel after?"

"Honestly, it was hard at first," she explained, sitting in one of his chairs as he sat across from her. "But she was so mean to her workers, and everyone there looked so...exhausted. It was like they hadn't slept in weeks, but she pushed and pushed, yelling at them. I didn't feel so bad afterward as long as those workers were happier."

"Indeed. I am proud of you, Mari. You did well, as I knew you would."

"Liar, you have 'nervous' written all over that stoic face of yours."

Nazir let out a breathy laugh in acquiescence, shaking his head at her perceptiveness. "You are learning fast. I...yes, I was worried about you. Not your job, which I knew you could do, but a lot can happen in six days."

She was strangely touched by his worries. It was unusual for Nazir to show any sort of affection or caring, though she knew he did feel those things for her. "You trained me well, Nazir. If I die, it won't be due to a lack of abilities. Here, I have something for you," Mari said, excitement in her voice as she changed the subject.

"Mari, you didn't go back into the town or allow yourself to be recognized, did you?"

"Give me some credit! No, there was a Khajiit caravan outside of Dawnstar," she replied, handing him a box. She watched him pull out the amulet, holding up to look closely at it. "It's an…"

"...Amulet of Kynareth, yes. I know what it is. This is expensive, Mari."

"Do you not like it?"

Nazir looked at her worried cerulean eyes. "I love it. I'm sorry, yes, I love it. I don't know why you spent so much on me." Nazir put the amulet around his neck, feeling the energy of the enchantment flow into him.

"Isn't it obvious? You have taken care of me for the past four years and I thought it was time I did something for you, as small as it is."

"It is not small, and I will always treasure it. Now, it is time to go report to Astrid. I am sure she will have jobs flowing for you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to be clear, Nazir's jealousy isn't of a sexual nature.
> 
> Next: Mari needs a different sort of training.


	6. Turning Tables

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that Mari is older and successful as an assassin, Astrid has a special job for her, one that will take a couple of months to plan. She seeks the help of Nazir to get her through the process. What was thought to be a learning experience turned into so much more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW content

Another two years had flown by, seemingly in a flash. Mari had proved time and again her a talented and capable Dark Brotherhood assassin. Some jobs were more complicated than, while a few were dangerous. There were times she came home injured, but not once did she miss her mark. Not once did she mishandle her job and fail to take out the target. It became second nature to her. 

Because of her talent and success, Astrid sometimes allowed Mari to pick and choose assignments. She still wanted to maintain that sort of integrity that was so difficult to find in her line of work. Mari wanted to remove those people who deserved it, not wanting to spill innocent blood. She didn’t want to kill a person just because someone was out there who had no justifiable reason other than hate. It felt a waste of her talents and left a bad taste in her mouth. Mari wasn't naive enough to believe that those innocent lives would not be taken by someone else in the Dark Brotherhood, but it wouldn't be by her hands.

Her success wasn't the only change in Mari's life. As she neared her twentieth Name-Day, something stirred deep inside of her. She was too busy and she could ignore it, but now that she was home for a month with no work, there was too much time on her hands. The time allowed her to ponder other things than work, like Nazir. Her bond with him never wavered, but as she aged, changing physically and mentally, she saw him more than her friend and mentor. There was always that underlying crush she had, laughing it off to youth, but those crushes felt like they were evolving something else, something deeper. Those feelings became difficult to ignore. 

Mari tried not to think about it every time Nazir and she sparred, when he had her pinned to the floor, smelling him, feeling his hard body pressed against her. Sometimes she would let him gain the upper hand so she could feel him under her. Nazir scolded her for her lack of concentration, but it was worth it. 

Some evenings she touched herself, hands exploring her body as she thought of him. Then she would get angry with herself for feeling that way. Maybe it was just a stupid crush. It wasn’t as if she was exposed to other young men. The girl turned woman had known Nazir for nearly six years, knowing he still saw her as a little girl or did he? Perhaps that was just in her mind.

Shaking her head, she tried to get the thoughts out as he inconveniently knocked on her open bedroom door, while she brushed her hair. She hoped she succeeded in hiding her feelings, which was not easy since they knew each other so well. When she was ready, Mari yelled for him to come in and gave him an innocent smile. 

Nazir tried to not stare at her. As he expected, she had become quite the beauty, watching her brush out her hair for the evening. It was long and silky and… _Stop it_.

"I am just here to let you know that Astrid wants to see you for a special job."

"Really?"

"I think she has got something big for you, Mari."

All thoughts of Nazir washed away in her excitement as she got properly dressed to meet with Astrid. The leader was hovered over her table, her usual spot while she worked. Her blonde hair tied up out of her face as she inspected the map before her. "Did you want to see me, Astrid."

The woman looked up and turned to lean back on the table, arms folded. "Yes, I have a job for you. I have to admit, dear, I did not expect you to survive long with us, but you have proven me wrong, despite your birth. You have brought us quite a bit of gold, now I would like to reward you with something more complex. Do you think you are ready?"

"Yes, I am ready," Mari replied, trying not to appear too eager.

"Good. There is a man in Markarth we have been hired to get rid of, you know the drill. But he is no ordinary man. He is powerful, a lot of money backing him up. He is a leader of a crime family, and we have been paid quite a small fortune to ensure his demise."

"Interesting, go on."

"His name is Thongvor Silver-Blood, the patriarch. I want you to get close to him. This isn't a simple in and out assassination. You have to get close. He lives in a household full of family and guards. This man is to be the next Jarl should something happen to the current one. The person who hired us wishes to not let that happen. The man is a criminal. Your job is to get him out of his house, away from others, and take him out. I chose you not just for your abilities but also for your looks," Astrid explained, staring directly at Mari's chest. "You are also a Nord. The Silver-Blood family are strong believers of Talos."

The young woman did her best not to cover herself up from Astrid's stares. She quickly got the idea of what Astrid was referring too despite her inexperience. Mari had to use her sex to get close to the man. She wanted a complicated job, but dread filled her with this one. She never had sex before, no thanks, in part, due to Nazir's interference. It was not only complicated, but her lack of experience with men was going to have a profound effect on the outcome of the job. There was no way Mari could draw out the man, but she wasn't about to tell Astrid that, confident she would figure it out.

"Do you think you can use your sex to get Thonar to close to you... privately?" the leader asked, not aware of Mari's innocence.

"Yes, I can do it," Mari said, showing as much confidence as she could convey to her leader.

"Good, don't disappoint. You have two months to plan this out."

Mari sat down to dinner that night, her mind turbulent, tossing ideas around in her head, ignoring the laughs and chatter at the table from her family. How could she, a woman who never had sex before, use it to draw a man out. What was worse; he was always surrounded by people. It was indeed an involved job, but if she could pull it off, she would be at the top of her game and have jobs that she chose, not ones chosen for her.

Nazir ate his meal, watching Mari being unusually quiet. She seemed lost in thought, brows furrowed. Normally, when she received a job and a challenging one, she was excited and talkative. This one must be especially complex to have the girl so quiet, picking at her food. 

"Can you not do the job?" Nazir asked.

Mari looked up and smiled, "Sorry, I think so. It's... I'm still figuring things out."

"Let me know if you need help."

She nodded, but her eyes didn't waver from his face when he went back to his meal, talking to the others. Perhaps she could use his help. Soon, Mari's mind started swirling with ideas.

Most everyone went to sleep or were in their rooms reading, planning. Mari sat on her bed and opened the drawer, pulling out a delicate robe. It was one she bought several months ago on an assignment. Spending her youth in poverty, she wanted to use some of her hard-earned gold on beautiful things, even if she rarely got to wear or use them. It was a reminder of her hard work, that she deserved nice things once in a while. 

The delicate fabric was cool and soft as she rubbed it against her cheek. Made from spider silk, it was white with large red embroidered flowers all over. As soon as she saw it, she had to buy it but had not worn it yet, not having any occasion to do so.

Mari's hands trembled as she removed all her clothes, including her smalls and slipped on the robe, its gentle fabric almost caressing her skin, embracing it. She knew it was something she planned to wear for the man in Markarth. For now, it would serve a different purpose.

Using her looking glass, she brushed her long blonde hair, letting it fall along her back and shoulders. Taking a deep and shuddering breath, she headed out of her room, quickly glancing around to make sure no one could see her as she slipped out, tip-toeing to his room. Mari must have stood there forever, or least it felt that way. She shimmied the sleeve of the robe off of her shoulder, the skin just peeking through at her attempts to seduce. Mari hoped her mentor could see her as the woman she was, not the girl she used to be. That was her biggest challenge.

Nazir was shirtless, reading in bed before sleeping for the evening when he heard the soft knock on his door. Putting his book aside, he answered it. Though he may not have appeared surprised, he certainly felt it seeing Mari standing in his doorway. It wasn't unusual for her to come to talk to him, but it was dressed as she was. Not since he first saw her in her new leather armor had he felt something stir with heat until that moment. He had never seen the robe before. It was thin, silky, and short—too short—exposing her long legs. He admonished himself for feeling something akin to arousal deep inside and looking at her the way he was. Nazir forced his eyes away from her body to her face.

"Mari, what can I do for you?"

"Can we speak privately, and not leave me out here dressed like this?" she asked, face flushed in embarrassment with a strange combination of pleasurable heat at his stares.

"Right, sorry."

Mari walked in as he closed the door. When she turned around, her hands fidgeted and her face was a lovely shade of pink, unable to meet his eyes. It was as if she found a point of interest on his wall and used that as a focal point. 

"Mari…"

Her face bloomed brighter when he said her name, nearly losing her confidence and left, but she swallowed her pride and nerves. If she couldn't get through this with Nazir, someone she had known for years, how could she get through her new assignment? 

"I need help, and earlier...you offered to, uhm, to help me."

"OK, what do you need help with?" Nazir tried to hide the disappointment or was it relief, in his voice thinking she had wanted something else entirely—to business then.

Taking a deep breath, Mari untied her robe and let it drop around her folded arms, exposing pert breasts to the man she had known for six years trying to ignore his shock. The man who never showed anything on his face—always stoic—was currently an open book. "I have to get close to a man. I...I uhm, don't know what to do," she said, eyes pleading, trying not to cover herself up feeling her face on fire. Disappointment filled her when he approached and pulled up her robe, covering her back up.

"No, Mari. I have known you too long," Nazir said, unable to control his hardness at seeing her body—ashamed.

"You have to help me," she pleaded, her desperation overcoming any embarrassment she may have felt earlier. “Astrid thinks I can do this and I don’t want to prove to her I’m incapable of a seduction job.”

"I...I…"

Feeling humiliated and angry, arms folded, she didn't hide it as she lectured, "You chased off, no, terrified, all the potential men. I could have lost my virginity by now if you hadn’t. I have to do this if I want to be successful in my next assignment. I’m not about to travel to an entirely different town just for sex. Though I have forgiven you, you owe me. I don't want to fail at this. It’s not just that… I trust you.”

Nazir was close enough to reach out to her, give her what she wanted, but the internal struggles were intense, pulling him in different directions. He should have known scaring those boys off would bite in the ass later. Despite being her mentor, he couldn't help but see her as more than a child as she had grown into an adult. He was still young himself, but it felt wrong, and he told her as much.

"It is not wrong. Why does it have to be wrong? I am here willing... you aren't taking." Mari stood close to him, pressing two hands to his chest, her body molded against him, trying to keep herself from fleeing in embarrassment, needing to push her and him through this. It helped to see the amulet she gave him two years before that he still wore, strangely touching her on a deep emotional level.

Her hand snaked up to his face, feeling the coarse scruff of his beard then smoothness beyond. His head leaned into her touch. She looked up as she bore her blue eyes into his dark ones, grateful he didn't pull away. "I think about you... at night, late, touching. There is no other man I have ever been bound to—only you. As I get older, I realize we are more than just a teacher and student, more than just friends. I have grown to care about you beyond that, and I want you. There is no one I would rather have teaching me what I need to know. Please, Nazir."

Her words moved him as his defensive walls came crumbling down. The Redguard lost control, so unlike him, as his hand slipped through her silky hair— _so soft_ —cupping the back of her head as they pressed foreheads. He was a storm inside, unsteady, but the decision was already made before his brain even registered the thought. 

"I will teach you," he whispered.

Mari's relief was nearly palpable as she melted into him, but was soon replaced with nerves, unsure what to expect. She knew how it all worked, just not how it all felt. Her only sexual experiences were late-night touchings with exploring fingers, learning to pleasure herself. The young woman had no idea how to pleasure a man, hoping Nazir would teach her all.

She felt a tug on the back of her head as he fisted her hair, pulling her back, his eyes now heated as he pressed his soft lips to hers, hearing herself moan as he slipped his tongue in her mouth, seeking, exploring. Her last kiss was timid, stiff, unsure. Nazir's kiss was heated, experienced, confident. It should have felt strange kissing him, but it didn't. She should have been a bundle of nerves, but she felt the nerves wash away, trusting him. It felt natural as if they were meant to be. Mari realized at that moment it would be more than a lesson; it would be something they shared on another, more profound level.

Nazir pushed her back by the shoulders with gentleness, staring in her eyes, pupils dilated in lust. Thumbs slid down her robe then down her arms, exposing her breasts. When before he covered her in shame, now he wanted to touch them, taste them. "You must experience lovemaking first, and remove your virginity before full lessons begin. Though you can take this experience and learn from it," he informed her.

Mari nodded, uncertain what to say, heart thundering in anticipation, nearly drowning out her thoughts and expectations.

He pulled her in once more to kiss her, feeling her fingers dig into his tight chest, scraping nails through his curly chest hair. Nazir's face nuzzled hers, lips moving down her cheek to her neck, using the grip of her hair to guide her head, exposing more of her. The feel of her breasts pressed up against his chest nearly did him in. It was then he realized he saw her more than a student for a while. He had pushed such thoughts away, tucking them neatly into the little boxes of his mind. Now he opened up to her, allowing his desire to guide him.

Both out of breath from anticipation, Nazir led Mari to his bed, pushing her to lie on her back as he stood watching, her breathing erratic. Her body was tight, beautiful, full of curves, skin pale. He pulled off his breaches and smalls, exposing himself, nearly laughing at Mari's widened eyes, yet with some trepidation at what was between his legs. Her eyes didn't waver from between his legs as he sauntered over to his bed. Hovering over her, he kissed her once more, a hand exploring her smooth skin.

"You should also touch me," he instructed. "Follow my lead."

Nazir didn't see her nod as he kissed her neck, moving down to her shoulders, feeling her hands explore his chest and arms. Fingers dug into his flesh as he nibbled a nipple and thrust into him as her back arched. He should have felt strange, but he didn't, surprised there wasn't much guilt. Perhaps that was the lust speaking for him. He would know for sure when it was over, but he pushed such worries aside. He needed to remain focused solely on Mari beneath him—the woman beneath him.

Mari had no idea the extent of desire and lust she could achieve until Nazir started touching her breasts, sucking them, swirling a tongue around her nipples. She gave in to the new sensations. Even her nighttime touches didn't compare to being touched by another man. A moan escaped her lips as his mouth and tongue trailed down her flesh. Her instincts tried to kick in, blocking his hand as it slipped between her legs, forcing the muscles to stay loose and not clamp shut. Eyes shut, she didn't notice Nazir watching her, making sure she was OK as he explored areas that had never been touched by a man.

Nazir's own eyes closed, silencing his shuddered breath as his fingers trailed her folds to feel how wet she was, wanting to taste her, losing track of where the lines were between lust and lessons. Being honest with himself, he knew this was more of a want, a need, than anything. He would teach her all, but he would enjoy every second of it. A crooked smile played on his lips to see her face covered with hands to hide her blush as his own face neared her sex.

"There is no need for embarrassment," he said, seeing her smile, blushing as she forced her hands from her eyes, tangling them in the blanket beneath her. "If you do this, you cannot hide. You have to open up."

Mari nodded and forced her muscles to relax, allowing Nazir to explore her body with mouth and tongue. Feeling him spread her thighs, her sex arched into his mouth achingly as his tongue grazed her wet folds, a mewl escaping her lips. The sensation was better than she imagined, and she certainly imagined him licking her as her fingers probed in the night. 

“This is what I imagine at night, touching myself—you just like this.”

His own moan escaped between her legs with her confession, her honesty. She felt hands clenching the flesh of her hips as he pulled her deep into his mouth, tongue exploring, teasing. Her tentative fingers finally reached for him as the heat ebbed and flowed in her body, grazing fingers through his coarse hair, feeling his shaved sides, then the oils he used to keep the dreads supple. 

Her stomach fluttered to almost painful proportions as his tongue congregated around her sensitive bundle of nerves, triggering a few body spasms. It hurt yet it was pleasure. She knew that ever-familiar sensation as the heat built up, centering around her sex, knowing she was close. The explosion was sudden as her back arched, grasping his head tightly, her moan loud. Never was she able to create such a sensation as Nazir did just then, pulsing in his mouth. A couple of tears slipped out of her eyes, not knowing where all the emotions came from. As calming waves washed over her like an ocean after a storm, she felt limp and relaxed, muscles unable to move had she tried.

Kissing back up her body when he reached her closed eyes, he smiled knowingly. "Are you OK?"

Mari just nodded, not trusting herself to speak.

"Are you ready for the rest of it?"

"I think so."

"You have to be sure, Mari."

“I’m ready.”

She opened her eyes to see Nazir staring down at her, eyes filled with a comforting tenderness, confirming her complete trust in the man.

"I will never hurt you on purpose."

"I know you wouldn't. I trust you."

That trust conveyed in her eyes. Never had someone trusted him so openly, strengthening the bond he had for Mari, recognizing what they were doing was inevitable. 

"We must begin while your body is loose and ready for me—that means now," he informed her.

Mari ran fingers through her damp palms, feeling nervous once more, but trusting him. She heard him whisper in her ears to relax, kissing her neck, trying to keep herself from clenching tight as his tip grazed her folds, not yet penetrating her. 

There were many ways he could make love to her, but he kept things simple, not wanting to hurt her. They could explore more later, and he found himself opening up to the idea, excited for it. All doubts that flooded his mind when she first came to him that night washed away, filled with a desire to please her, wanting her first time to be remembered fondly. He purposefully entered her, watching her closed eyes to make sure she wasn't hurting. He wasn't exactly small, and he hoped she could take him.

The moan that slipped out wasn't one of pleasure but discomfort as he slowed down, entering little by little. The push-through was easier than expected, feeling her fingers dig into his flesh, knowing it hurt her, but she didn't cry out. "Tell me you are OK."

"Yes... I'm, I'm fine. It's...getting better."

He started to pick up the pace, penetrating deeper, but still careful not to cause her pain or harm as he pushed through again and again and again. As his own heat built up with each thrust, he propped himself, looking down on the beautiful woman beneath him, her hands grasping her hair, mouth open, eyes closed, accepting him, trusting him. The very idea pulled his explosion out of nowhere, pulsating inside her feeling her muscles tighten around him. He was unable to control the growls that escaped him, loud to his ears, but he didn't care. Despite the sweat and warmth of his body, chills ran up his arms, not knowing what it meant, but it mattered—it mattered.

Nazir knew he was heavy, so he pulled out of her with some regret, rolling over on his side to face her as he planted tender kisses on her cheek, chin, nose, lips. When she opened her eyes, the look she gave him told all. Their bond was complete, the lovemaking a ritual to fulfill something neither realized they needed or wanted. The lazy and sleepy smile that spread across her face made his heart hammer in his chest, knowing he gave her just what she needed, and it would be something she would look back on fondly.

"Thank you," Mari said.

The Redguard didn't know what to say, 'you're welcome' seemingly so insufficient at that moment, trying to grasp for the right words. 

Mari rolled over on her side, facing him, hands tucked under the side of her face. "It was better than I could have hoped."

His tongue felt thick, throat constricted, still unable to speak as he ran gentle fingers along her face, those bright blue eyes remaining so trusting. He watched her pupils dilate as her brows furrowed, sitting up, telling him she should probably go back to her room. It was then he finally found his voice and pulled her back down. "Don't. Stay with me."

A gentle smile on her face, crushing him. _Why does that affect me so?_

"Aren't you afraid others will start yammering and gossiping?" she asked him. 

_What did she say? Others?_ He had to clear his mind, doing a mental head shake. "I am sure they already know anyway. We were not exactly quiet. It doesn’t matter."

Nazir worried that when they were done, there would be a sort of awkwardness between them, that he would feel guilty for what happened, but those feelings didn't exist. All he knew was he didn't want her to leave.

Mari was not expecting to stay the night with him, surprised by his affection, but welcomed it. It was more than she hoped. Lying back down on his bed, he pulled the covers on top of them, as they melted into each other, a heavy arm draped around her as he kissed her forehead. He must have been exhausted, for he quickly fell asleep, a light snore coming from him as his breathing slowed. She snuggled into him, inhaling him, the smell of musk, vanilla, and some sort of spice she didn't recognize. It was a familiar smell, something she had known for years. 

She was tired, but not quite ready to sleep yet, her mind busy with thoughts of what happened between them, trying to relive their moment in her head. While the sex started out to be painful, she never expected it to feel good either. Somewhere deep in her mind, as she started to get drowsy, she realized this was more than just sex and losing her virginity. It was meaningful, they cared about each other. Kissing his sleeping lips, she soon fell asleep to his rhythmic breathing.

Mari woke up; it must have been early because Nazir was still sleeping, back turned to her. He was an early riser, meditated in the morning before he did anything. She reached out to touch his smooth, dark back, but she withdrew her hand to let him sleep longer. Stifling a yawn, she snuck out his bed and put on her robe. She was exhausted as she rubbed her eyes and stumbled out of his room, heading straight to the kitchen to make some tea. It wasn't that she didn't sleep well, it was because she slept too well. Eyes still blurry, her face cringed as she moved, sore, achy between her legs.

Dumping water into a mug with tea leaves, she inserted a finger to cast a spell heating up the water and drank it down greedily, needing the stimulant the tea provided and quenching her thirst. Making one more mug, she scratched her head, brushing tangled hair out of her eyes and turned around to lean on the counter blowing on her hot tea. Her vision cleared to see several people staring at her, jolting her suddenly awake. Mari felt the heat creep up her face as she struggled to cover herself better. She assumed it was early since Nazir was still asleep, not realizing he had overslept, and everyone else was eating breakfast already.

"Oh, Gods… Uhm…"

"Have a good night then," Gabriella said, her voice dripping with sarcasm knowing full well Mari had a great night.

Her family struggled not to laugh at her discomfort and embarrassment as she stood like a frightened deer. "Uhh… N...nothing happened."

"Right, nothing happened. It was only a couple of mammoths getting it on last night, I suppose," Gabriella said, deadpanned.

"Your 'nothing' kept me up for an hour," Veezara complained.

"I didn't hear anything," Festus offered.

"That's because you are old and deaf," Veezara yelled in Festus' ear.

What?"

"Exactly…" huffed Veezara.

"Well, I think it's great, and it's about time," Babette offered. "I knew you two were made for each other." Standing up from the table, she rushed out and quickly returned, handing Mari a bottle of some potion. "I made this last night for you and suggest you drink it this morning. Don't want any...you know, accidents around here."

"T...thanks," Mari said, at a loss of any other coherent words. "Uhm, excuse me…" she finally managed, drinking down the potion, and ran off to get cleaned up for the day. In her embarrassment, she didn't see where she was going and slammed into the stone wall that was Nazir's muscular body. He grabbed her to steady her. "S...sorry," she said, running off.

"I suppose I overslept," he yawned as he walked into the kitchen.

"Yes, sex will do that," Gabriella offered.

"Ah, that explains Mari's reaction. You all didn't give her a hard time, did you?"

Gabriella snorted, "Who? Us? We would never…"

"You would and any chance you got, Gab," Nazir chuckled. "Give her a break, please." He didn't want to explain to everyone that she was new to it all, not wanting it getting back to Astrid and ruining Mari's chances at that job she was assigned to.

He grabbed some tea for himself and a plate of food, enough for two, and brought it back to his room, then went in search of Mari. Knocking on her closed door, she opened it, now dressed. Through her embarrassment with her family earlier, she found she couldn't find the words to say anything to him, but all that washed away when he pulled her in for an embrace, smelling the sleep still on his skin with the residual scent of sex from the night before. It strangely comforted her as she wrapped her arms around him.

"Don't let them bother you. They tease because they like you. You are family."

"I know, I shouldn't care, but I walked into that kitchen nearly naked still. It's not as if that robe covers much. I walked right past them, not even noticing. I was so out of it. I...it just shocked me a bit."

"How do you feel?"

Mari blew out a small laugh, "Tired and still sore."

"Come, I have breakfast in my room for us, so you don't have to eat with the others this morning, listening to their teases and torments."

After breakfast, Mari left for a couple of days to do a small job, leaving Nazir alone with his thoughts. He had to think seriously about what transpired between him and Mari. Last night was definitely more than just helping her for an upcoming job. What they had was real, a connection. There was no denying that, and he wondered if she felt the same. She looked as if she did, but he didn't want to make presumptions. It was the strongest he had felt about someone since her… He forced the thoughts out of his mind, not wanting to face those demons, reminding himself that he was young at the time, impetuous, but those were lies he told himself. Nazir thought he had those memories well under control, and it helped to meditate every day, easing his mind. Now they were intrusive like a slow drip rather than a flood, but eventually, that bucket would fill, overflow.

He couldn’t get over how soft her hair was as fingers tangled and curled in the long blonde locks. Nazir's head rolled back into the chair, spreading knees further apart as Mari took him into her mouth. She had spent the past two months listening to his instructions and had become quite good at it. He struggled for breath the closer he got, the warmth spreading between his legs. _No, don't_ , he pleaded in his mind as she moved away to run her tongue, twirling on his sensitive tip, sending a jolt through his body. As soon as her mouth encompassed his hardness, it didn't take long before he released with a sigh, or was it a moan that poured out of him as she continued until he was done and flaccid.

Nazir's head continued to lay back as Mari crawled into his lap, running clammy hands along her back, barely able to move, his senses numb. He felt hands grasp his face and pull him in for a kiss, her tongue tasting like him as it intruded in his mouth, but he didn't care. There wasn't a time he could remember feeling that good during sex. Perhaps it was their bond, their connection, despite being in love before. She drew him to her in a way he never could have imagined. While he still instructed her, it was much, much more than that.

"Was that OK?" she asked, pressing soft lips along his stubbled chin and cheeks.

"Give me a moment… I think my lungs stopped working."

"I will take that as a yes, then," Mari giggled, climbing off of him, but strong arms pulled her back.

Finally, regaining his strength, he lifted Mari in one fell swoop and flung her over his shoulder as he stood, carrying her to bed, enjoying her laughter. Nazir gently laid her down on the bed, him crawling next to her as he combed the hair from her face with fingers. 

Her laughter died down, but her smile didn't as she looked at him, a longing in her eyes. "This is real, isn't it?"

He didn't ask her to clarify, knowing precisely what she meant. "Yes."

"I leave tomorrow for Markarth."

"I know."

"I'm going to miss you."

"And I will miss you," he said, kissing her forehead.

The nightmares were more frequent ever since he and Mari grew closer. He rarely had them anymore until a couple of months ago. He cursed quietly, sitting up sweating when it woke him, the emotional pain all too real. He turned to look back at her, awake, hands tender, consoling, eyes worried. 

"Tell me," she whispered.

"It is not your pain to bear."

"Your pain is my pain."

"I can't."

She didn't press him, hoping he would eventually be forthcoming about what was troubling him so much. Instead, she cast a calming spell on him, pulled him down, and held him as his body cooled and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Would love to know your thoughts on our story in the comments below. <3
> 
> Next: Markarth and the Silver-Bloods.
> 
> I don't know if I will do any art for this. I'm kind of mojoed out with everything. I'm barely doing any mixed media art these days. Online learning at school started for my new middle-schooler, my oldest is off to college tomorrow and I worry. If I do any, it will be of Mari. I just suck doing art of men.
> 
> I have a new story up... I seriously need the distraction. I've been working very hard on it and it's already become special to me. I hope you check it out. [The Renegade](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26058193)


	7. Come Into My Web

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After two months of training, Mari arrives in Markarth for her biggest assignment, Thongvor Silver-Blood. She finds herself struggling with the assassination as she gets to know the man, but she pushes through with her job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! We would love to hear from you in the comments section what you thought <3

The trip was long, fraught with danger at times, and Mari was relieved to see the gleaming stone city before her. Skyrim, she found as she explored its lands, was filled with ancient wonders, and Markarth was no different, an ancient city built by ancient beings no longer in existence, yet their legacy still stood for all to marvel. Even better were the large stables, knowing Frigga would be well cared for. Despite that, she took her time grooming her black stallion, giving him kisses and an apple treat before making her way to the city gates.

Taking a deep breath, she went over her plan in her head and headed through the golden gates. She was forever grateful to Nazir in teaching her all she would need to be successful in her mission. But it was more than that. It wasn't just about teachings for her, but that she was able to connect to the man on a deeper level, never genuinely appreciating how strong their bond was. The woman knew and understood it, but did not realize how important it was until then. She smiled as her stomach fluttered with thoughts of Nazir. Yes, she would miss him. Her mission would take a bit of time, and she couldn't rush it if she wanted to succeed.

The innkeeper at Silver Blood Inn, Kleppr, was ecstatic that she rented a room for an entire month, happy for all the Septim and gave her a free mead as she unwound from her trip, sipping it as she unpacked. Despite the wonder of the city, she hated the sounds coming from it. There were constant clangings and hums that quickly grated her nerves, not used to it, hoping her ears would rapidly desensitize. She headed to the cellar to bathe the journey off of her feeling, not just the dust and grime but also the muscle aches wash away in the warmth and steam. 

After dinner, she went to bed early, lying there on the stone bed, going over every contingency in her head. Mari would start in the morning, hoping the mission wouldn't take as long as a month to hurry back into Nazir's strong arms. But she worried about the man and his nightmares that had come almost nightly now. She knew something had happened to him in Hammerfell, but he was never forthcoming about it. He was an honest man, never having a need to lie, so it must have been bad if he kept it from her. She would care about him no matter what, but perhaps that was what he was worried about, her opinion of him. She owed him everything and would never turn her back on him.

Mari knew to get close to Thongvor, she wouldn't be able to behave like a stereotypical prostitute to get the man in her bed. No, her plan was to be a woman who became a noble from being a successful merchant, and she struck it rich with a newly discovered gold mine in the Rift. It wasn't the truth, of course, but the area was far enough that the family wouldn't check it for a long time after she was long gone. Her made-up story repeated in her head, she put on, not a dress but well-tailored breeches, a blue tunic to bring out her eyes and soft leather boots. She wanted to be different, unique. That was the only way to get the man's attention, that and a true believer of Talos.

It was still early morning, and the city was just waking up. Vendors were opening their stalls, ringing in the distance of hammer to anvil could be heard at the smithy, and children started playing in the streets. All seemed normal in the big city as everyday life started. But tucked away in the shadows of a building, Mari bided her time, waiting for Thongvor to make his appearance to Understone Keep where he usually hung out, apparently harassing the local Arkay Priest and others who weren't strong supporters and believers of Talos. 

There he was, just as he was described to her. His hair nearly shaved, a tattoo on his face, and he was older but not as old as she expected probably in his early forties, he was quite handsome. Mari bundled up her scrolls of maps of locations, and her make-believe mine documents, and property rights. She made her way to the man, struggling to carry her load. Feigning distraction, she crashed right into the Nord, dropping all her scrolls to the ground. 

"Oh, dear, I...I am terribly sorry, sir! I...I wasn't looking where I was going," she muttered, struggling to pick up all her scrolls, dropping them again. 

"Stop, it was my fault. I was distracted," Thongvor replied, bending down to help her pick up all her documents. When he helped her stand, he couldn't help but notice the Talos amulet had fallen out of her tunic.

"Get your hands off me!" Mari nearly screamed at the man as he reached for her chest.

"I...I...sorry," he coughed, unable to control his blush, realizing his mistake. All he wanted to do was protect her from the Thalmor, who prowled about the city looking for Talos worshipers. Regaining his composure, he apologized once more, bowing. "My apologies. Your amulet had fallen out, and I did not want to see you hurt. This is a dangerous city for the likes of us. I truly meant no offense."

"Oh, well, thank you then," she said, then her chin lifted in defiance. "But I am not afraid of the Thalmor or the Imperials. They have no right to take away my beliefs!"

It was then the man realized how beautiful she was, a true representation of a Nord woman, tall, blonde, blue-eyed, strong, and defiant. He brushed aside thoughts of fantasy getting to know her as he was probably too old for the young woman. "Finally, someone with decent sense. The Empire is destroying everything Skyrim stands for. Honor. Pride. Mighty Talos. Jarl Igmund can't ignore us for much longer. Not if the Silver-Blood family has a say."

"The Silver-Blood family? You are a part of them?"

"Yes, why?" he asked, his eyes narrowed and wary.

"Well, I was about to meet with Thonar Silver-Blood about some business. You wouldn't happen to be him, would you?"

Thongvor scoffed, "No, that would be my younger brother, and while we share the business together, we aren't exactly close." 

"That is too bad," Mari said, pretending to be empathetic, but uncertain what to say to the man.

"Here, let me help you carry these in and get the door for you."

"Well, despite all my information on the Silver-Blood family, no one told me one of them was such a gentleman," she smiled brightly at him. "I appreciate the help."

"It is my pleasure," the man said, taking some of her scrolls as he walked her to the Treasury House, where his family lived and worked. 

"After you," Thongvor said after opening the door, heart fluttering at her beautiful smile as she looked up at him. "This way."

Mari followed the flustering man, pleased her plan was working so far. The Nord man led her to a room up on the next level, seeing another gentleman who looked like Thongvor, but younger, working at a stable.

"What do you want," said Thonar, not looking up. "I told you I wanted no visitors."

"Sorry, brother, but you will want to see this one. She...sorry, I didn't catch your name."

"Because I didn't throw it," Mari winked, teasing him, making the man blush.

"Right…"

"My name is Jodis," she said, using her mother's name. 

"Beautiful Nord name," Thongvor offered.

"If you're done flirting with the lady, you can go about your business and leave us," Thonar said, clearly impatient.

Bowing to Mari, Thongvor left as his brother ordered, hiding his embarrassment rather well.

"Have a seat, Jodis."

"Thank you." Mari sat down across from the man, laying all her scrolls on his table with nowhere else to place them. "Sorry."

Thonar sighed in annoyance but kept his irritation at bay. "What is it you need?"

"Advice? Business partner? Anything at this point," Mari explained, feigning ignorance being new to wealth and business. "I got lucky with one of my merchant deals. I make specialized alchemical potions for...well, let's just say, struggling marriages. I quickly became successful."

"You seem awfully young to get rich so quickly," he said, hardly believing the young lady could create something high in demand and get rich so fast.

"As I said, I got lucky. Selling my product in unique ways helped. I may be young, but I'm not stupid. My parents both died, and I had to find a way to survive on my own. My mother was good with alchemy, teaching me all she knew." Mari dug in her pack and pulled out a bottle, setting it in front of the man. "Here, a free sample." She intentionally made a real potion for the man in case he wanted to confirm the validity of her story.

"You don't make money giving things away for free," he scolded her. If he was going to work with her and hadn't decided yet, things would have to change. 

Mari shrugged, "I beg to differ. It was giving away free samples that had people clamoring for more. They had nothing to lose by trying it and finding it actually worked, well, they wanted more."

"We will address that later," Thonar offered. "What is it you need from me exactly?"

"Specifically, I need help with a newly discovered mine I recently purchased in the Rift...a gold mine. I realize it is far, but this mine could truly put me on top with likes of the Silver-Blood family and the Black-Briars. I want to be that rich and powerful, and this gold mine is going to do it for me, trying to follow in your footsteps," she said, stroking the man's ego.

Thonar sat back, fingers steepled under his chin as he thought about what she was asking. "Why would I want you to be my equal? If I'm on top, I don't want someone else to top me."

Mari expected the resistance, "I'm not asking for help so I can be better than you. I'm asking for help in being my partner. I don't want you to be a part of my potion business, but I do want you to be a part of my mining business. I don't know the first thing about mining, but you do. Since I own it, I, of course, will get most of the shares."

"Half. You will get half of the shares, if I agree, that is. I will be putting in considerable work, workers, and money into it. I expect to get paid well for my investment."

After some haggling and Mari showed him her fake documents and maps, they finally agreed on an arrangement, signing the fraudulent contract she prepared beforehand.

Now that was out of the way, she was inside the family, for now, she headed towards Understone Keep, knowing Thongvor would be lurking there, pretending she was going to visit the Dwemer Museum since her business was concluded. 

Mari walked into the vast and ancient Dwemer building where the Jarl lived, and the Thalmor were stationed. The entrance was a crumbling ruin, but it looked like it was in the process of being fixed up and cleared out. She saw Thongvor in the distance, leaning against a stone wall, arms crossed, looking quite surly. She assumed he was there for intimidation purposes, but she liked that he stuck to his beliefs, unafraid to express them, even if he belonged to a horrible family. It was good to know, helpful to get a grasp of the man he was in order to perfectly play her part. 

Pretending she didn't notice him, she looked around, eyes in awe at what she was seeing. Mari walked up to a guard and asked him where the museum was, so she could take a look when someone interrupted her. As expected, Thongvor walked over, giving her a slight bow and offered to show her around. He held out his elbow for her to grasp as he led her up a flight of stairs. 

"It is locked, but I have the key. I would be happy to show you around."

"Oh, so you aren't just a gentleman, but kind as well," she said, giving him a small laugh.

"It comes easy with a woman such as you on my arm."

Mari had to quickly think of some embarrassing moment to force her to blush, looking away shyly. She didn't have to pretend to be in awe as she looked around at all the weapons, gadgets, machinery parts created by ancient people. It was quite the legacy they left behind. 

The man watched the lovely Nord reading a plaque about a Dwemer spider, trying not to stare, but he couldn't help it. Thongvor slipped beside her, making sure he brushed his shoulder against hers, pretending to read along with her. 

"So how did business go with my brother? I hope he wasn't too difficult to deal with."

Mari gave him one of her winning smiles, "Well, he's not quite as charming as you, but we managed to conclude our business. I had planned out a longer trip, but I guess I should be on my way now that it is done."

"You're leaving already?"

"What else am I to do?" Mari shrugged, knowing she had him hooked.

"There are many parts of the city you haven't even seen yet. You must stay, at least for a couple of more days," Thongvor said, feeling bolder around this woman, but trying not to sound like he was begging. The last thing he wanted was to appear weak in front of her, desperate.

Mari turned around to face the Nord, arms folded, but a crooked smile played on her lips. "Mr. Silver-Blood, are you interested in me?"

"Mr. Silver-Blood is my father, and yes, I have to admit, I am," Thongvor said, being honest with her. He knew she would accept no less. "Have dinner with me tonight at the Silver-Blood Inn, Jodis."

He watched Jodis fret a little, trying to decide what to do, looking as if she was torn whether to stay or go, crossing his fingers would say yes. When she gave him a bright smile, Thongvor knew he had her, then she confirmed it with a resounding yes. They walked her out of the museum into the brightness of the day, her eyes adjusting from the darkness.

"I will meet you there at eight tonight, milady," he said, bowing, grabbing her hand to press it to his lips, his eyes never leaving hers.

"See you then," she said, walking away to get ready for the evening.

Thongvor watched Jodis walk away, unable to take his eyes off her figure, trailing blonde hair behind her. He couldn't believe his luck, not just to stumble into such a lovely young woman, but that she was genuinely interested in him, despite their age difference.

After her bath, Mari pulled her hair up into a braided bun, letting some stray hairs fall, knowing some men like that. They had this strange desire to tuck hair away from the women they were interested in, a show of gentle intimacy without being overbearing. Slipping on her best dress, also in blue, always wanting to wear something that drew out her eyes, so the men had something to focus on, distracted. Her bust and cleavage was just enough to be enticing, but not sexually inviting. Thongvor would want a real woman, a true Nord, who knew what she wanted and had control of herself.

Stepping outside of her room, she saw him there, sipping on something at the bar, waiting for her. Thongvor must have sensed her, for he turned to see her walking down the steps towards him. His heart stopped, or was it pounding so fast, it felt that way? If he thought she was beautiful before, now she was stunning.

Thongvor kissed Mari's hand in greeting and led her to a table tucked away privately in a corner. He could do that because his family owned the place. 

"I have to admit, I was speechless for a second seeing you come down those steps," Thongvor whispered.

Mari tried to look shy, looking down at her folded hands, a smile on her face. "I'm not used to men's attention such as yours, but it... it's flattering."

"I find that hard to believe, Jodis."

The woman shrugged, having no way to prove to him otherwise. "I work a lot, I suppose."

"I understand. I used to as well, but I handed most of the business to my brother, having no interest in it."

"What does interest you, Thongvor?"

The man looked away, wistfully, lost in memories. "To be honest, I miss my sword, the feel of heated battle, honor, and glory."

"Were you in the Great War?"

"I was, during the days the Imperials were great. Now they are merely puppets to the Thalmor," he gritted bitterly. "I...I'm sorry, I shouldn't talk that way to a lady."

Mari placed her hand on his for a moment to indicate she not only understood but empathized. "I feel the same, sometimes. I lost my father in the war only to lose Talos anyway and all he fought for. It is hard to not feel some resentment."

"I'm truly sorry."

"It is OK. I was just a young girl when he died, hardly knowing him, but mother took it hard."

"I can imagine."

"A few years ago, my mother died as well, cancer they told me."

"What a tragedy!"

Conversations soon took a lighter turn as they laughed and talked about all sorts of subjects, Mari relieved that her plan was going so smoothly and so fast. She thought Thongvor would have taken more coaxing to get him interested in her. Despite that, she didn't want to rush it either, risk failing in her mission, or get caught. As the evening waned, they walked to her room as they stood there awkwardly at her door, him seemingly at a loss as to what to do. Mari could see the wheels spinning in his head, like Dwemer machinery debating if he should kiss her or not. To help him along, she leaned against the stone wall, hands clasped behind her back demurely, smiling shyly with a hint of coyness. 

"I had a really nice evening, Thongvor."

The man moved closer to her, sensing the invitation. "Can I kiss you," he finally asked.

"I...I would like that."

As soon as the man pressed his lips to hers, she felt a wave of guilt, feeling like she was betraying Nazir somehow, trying to remember it was just a job and he understood that, but it wouldn't leave her, yet she pressed on, kissing the man back. She gently pushed him away, pulling back, indicating she was done. "Thank you for the lovely evening."

Thongvor couldn't hide the disappointment in his eyes, hoping she would invite him in, but she was a lady, after all, raised right, which only strengthened his interest in her. "When can I see you again?"

"You're the one who talked me into staying," she teased. "You tell me."

The man chuckled at his mistake. "Yes, I stand corrected. Very well, tomorrow after lunchtime. We can go explore some of the countryside, take a ride?"

"I would like that. Well, goodnight, Thongvor."

"Goodnight, milady," he said, kissing her cheek and left.

Mari crawled into her bed, a smile on her face at her success so far, but she had to remind herself not to get cocky. There could be a hundred things that could go wrong, and she had to make sure not to get ahead of herself, but she still deserved a little pat on the back. Soon her thoughts took on a darker turn, wishing Thongvor wasn't such a gentleman. It was already getting difficult to remind herself that he was the bad guy. His family was just a bunch of rich thugs who hurt people, especially the Forsworn, turning them to slaves, mining silver.

Mari's vision cleared as she woke up, not recognizing her surroundings, soon realizing she was sleeping on the ground. She was no longer in her room, but a cave of some sort, no, a mine. Standing, she looked down to see she was wearing rags, and her hands were covered in filth and fresh blood. _Where am I? What is going on?_ Walking around, she could see miners using their pickaxes to dig out the ore at their feet and on the stone walls.

She felt a shove from behind, dropping her to her hands and knees, looking back, face plastered in anger to see who the culprit was. A man she didn't recognize, and Orc, a cracked tusk, scowling. "Get to work!" he yelled, throwing down a pickaxe.

Her vision went blurry once more, and when it cleared, she found herself in pain, barely able to move and could only see out of one eye. She was lying on the ground in a puddle, shivering. Sitting up, Mari tried to get her bearings, but she was in too much pain.

" _This is what is to come_ ," said the whisper. Mari was unable to tell if it was a man or woman.

"What is coming?" she mumbled, mouth swollen as she tentatively touched her lips, grimacing in pain.

" _It has been written._ "

"What has been written!"

" _Be careful…_ "

Then the voice was gone, and before she could say anything else, Mari woke up with a start, heart pounding, realizing she was still in her rented room. "What the fuck was that?" she asked no one, gasping. "That felt too damned real."

Mari wasn't going to ignore the dream. She knew deep down it was some sort of warning, but she had nothing to compare it to, never having dreams or visions like that, or whatever it was. Trying to remember what she dreamed, she recalled everything, but none of it made any sense. Regardless, she was going to be hypervigilant to her surroundings.

It had been just over a week, and Mari made great strides with Thongvor, and the time was near to end the charade and get home to Nazir and her family, pleased it had gone so smoothly. It was late as the two strolled through the town hand in hand, walking her back to the Silver-Blood Inn. Mari stopped and pulled the man to her, looking up at him shyly. 

"Thongvor, I...I have to admit I have enjoyed your company so very much. I have to go soon as I can no longer leave my business unattended."

"I know you do. I knew it was going to happen soon, but I was hoping I had more time with you, Jodis."

"Would you think less of me if...no...I shouldn't."

"What? You can ask me anything. Nothing you could say would make me think less of you," he replied, rubbing a thumb over her knuckles.

 _Why did he have to be such a damned gentleman?_ She asked in her head. "Would it be presumptuous of me to ask you to...to my room tonight?" While the two did a lot together while she was there in Markarth, there was always a guard lurking, protecting him. Getting him privately in her room was the only way where she had a particular poison for him, specially made by Babette. Mari's biggest problem was figuring out a way to give it to him, unable to just slip it in his drink because the taste and odor was a dead giveaway. Perhaps she could give it to him slowly in his sleep, drop by drop.

"I have been hoping you would ask," he said, pulling her into him.

"Do you mean it? I...I was worried you would think less of me."

"Never."

Mari rested her face on his chest as he held her and kissed the top of her head. Gently pushing her back, he grabbed her hand once more, looking back at his guard, shaking his head, and led her into the tavern. Once inside her room behind closed doors, he was on her, hands tightly fisted with her hair, pulling painfully, a heated kiss, him pressing her back roughly into the stone wall. All his charm was gone, and in its place was a man who had only one thing on his mind, pawing at her, pulling off clothes. If he were a real lover, his actions would have angered her, but she had a job to do, allowing it.

Thongvor tore her tunic, exposing breasts as he aggressively grabbed one and nibbled on the other. Now she was pissed, instinctually shoving him off of her, but he slapped her and pinned her against the wall with his body as he continued licking, sucking, biting. Mari never had any intentions to actually fuck him. She couldn't do that to Nazir, job, or no job. She had Nazir teach her the ways of lovemaking because even casting a spell, she had to know how it all worked. Working her hands out from under her, Mari pulled his head up to kiss him despite him assaulting her, distracted, she cast her spell. Before he could drop to the ground, she struggled to get him on the bed. 

While the Nord was in dreamland, she scowled at her torn tunic, one of her favorites, wiping the blood off her lips. "Asshole. And here I was starting to feel sorry for you. You're about as fake as I am, the difference being mine is a job, and you're just a jerk."

Sitting on the bed, she placed her hands on his head once more, casting her illusion spell of them fucking to prevent him from waking up, and he wouldn't want to, while she gave him the poison. Pulling off the cork, careful not to spill the contents, she lifted his head and slowly poured the liquid down his throat as he instinctively swallowed.

In a few minutes, Thongvor was no longer breathing, dead. At least he died with happy visions, not that he deserved them. Mari quickly gathered her things, throwing them into her pack, planning to leave that very night. Getting dressed, throwing on her cloak, she peeked out her door to make sure the coast was clear, everyone in bed. A sigh of relief escaped her lips as she headed out into the night.

"It's a bit late for a stroll, don't you think?" the man said, surrounded by about fifteen guards, swords drawn. 

"Thonar, what are you doing here?"

"I heard the Dark Brotherhood lost their touch, weak, powerless, but here you are doing your job properly, just as I hired you to do. Is he dead then?"

Mari played dumb, knowing it wasn't going to be believed, but she had to try, sensing a trap. "Who? Thongvor? Why would I kill him? We just went on a few dates."

Thonar laughed and walked up to her, brushing a thumb across her bleeding lip. "My brother's handiwork. I would know it anywhere." Then out of nowhere, backhanded her across the face. "Collar her," he ordered some guard who had snuck up behind her.

Before Mari could recover from the surprise slap, someone clasped a thick metal collar around her neck as she tried to yank it off. Now she was pissed, trying to cast her spells, but all she got for her efforts was a lot of sputtering then nothing, replaced by a sudden fear. The visions of her dream came flooding into her mind. She tried to be careful, but she did not prepare for Thonar's betrayal, not knowing who exactly hired the Dark Brotherhood."

"You hired me and are now betraying me. Why? Didn't feel like paying? Don't you make enough money?"

Thonar scoffed, "It has nothing to do with the money. You're just a loose end, my dear. Too bad. You are quite beautiful." Thonar grasped her face tightly between fingers and pressed his lips to hers. "I can see what my brother saw in you. Anyway, the Dark Brotherhood would have something over me, leverage, and I just couldn't allow that. With my brother out of the way, I am in charge of the business, next in line to be the Jarl."

"Greedy bastard!" Mari spat.

Thonar slapped her so hard, she dropped to her hands and knees, tasting that coppery taste, knowing she was bleeding again. 

"That coming from a Dark Brotherhood bitch? That's rich, really rich. An assassin with a moral high-ground? Ridiculous notion. Arrest her for the murder of Thongvor Silver-Blood."

"I will kill you for this!" Mari grunted, spitting blood at him.

"Honey, you will never see the light of day again, if you even survive the night. Take her to the mines. Good luck living," he laughed, walking away.

"Fuck you! I will kill you all!" she yelled as she was dragged away, unable to fight so many men or use her powers. Between her cursing, she struggled to get loose, but she wasn't strong enough. She thought of Nazir, wondering if she was ever going to see him again as angry tears slipped out down her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Hell in the mines.
> 
> I have a new story up. It's about a mercenary who reluctantly, at first, protects the Dragonborn (a young teen) and her guardian as she fulfills her destiny, but absorbing dragon souls is dangerous work. As a loner, the mercenary finds himself feeling more than he expected over the mage guardian for the Dragonborn. I have written about the mercenary Vorstag that you can hire in Markarth. I recreated in a mod his NPC and liked his appearance enough to write about him. I hope you check it out. 
> 
> [The Renegade](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26058193)


	8. Oblivion Be Damned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari finds herself in the Cidhna Mines. She plans he escape, but with her magic inhibited, forced drugs into her, she starts to doubt herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: There is quite a bit of violence in this chapter.

The guards dragged Mari through town, the people barely giving her a second glance. They continued on until they reached the entrance to the silver mine. Mari looked around wondering what was next when she felt a pommel slam into one of her kidneys, dropping her to the ground.

"That's how a good girl should always be, on her hands and knees," laughed one of the guards, the rest following along.

"She's all yours, Urzoga," said another guard.

"Well, what do we have here?" came the guttural voice of a female Orc. Mari looked up to see the Orc woman—huge and strong, with green skin. Mari was confident she could take her in a fight, but where could she go? Through the mines? The front entrance was locked. If she defeated the guard, she could steal the keys, though escaping out of Markarth could be just as tricky. No, not through the city where she would just get caught once more. 

"I see those cogs spinning in your head, so don't even think about it. I know that look of someone who thinks they can take me. Trust me, you cannot. Now strip."

"No."

Urzoga grabbed the pretty blonde by the hair, yanking her head back. "I said strip, or I will just rip off the clothes and throw you into the mines naked. I'm sure being the only female down there, and naked one, would please the male prisoners. You would provide them an endless sport."

That threat did the trick, and Mari removed her leather breeches, tunic, and boots. 

"Everything goes, including the breast band and smalls."

"I thought you weren't going to send me down there naked," Mari spat, trying to not show the fear she felt.

"OFF!" the Orc yelled, tired of this woman's yammering and not doing what she was told.

Mari stood completely naked as the Orc threw her some rags. Pulling the rag dress over her head, it barely covered her thigh and chest, so much so she may as well have been naked. Cursing the Orc, now she definitely worried about being raped down there, but at least she could still fight. If they tried anything on her, they would regret it.

"Drink this," Urzoga demanded, forcing a mug of some sort of liquid at Mari.

"What is it?"

The Orc was tired of the woman's questions. She kicked out Mari's knees from behind as she dropped, grabbing her blonde hair and dumping the contents down her throat, forcing her to swallow it all. Mari fell to the ground, coughing, already feeling the effects of whatever she drank.

"Trust me, you're going to want it being the only woman down there. It will numb things."

Worry filled her clouded mind, her vision blurring, barely able to walk in a straight line as Urzoga walked Mari down into the mines. "If you cared that much... you should have left me... lucid... to fight," she managed to get out, her body wobbling into the stone wall.

"You fight, you die. It's better to just let them do what they need to do, trust me."

Urzoga threw Mari into the mines, locked the gate, and went back to her station, leaving the woman behind surrounded by several men of various ages. Some were sitting around and others working, chipping away at silver nodes. A huge male Orc was standing by a locked gate. Mari wobbled around, her vision going in and out, unable to focus, but she tried. She had to focus, get the lay of the land and the prisoners, to be ready.

" _I can help, just call to me_ …" whispered the voice in her head, the same voice from her dreams. Now that she was awake, despite being on some sort of drug, she knew it was Mephala.

"No," she slurred.

" _You need me._ "

"I said, no!" Mari yelled, swatting the air as if to rid herself of a pesky fly.

"Well, well, what do we have here?" a man asked, sniffing her, standing entirely too close, a hand resting on her ass.

"Off, asshole!" Mari tried to elbow the man in the gut, but all that resulted in was her almost falling down.

All her outburst did was create a cacophony of laughter. Soon the ground was rushing towards her face as she felt a blow to her head, but the drugs numbed the pain, hearing her nose crunch, now grateful to the hateful Orc who drugged her. No, she would rather feel the pain, knowing worse was coming. Despite the drugs, she could feel a kick to her ribs—another crunch. Mari reached out, trying to cast her spell, forgetting the magic inhibitor around her neck, letting her hand drop limply. 

The ground quickly pulled away from her face as someone lifted her up by her hair and felt a fist to her face, tasting blood in her mouth once more, spitting. She hurt, but she knew it could be much worse, wishing she could fight back, her muscles limp. That didn’t stop her from giving the culprit a nasty look and a smirk, spitting blood in his direction.

"Throw her in one of the rooms," said a voice—old.

Mari was dragged by two men, her head rolling, trying to see as she was unceremoniously tossed against the stone wall and fell into a puddle, a vague memory passed her mind.

" _I can still help. Let me, my spiderling._ "

"Leaf meh alone," Mari mumbled, jaw swollen, probably broken. She struggled to get up but collapsed back into the puddle. The last thing she wanted was help from Mephala. Even in her drugged state of mind, she knew it would come with a hefty price. She loathed the Daedric Prince, despite the life she gave her.

Mari didn't know how many times she was beaten or how long she was there. The pain grew once the drugs started to wear off. When she was back in whatever room they threw her in, she felt someone lift her head and dump more drugs into her. "No—" Her struggles were weak, useless.

It could have been hours, days, weeks, Mari had no way of knowing as she was kept drugged. She knew she at least had been fed and given water. Her weakened body was being dragged once more and brought to a new room. She assumed it to be so since she didn’t recognize it, though it was hard to tell with her blurred vision. She hurt, but she was numb. It was a strange feeling to have both. There were no emotions, no anger, no hatred, no depression—she just was. That is what Skooma did to a person.

Lying on the ground, she saw blurred feet in front of her as her eyes moved upward, seeing a sitting man, but if anyone asked what he looked like, she would have no clue. 

"How do you like my home away from home?" the man said, the old one she vaguely remembered from the day she arrived.

"Basta…" she grunted, unable to articulate anything.

"Fiery, even now. The Silver-Blood train well, I have to admit. Too bad. You were quite the looker when you came in now not even your mother would recognize you."

"Silva… no…" Confused.

"Yes, you were captured and arrested...a gift from Thonar, one of his. It is said that you betrayed him by killing his brother because he didn't want you. You are quite a piece of work. The only reason you are still alive right now is that a Silver-Blood is dead. The fact that you are a Silver-Blood minion is why you are drugged and in pain."

"I'm no…"

"But you won't have to deal with us much longer. Soon you will be left alone with nothing but your drugged thoughts while you slowly starve to death or go crazy, whichever comes first. But I will make sure we leave you a bucket of water because I’m nice like that. Take her away," he ordered.

Mari was thrown back into her so-called room, wanting to cry, but she couldn't. She felt nothing. Even thoughts of Nazir brought her no joy or sadness. She knew she had to find a way to escape, but there was no desire to do so. It was only a sliver of innate knowledge that drove her.

She must have passed out, startled awake, feeling someone tug at her then pushing up her rag for clothing—exposing. _No, no, no_... Her drug-induced mind slowly recognized what was happening, trying to fight the man off, but her movements were slow, sluggish, and her muscles felt heavy. "No…"

" _I can stop it._ "

"No," Mari repeated to her head and to the man, not recognizing her own voice.

She could feel the man lying on top of her, rutting around, touching, exploring. "No."

"Shhh, I will go easy on you. You're so pretty, even with a smashed up face," the man whispered, brushing her hair back, kissing her face, rubbing her back as if he were a lover.

"Please…" she whimpered, feeling the tendrils of fear for the first time since she was drugged.

"It's OK, sweetie. I will be gentle. I...If I can find...dammit…" he grunted, struggling as he pulled down his torn breeches, cock hard. "You will like it, I promise."

Soon the pressure was gone as if the man magically floated off her body. A spray of blood landed on her face. She didn't know whether to be grateful or terrified, still barely able to move as she laid there looking up, but her vision was still blurry.

"Does anyone else want to rape this girl? She's a traitor bitch, and she will suffer, but we are not Nords! We will not rape our enemy's women as they do ours! Is that understood? If anyone tries it again before we leave, you will get what Grisvar got. Do I make myself clear?"

Mari heard several grunts in acknowledgment. This old man may be leaving her to die, but at least she would die with minimal dignity. 

The next time she woke up, Mari was a bit more clear-headed and in a lot more pain. The drug was wearing off, but her vision was still blurred. Her head felt like someone jammed a dagger in her brain, probably from the drugs wearing off. She saw the man she assumed tried to rape her, dead, naked from the waist down, throat cut. For the first time, she felt signs of anger, relishing in it, absorbing it like healing medicine. She used it to pull herself up, move forward and get out of this realm of Oblivion. Mari found the bucket full of water and drank greedily in large gulps as she moaned. She almost wept, realizing to her dismay they left it to keep herself drugged until she died. 

" _I can guide you out_ ," said the ethereal voice.

"Fuck off," she yelled, voice slurring as she felt the drugs take over once more, unable to control the frustrated tears.

Mari had no spells, no weapons, barely any clothes on, or able to see much of anything. She searched the mine, finding no prisoners at all, remembering the old man talking about them leaving. They had planned to leave her behind to die, starve to death. Of course, she would probably be dead before that if the guards find out the prisoners escaped, and she was the only one left. They would make an example out of her. She had to get out of there, and soon. Though weak with drugs and hunger and thirst, she looked around the mine, falling several times, for supplies. There wasn't much of anything left. She found an old tunic in terrible condition, but it covered her more than what she was wearing, pulling it over her head. There was a blanket she yanked off a bed and some sort of handmade knife. She could use a knife.

As Mari's vision cleared, she stumbled around trying to find out how the prisoners escaped, then she saw it, more like felt it, a crawl space that led to a gate, which was closed but unlocked. The prisoners probably assumed she would be too drugged to find it. When she got through, she entered a cavernous Dwemer ruin. She was already struggling to see, and the ruins were dim with only a few torches to light the way from the prisoners' escape. Grabbing one of the torches, she wobbled and teetered her way, hoping she wouldn't get lost, and find a way out. The air was stale and dusty as she coughed, moaning at the pain in her broken ribs, but the drugs were numbing once more. She limped past crumbling pillars and walls, trying not to stub her bare feet.

Closing her eyes, she sensed the familiar, and as she plunged deeper into the ruins, she started to hear the chittering, the movements. Brushing away thick and sticky webs, she saw them there in her blurry haze, two giant Frost Spiders. She had no way to draw them in magically and hoped they recognized her as a friend. Walking slowly, hands out, she put down the torch so she wouldn't frighten them. 

"Hey, ladies, it's your friend, Mari...you know, Mephala's fucking daughter." 

Mari reached out to touch one of them, and relief poured out of her as it rubbed against her similarly to how Lis did back home, but Lis wasn't nearly as big as it almost knocked her over. 

"I need your help to get me through this. Can you help me find a way out? Can you be my eyes?"

The two spiders walked off, not rushing so Mari wouldn't have to run. Grabbing the torch, she followed after them. The next chamber was filled with broken bits of metal parts she recognized as some of the metal beings she saw in the Dwemer Museum. Some were still spewing steam, assuming the prisoners that tore through there probably destroyed them. Mari counted on her good fortune, what little there was of it lately, that she didn't have to face the metal monsters in her condition.

She didn't know how long she had been following the spiders, but her feet were hurting continuously stepping on crumbles of stone. In fact, her entire body hurt after all the beatings she received. She knew she would be in a much worse state had she not trained so rigorously with Nazir.

The spiders finally stopped, moved out her way as she reached a door. Pushing it open, the woman was greeted with a breeze of fresh air and a cloak of darkness from the night sky. She petted the spiders, thanking them as they went back to their nest, dropped the torch to not draw unwanted attention, and snuck her way out of the city, sticking to dark corners when guards walked by, her head still spinning from the drugs. Water trickled through the town by way of man-made fountains and aqueducts, stooping over some water, gulping it down she was so thirsty. 

As Mari made her way out of the city, she prayed to all the gods the Silver-Bloods didn't know about Frigga, and hoped he was still there in the stables; otherwise, she wasn't sure how she was going to make it all the way back to Falkreath with no magic, food or supplies.

When she reached the stables, she nearly wept at the sight of her baby, her black stallion. He was still there and well cared for because she paid for it. She saddled him and pulled herself on his back, taking off at a quick gallop to get out of Markarth as fast as possible. She was going to miss her things, her nice clothes, weapons, but they were all replaceable. She would get new things as long as she could make it back home.

It had been over a month, and Mari still had not returned from Markarth. No word was sent of her completion, as she usually did, indicating she was on her way home. She would write to him in code in case her letters were intercepted. Nazir couldn't help but start to worry about her. _She should have been back by now!_

He couldn't remember the last time he was this worried for someone, not since Hammerfell and the very reason for the onslaught of nightmares he had been having. Not sleeping, he tried to meditate and calm his mind, but worries of Mari intruded on his thoughts. Nazir would then work on sparing with the others to distract himself. It helped for a while, but then his worrying would begin again, followed by nightmares in the evening.

As Babette watched him move back and forth, pacing in the kitchen, her patience as infinite as her age. Cracking knuckles, fists clenched, unclenched, scores of emotions running through him, clouding his thoughts. 

"Something has happened to her."

"You don't know that," Babette said.

"She should have been back by now."

"Things happen. She probably just got tied up in something. She will make it back."

"No, something is wrong. I... I am going. I can't take it anymore. I am going to go look for her," he said, pacing still. He knew he wasn't himself, but he couldn't help but worry for Mari. It was a big job, fraught with danger. _What if she failed?_

"Nazir."

“Nazir.”

“Nazir!”

"What?!"

"Sit down please, you are making my neck hurt."

"I can't! I…"

"Sit!" While Babette looked like a ten-year-old human, she commanded attention like a Queen.

Nazir sat down as he was ordered, slumping in his chair, feeling a hand rest on his. "Look at me, Nazir. This is Mari we are talking about. She is great at what she does. You need to trust her to come home safely. Remember, she's the daughter of Mephala. She will be fine."

He nodded at the Vampire child, feeling slightly better. "But how long do I wait, Babs? How much time should I give her before I go out and look?"

"At least give her a few more days. Look, I'm worried too, but she's resourceful. Even if something happened, I am sure she can get herself out of it."

"OK... OK. I will wait, but it's going to drive me crazy!"

"I know it will."

Mari slumped over Frigga, unable to push the horse faster, feeling like she was going to pass out, but she had to keep going. She couldn't stop, or she would die. With no magic, no food, no supplies other than a flimsy dagger, she knew she would die if she stopped. The woman only stopped long enough to drink water and let her horse eat a bit of grass before moving on. She didn't want to kill Frigga either by pushing him too hard.

Shaking her head to wake her up, not wanting to pass out, she spurred the horse to move a bit faster. Licking her lips, crusted with dead skin and blood, she shifted in the saddle, wincing with pain. There was no healing for her as she suffered. Looking around the terrain, Mari saw she was surrounded by thick trees, knowing she finally reached Falkreath. _Just a little bit longer_.

Her eyes slowly opened, the smell of horse hitting her nostrils, seeing she was slumped over, her head resting next to Frigga's neck. She must have passed out. The horse was eating grass, not moving. He knew the way home and wondered why they had stopped. Mari winced as she sat up, the pain nearly dropping her, and looked around to see they had made it home, and she was still alive, accepting the small victories. Sliding off the horse, she landed hard on her side, unable to maintain her balance. The tears spilled, not from being upset, though she was, but from the pain that doubled with her landing, blurring her vision. _Don't pass out. Don't pass out_

" _What is the music of life_ ," said the whispering door.

Mari hoped she had a voice still. "S...silence, my...brother."

" _Welcome home._ "

Those simple words being greeted by the door had her nearly weeping. She pulled herself up to stand, opened the door, lost her balance, and fell down the flight of stone steps, hitting her head. Mari was soon greeted with blessed blackness.

Nazir sat up in bed, quickly awake. There was no rubbing of the eyes, yawning, stretching. With his body on high-alert, something woke Nazir in the night, and it wasn't his nightmares. _Something is wrong_. Pulling on breeches, he grabbed his sword and went out into the Sanctuary, his senses honed. So far, all seemed as they should, but he walked room from room, everyone who wasn't on a mission was sleeping. He put down his sword, shaking his head, wondering what woke him and was about to head back to bed when he saw it out of the corner of his eye.

_Mari_ —Panic filled him, reaching out to her with a shaking hand. He rushed to her contorted form. She had clearly fallen down the steps. Nazir barely recognized her, her face battered and swollen, hair covered in blood and tangles, her broken and bruised body was covered in a torn and filthy tunic wearing nothing else. Afraid to pick her up, he rushed to get his family up to help him.

Nazir and Arnbjorn gently carried Mari to her bed. The Redguard cringed, hearing her moan in her stupor, knowing pure pain that could be felt even with being passed out.

"Move out of the way," demanded Babette, who forcibly shoved the men away from Mari. "I will attend to her." She was glad she had fed as Mari's blood assaulted her Vampire's nose, the pulsing of the heart that could be heard through the movement of blood.

"What did those bastards do to her?" Nazir demanded, fists clenched.

"We will find out soon enough after Babette heals her. I hope she was successful. It's clear this mission was too big for Mari," Astrid said, leaning in the doorway watching.

"Now is not the time Astrid. If I know Mari, she did her job… and paid for it," Nazir said, trying not to lash out at his leader.

"Fine," Astrid said. "Keep me posted. I am going back to bed."

He sat on her bed, holding Mari's hand as Babette poured some potions down her throat, feeling pats on his back for reassurance as the rest of his family headed back to bed. Soon the only people in the room tending to Mari were Babette and Nazir.

"What is that around her neck?"

"A collar to inhibit mages from casting their spells. I've seen them before. They are usually given to prisoners to keep those with magic from escaping," the small Vampire explained.

"Can you get it off?"

"I will leave that to Arnbjorn in the morning. The thick iron is beyond my capabilities. Let's focus on healing her."

When they were done pouring potions down her throat, Babette headed back to her own room, leaving Nazir alone with Mari. He grabbed a large bowl with warm water and a rag and started to clean all the blood off the woman he was bound to. The fears that she would die nearly paralyzed him, despite Babette informing him otherwise, saying she would be awake in the morning. The Vampire left him potions to relieve her pain when she did.

As the dirt and blood were wiped away, he could see the bruises receding, a crunch of a bone here and there, resetting, knowing the potions were working. Grief wanted to overtake him but reminded himself that she was alive—she would live. He always appreciated the bond they shared for the past six years, but that night when he saw her broken and bloody, he knew it came at a cost. He was not sure when he forgot that there was always a price to pay with closeness. Life was not kind to those who loved as it dawned on him why the Nords married out of necessity. 

He kissed her forehead, crawled into bed with her, not daring to pull her into him lest he hurt her. Nazir clasped her loose fingers in his, listening to her ragged breathing, keeping him awake as he watched her. Her brows furrowed, moved, eyes beneath lids shifted in her dreams, knowing after what she had been through, she was having nightmares. Nazir had loved Mari for a long time, just not in the same way as he did then. The love he felt for her at that moment was indescribable. He had loved once before, but not to the extent he felt for the woman next to him, and he could scarcely find his breath. 

Fist pressed to her chest, Mari struggled to breathe as she abruptly sat up, the nightmare pushing her out of her sleep as if being punched awake. It was the anger that filled her, not the desperate clawing at wakefulness after such a dream. Confusion set in as her eyes came into focus, recognizing her bedroom and wondered how she got there. The last thing she remembered was arriving in Falkreath. Gentle hands rubbed her back, seeing Nazir's concerned face, eyes filled with worry, filled with love.

"I... I'm so thirsty," her voice cracking, hoarse, unrecognizable.

Nazir didn't say a word as he rushed out of her room to get her some water. Mari gulped it down, never having tasted anything so fine as it dripped down her face and neck in her desperation to quench her never-ending thirst. She knew it was the drugs leaving her body that was the culprit. 

"Slowly, Mari... slowly," Nazir instructed. She could hear his voice full of emotion.

"What... happened. How'd I... I get here?" 

"Shhh, lie back and rest. I will tell you all I know."

Mari nodded and sat back on the pillows he fluffed for her. She was still sore, but not nearly as much as when she was riding on Frigga. "Frigga…" she said, worried, sitting up once more.

"Frigga is fine. He has been stabled, groomed, and fed."

"You found me?"

"I found you sprawled on the bottom of the steps, body mangled, at least it looked that way. It was late last night, and something told me to wake. There I found you. We carried you here, and Babette took care of you, giving you her strongest medicines. I worried you would die, but she insisted you would live." Nazir's voice cracked with emotion, but he choked it back. 

Mari had never seen Nazir so emotional despite all efforts to hide and control it. She reached a hand to touch his face as he leaned into it. "You love me."

"Yes."

"Good. I love you too. The only thoughts that kept me going were getting home to you."

Nazir coughed away his emotions and kissed her parched lips, sealing the vow to each other. If he said anything right then, he would have lost all control.

She soon filled with rage once more, sat up to get dressed, and reached for her throat, feeling the collar still there, cursing. "I'm going to kill that man! He deserves every bit of pain I give him!"

"Who, Mari...what happened to you?"

"Yes, I want to know that as well," said Astrid, standing in the doorway, neither of them heard her arrive. "I'm assuming the mission was botched."

"It was not. I killed Thongvor just as planned. My mission went off without a hitch until…"

"Until…?"

"Until his brother arrived as I was leaving Markarth. I don't know if you know this, but Thonar is the one who hired us to kill his brother. Wait… you knew?" Mari asked Astrid, first shocked, then angry.

"I knew…"

"What's going on... tell me!" Nazir demanded.

"I was set up, Astrid. Did you have a hand in this because if you did…"

Nazir looked at Astrid sharply to see her reaction to Mari's accusations. Her look was smug, but there was no guilt there.

"I did no such thing, dear. I do not betray my family. Tell me what Thonar did."

Mari nodded and explained her whole ordeal since she was confronted with Thonar and the guards. She told her story of how she was forced to strip, had drugs poured down her throat to keep her compliant, the men beat her, and there was nothing she could do about it. Nazir grabbed her hand tightly, feeling anger flood him, especially when Mari explained her near-rape. She talked about her desperation to escape, finding a way out thanks to some spiders and making her way home on Frigga. 

"How long was I gone?" she asked Nazir.

"You were a week late. I was about to go out and look for you when I received no word."

"I guess it is safe to assume you weren't paid then," Astrid asked, seemingly not to care about Mari's story.

Before Mari could give the leader a rebuke, Nazir spoke up, directing his anger for the first time at Astrid. "By Sithis, Astrid. Mari almost died, our family member and all you can think about is coin? What is wrong with you?"

"Mari is fine, as you can see yourself, my dear, Nazir. Our line of work doesn't come without risk, and she knew that going into this. That is why I gave her two months to prepare for every contingency. Even then, things can go wrong, but we still have a job to do. We still need gold to survive and do what we do, Nazir. You know this. I am not without sympathy, but this is the way of life in the Dark Brotherhood."

Nazir didn't want to agree with the woman, but he knew she was right. "Fine," was all he offered her.

Astrid turned her attention back to Mari. "Did Thonar explain why he betrayed you? Please tell me he was that stupid."

"He was, he did," Mari nodded. "He wanted full control over the Silver-Blood business and the one next in line to be the Jarl. To do that, Thonar needed his brother out of the way. I was just a loose end he needed to tie up. It was nothing personal, but I am taking it as such. He didn't want the Dark Brotherhood to have leverage against him."

"I see... smart but stupid for talking too much, clearly underestimating you. Very well, you have my permission to take the man out. No one tries to harm my family... no one." With her questions answered, Astrid left Nazir and Mari alone.

"I need to get back there, kill him!" Mari demanded, getting out of bed, but not before she nearly collapsed.

"Not yet, Mar. You need to rest first. When you are fully healed, you and I will go together."

Mari would have argued more if she weren't in so much pain and starving. 

After lunch, she finally felt her strength return and met with Arnbjorn to remove her collar. It took some time, and some pain, but it was finally off, feeling the pull of Magicka as it flowed through her veins again. The fire built up in her to near explosive proportions, letting loose flame to the unsuspecting straw targets used for archery.

"Really, Mari? I was practicing on those!" Veezara yelled.

"Make new ones... sorry. It was hard to contain."

"Do you feel better?" Nazir asked.

Mari nodded, watching her hand open and close, feeling almost whole again. "I know you don't have magic, but I felt naked without mine, vulnerable, helpless."

"Magic or no magic, there is nothing vulnerable or helpless about you." Nazir pulled her into him, holding her, inhaling her scent he had grown all too familiar with. "Despite the fact, it was a close call."

"I know. I'm sorry I worried you."

"Honestly, that you can walk away from what you went through, whole, intact... and making it home, reminds me of how strong you really are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! <3 Please let us know what you think in the comments.
> 
> Next: Secrets and Nightmares


	9. Haunting Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nazir's past comes back to haunt him and Mari struggles with how to deal with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I believe there is a part in the game that Nazir will mention something about his past he doesn't want to talk about. We never know what it is so, obviously, I made it up. :)
> 
> Thanks for reading and please let us know what you think in the comments <3

Mari moaned, fingers clenching into flesh, heat spreading through her like submerging into a warm bath. She nearly gasped for breath as she held on, riding the unstoppable wave. His lips pressed to her neck as he panted out his last efforts then stilled, falling heavily on her, but she could take it. She didn’t want him to leave, to stay as they were a moment longer. She loved the feel of him inside her even as he softened.

Nazir rolled over after a while, eyes closed. He always felt sleepy afterward, relaxed. A perfect sort of numbness. Mari rolled to her side and kissed him. Pulling her in close, his love was in total. He was unable to imagine anyone else but Mari. There was one such person once upon a time, but it was nothing compared to her, not to diminish the woman he loved once, the source of his anguish years ago. 

“How could I know the day you found me we would be like this?” she asked.

“I honestly never imagined it. Admittedly, it took me a little bit to look past the child once you got older.”

“I can understand that. I’m glad you can see me for what I am now.”

“Me too,” he said, kissing her nose. “You are mine.” Nazir placed a hand on her face then combed fingers through her messy blonde hair as she draped a leg over him.

To anyone else, it would have sounded obsessive, but to Mari, it warmed her with love to her core. “I am yours. You are mine.”

His heart sounded thundering in his ears. The pounding representative of the love he felt for Mari at that moment. “I vow to you that I will always protect you, love you. You are my blood, my bones, my flesh.”

“And I vow that I will always protect you, to love you. You are my blood, my bones, my flesh,” Mari repeated, sealing their promise and vow with a kiss. There would be no others for the rest of their lives, forever bound together.

The warmth soon turned cold as Mari’s brows furrowed in irritation. “We need to get to Markarth and kill that bastard. Let the rest of the living Silver-Blood family know that they can’t get away with betraying the Dark Brotherhood. Thonar will…”

Nazir kissed her silent. “Yes, we will do that, just not tonight.” Gentled fingers and soft kisses soothed her stormy thoughts as she settled down into him, falling asleep. 

Mari didn’t know how long they were asleep before she startled awake. Nazir was groaning, sweating, tossing. She had to remove the covers to cool her down, his body heat making her hot. Every night now the nightmares came, and every night she had to wake him from whatever terror was going through his sleeping mind.

“Nazir, wake up, love,” she whispered, gently shaking him, but he wouldn’t wake.

“Nazir,” she said more firmly.

Eyes opened, unseeing, angry. Mari struggled for breath, trying to cough and pry strong fingers off her throat, hitting his arm with a fist. As she clawed for air, spots of light formed in her eyes, her vision growing dark as the strong hand crushed her windpipe. “Na...Na…,” she gasped. In a last-ditch effort, she managed to slam a knee between his legs, the pain jolting him awake, forcing him to let go of her throat.

Mari sat up on hands and knees, gasping for air, coughing, rubbing her bruised throat. 

“What the fuck did you do that for!” Nazir yelled at her, grasping hands between his legs, trying not to vomit, not realizing what he had done. Soon that anger washed away into worry seeing her struggle for breath. “What happened…” He reached for her, but she batted his hand away.

“Mari…”

Once her breath was restored, she swallowed in pain, her throat bruised. Sitting up, he looked at her with worry and reached for her once more, but her eyes were filled with anger. It was anger he had seen before, but this time that anger was directed at him. “What…”

“No!” Mari yelled, coughing once more, wincing in pain. Her restoration spells were weak, but she tried to heal her throat anyway. It helped a little—enough to talk.

She could see the guilt on his face when he realized he had hurt her. “I did that…”

Mari nodded. “Yes. You choked me in your sleep,” she said, voice hoarse.

“I’m so…”

“No! Don’t tell me you are sorry! I know you didn’t mean it, but enough is enough, Nazir. It’s time to talk.” Mari snapped her fingers, lighting all the candles in the room.

Nazir cursed under his breath, not at Mari, but that his past, his ghosts, wouldn’t leave him alone. He reached a shaking hand to Mari’s throat, seeing the bruises already forming but withdrew his hand, unable to meet her eyes in shame.

Turning away from her, he pressed his forehead to raised knees. “My past insists on haunting me forever it would seem. How many people have I killed since being in the Dark Brotherhood family? How many lives have been snuffed out with my hands, my sword? Yet my past won’t leave me.”

“Tell me,” she said when he paused for too long. She wasn’t softening, still hurting, and angry, but her words were less biting. Nazir should have told her, talked to before letting his nightmares take control. Mari tried to be patient, but this time her lover nearly killed her.

“I was still living in Hammerfell. The Great War had ended two years prior, but the Redguards fought against the Aldmeri Dominion. We were angry at the treaty that brought the war to an end and thought it was in our best interest to separate from the Empire. So war raged on. We won, but it was hard-fought and came at a great cost.

It wasn’t enough that our people were fighting for our independence and freedom, but there were those who used a time of war and strife for their advantage. There are those that are like vultures to a carrion feast…”

Nazir didn’t lift his head when he felt Mari’s hand slide up and down his bare back. He didn’t look at her, head still down wondering how he deserved her tenderness after what he had just done. “Go on,” she said, her voice soft, so full of understanding, all her anger vanished.

“I was at that cusp between a child and an adult, having just turned eighteen. I was not a soldier, at least not yet, but I had planned to be. It was Ati that held me back. She lived in my village, so beautiful. She never asked me to stay, but I stayed nonetheless, for what good it did. We loved each other, making vows of marriage when the war was over.”

Mari sighed. She knew this story all too well. Not from personal experience, though she did lose her mother to murder, it was not an unusual one. His story was not unique, but no less painful. She rested her head on his shoulder, continuing her soothing touches.

“Surprisingly my home was untouched by the war, but that didn’t stop opportunists from raiding, stealing, killing. I had left early that morning to hunt. Ati just found out she was pregnant. She was so happy as was I, though we were so very young. Because of her happiness, I too was happy, deciding to marry her earlier than anticipated. I never saw her alive again when I left. 

My village was on fire, the women either killed or taken. Most of the men had gone to war, leaving only a few of us to defend and I wasn’t there to protect them…” Nazir’s voice became emotional, strained as he told his story.

“They had to be fed, Nazir. Surely, you aren’t blaming yourself…”   


“It gets worse,” he said vaguely. “Ati was nowhere to be found, which meant she was one of the women taken. I was angry, felt helpless, panicked, and went in search of her. Their trail led me to a fortified camp and could hear the women crying behind the wooden barricades. I knew I found her. Hope soared through me and I rushed in, stupid, out of my mind with worry. Most Redguard men are well-trained in fighting, so the bandits were nothing to me as I killed them. It was the threat of death to the women that stopped me. It was the dagger Ati’s belly that kept me from going any further. The stupid girl must have told him she was pregnant hoping he wouldn’t harm her or the baby, that they would take pity on her.

The smile on that man’s face... I knew right then Ati was dead. I watched in horror as he gutted her and saw the life drain out of her eyes. Vengeance was soon all I knew, all that pushed me. I slaughtered them all. As the rest of the women fled for safety, I went through the entire camp, but it was more than that. It also was a community, not unlike mine with women and children of their own. I... I killed them all. It went beyond eye for an eye. I left no husbands, wives... children. I…”

“You killed children? I... I thought you said you didn’t do that,” Mari said, feeling a new sort of pain she wasn’t familiar with, removing her hand from him. She wanted to call it betrayal, but that wasn’t it either. Disappointment. A gutted, deep-rooted disappointment, but a disappointment nonetheless. That was the word she was looking for.

Nazir sensed her withdrawal at his story, knowing how she would feel and the very reason he never told her, hoping to take his story to his grave. “This is why I meditate so much. I fight my demons daily. After I found you that fateful day, a young girl with a look very much like my own when I saw my beloved die. I felt your pain... you were me and I was you—bound together. It calmed me, you calmed me. You couldn’t have known, but you helped me heal. I slowly started to feel redemption in caring for you, making sure you were safe and had a home. It wasn’t until recently, loving you the way I do that it has all come back to haunt me once more. 

It has returned, I believe, because I love once more and I still have underlying fears that the same fate will befall on you. It is more than that, though. I know it is because I have held this secret tightly to me, not sharing it with you. I am afraid you will hate me, leave me. The longer I hold back, the worse my nightmares become. Now I have not only hurt you, but I nearly killed you because of it. I... I am so sorry.”

Mari felt warm tears spill down her face, not realizing she started to cry. The culmination of feelings confused her, angered her. It was the idea that he could kill children in a rage, that he had nearly killed her, kept secrets from her. Not knowing what to do with the emotions that filled her, she left him, not seeing his pain. The angered woman got dressed and walked out of the Sanctuary. All she knew was she had to get away for a while, to think about things. 

Nazir felt the tears as Mari left, not having cried since that horrible day. He didn’t call out to her, begging her to stay, or forgive him. He should have been honest from the start, to give her a choice to be with him or not before they got too deep. He ruined everything and deserved all she gave him.

Markarth and Thonar were the last things on her mind as she pushed Frigga as fast as he would go, tearing through the woods of Falkreath. She stopped crying and didn’t yell out in anger. Mari just rode as if running from her pain. All she knew was she had to get away from Nazir for a while. 

Two days later, she was standing at the door. Mari hadn’t knocked yet, deciding if she should leave or stay. She didn’t know what brought her there, what possessed her. It was as if her instincts drove her, not sure why they would do so. The farmhouse looked much the same as it had when she was there six years earlier, remembering her vision that she would need the man who lived inside one day. That need was assumed to be one of monetary value or injury help, not one of emotional support from a man she didn’t know.

After what Soren had done to her mother, perhaps he of all people would understand what Nazir had done, both men riddled with guilt. If anyone could help her deal with it, the farmer could.

Instead of barging in like she had last time, she knocked on the door. It was early evening and smoke was wafting out of the chimney, so she knew he was home. 

His dark hair was riddled with grays, a few more wrinkles than he had the last time she saw him. The man stood there and Mari could see his eyes process what he was seeing, then changed into some strange sort of combination between determination and kindness. 

Soren stared at the girl before him, now a woman, who shared the uncanny likeness of Jodis. “I knew you would come,” he said, pulling her in for an unexpected embrace, unexpected for the both of them. 

Mari didn’t return the hug, not knowing what to do with the sudden affection. “Hello,” she said as she cringed at the pathetic response.

“I knew you would come,” Soren said again, pulling on her arm to get her inside. “Come, come. You must be hungry. I have some leftover dinner you can have.” Pulling out a chair for her, Mari sat down and watched the man busy himself in the kitchen, ladling some stew into a bowl, ripping some fresh bread, putting both in front of her. “Here, I have some wine, if you want, but I no longer drink. I have it for guests, not that I get many around here.”

“Water is fine,” she said as she took a bite of the surprisingly good stew.

“Your mother taught me a few things about cooking, but she was the master at it.”

“She didn’t cook much, but for my Name Day, she would make me a nice meal. She had to save up for the ingredients.”

Guilt crossed Soren’s face. Not only had he kicked her out, but she was too poor to even do what she loved. He took that away from her too. Seeing Mari sitting at his table was a painful reminder of what he did to Jodis, but a happy one to have this girl return to him.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, eyes starting to water. 

“I know you are.”

“I’m sorry for staring, but by the Gods, you look so much like her, like your mother.”

Mari didn’t know what to say, so she remained silent.

“Tell me about yourself. What have you been doing with your life? I want to know everything.” 

Mari saw his sincerity, but she couldn’t tell him the whole truth. “After I left you I stumbled into a man. I thought he was to kill me, but he didn’t. Instead, he took care of me, trained me to fight, to survive. I have been working as a mercenary. I know it’s not the most honest work, but it pays well and I’m good at it. His name is Nazir and—” Tears finally spilled as Mari covered her face wracked with sobs.

Soren rushed to the girl’s side, sitting down next to her, patting her back. “Shhh, it’s OK. You said you would need me one day and I am here. Talk to me.”

The woman didn’t lean into his affection, but she didn’t pull away either. She told him the whole story of her and Nazir, leaving nothing out other than what they really did for a living. Mari told Soren Nazir’s story, hating to tell his secret, but she had to have someone to talk to about it all. She didn’t know how to process what she learned running on the instincts of her emotions.

“I can see now why you are so upset. I’m sure his story came as quite the shock,” Soren said when she was finished. “You love him and to find the person you love did something terrible has you questioning everything. I didn’t do something as terrible as Nazir, but it came close. My decision led to your mother’s death and you orphaned. It has plagued me for twenty years, just as your Nazir is plagued by his own demons—demons that will never leave him. Both of our reactions were done out of that pain love can inflict rendering one irrational at times. I loved Jodis more than I could ever put into words and I betrayed that love.

The fact that he is haunted by it, and painfully so, tells me he struggles with forgiveness, from himself and from you. That is why his past has returned to plague him. I’m not telling you to forgive him—only you can decide that, but to try to see his side of things. I know you hurt, but if you could give him anything, give him a chance to hear your words, whether they be words of anger or forgiveness. It appears he has been trying to redeem himself and that tells me he is trying to be a good man.”

Mari whipped away her tears, hearing his words. She had a feeling Soren would understand—understand her and understand Nazir. She still had no answers to what she planned to do about it all, but it was something to think about.

“You are welcome to stay here as long as you like. It will be welcome company. There is a spare room you can stay in.”

“Thank you,” she said.

Mari heard a soft knock on her bedroom door later than evening. Opening it, Soren was standing there with a bundle of things. “These are your mother’s. She left some things here and I never had the heart to get rid of them. There is a shift you can sleep in and some other clothes.”

She took the bundle of items, placing them on the bed. Soren was still standing there watching her. “I want you to have this. It’s your mother’s amulet, one I bought for her years ago right after we were married. I want you to have it.”

“Don’t you want it?” she asked.

“I have held onto your mother long enough. You are here now and it is time I learned to forgive myself, just as your Nazir needs to do. Until he does, he will always be plagued by his demons. Goodnight, Marianne.”

Sleep came slowly as Mari curled up in bed wearing her mother’s shift looking at the amulet around her neck, an Amulet of Mara, an amulet of love. The woman went over Soren’s words in her head until sleep finally caught up with her.

After a week, Mari felt like she was overstaying her welcome and decided to finally return home, return to Nazir. She couldn’t hide from him forever and had to face him. Nazir was probably hurting still as well. It surprised her how well she and Soren got along. No wonder her mother, even after being kicked out, still thought so highly of the man. He was a good person who made a massive and life-changing mistake. It dawned on her that was what Nazir was too—a good man with demons. 

“You’re leaving?” Soren asked seeing Mari come out of her room with her cloak on and bag over her shoulder. 

“I have to. I need to get back to Nazir. I’ve left him waiting long enough.”

“Good. I hope you can find it in you to forgive him. But if you don’t, you know where I am.” Soren pulled the woman into an embrace. “It has been wonderful getting to know you, Marianne. I hope I will have the pleasure of seeing you again.”

Mari couldn’t help but return the hug, smiling. “I will return. I can’t promise you when, but I will.”

“That’s all I can ask. Take care, girl, and good luck with your man. Trust your heart.”

The ride back was slower, so she could spend some time thinking about what she wanted to say to Nazir. The woman knew deep down she would forgive him, but they still had to talk things through. 

It was the afternoon when Mari finally returned home. A strange sort of nervousness filled her and it wasn’t the good kind. It wasn’t the kind of stomach fluttering one got returning home to love, but the kind where one didn’t want to face what was to come. 

Nazir’s back was to her, reading a scroll, sipping tea in the kitchen when she walked in. Honed instincts had him turning around, surprise and sadness crossed his eyes when he saw her standing there. “I thought perhaps you were gone for good.”

“I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“Do you hate me?”

Mari softened, dropped her bag on the ground, and sat next to him. “I don’t hate you. I was upset, angry. I needed some time to think.”

Nazir nodded, waiting to hear what she decided about them. He didn’t want to push her.

“I went to see him. I went to see Soren. I thought if anyone understood about regret, it would be him. The day you took me to see him, I told you I knew I would need him. I just didn’t think it would be for this. He helped me to clear my head, see your side of things, and understand mine.”

The man wanted to reach for her but afraid she would pull away, so he did nothing, nothing other than listen.

“I think the first thing we need to do is help you forgive yourself. You’re never going to be able to get past this until you do.”

“No, I don’t care... I only care about you—how you feel.”

He closed his eyes, feeling her grab his hand, holding it. Nazir knew right then she had forgiven him. “I am not going to lie. The idea of children being killed in a rage is... upsetting. It still is. But I know you and I know you have been trying to come to terms with it. I understand why you only take assignments that don’t kill the innocent. It is not my burden to forgive, it is yours. My only decision is can I live with it or not? I can and I will. I love you.”

Nazir gathered Mari onto his lap, holding her. If she could accept him despite his past, then he could try to forgive himself, as she told him to do. He had been pushing it deep inside, meditating it away instead of accepting it, dealing with it. The man almost lost Mari because he didn’t do that. “I love you.”

He wasn’t naive to believe things would return completely back to normal, but he didn’t care as long as she was by his side. If they could get over this, they could get through anything. “I must say, I have never received the scolding as I did from Babette and Gabriella. I didn’t tell them my story, but they know what I did to you. I got quite the earful.”

Mari laughed into his neck as he held her. “Good, you deserved it.”

“I know I did. I’m so sorry I hurt you—physically and emotionally.”

“I know you are.”

Nazir and Mari spent several days readjusting and talking. Once they felt confident enough with each other, they made their way back to Markarth to deal with Thonar. 

“I don’t like being back here. What a horrible mission that was,” Mari said. “But I’m looking forward to making that asshole pay. I want to do this Nazir. You can stay close by, but I need to do this.”

“I will be near You do what you need to do. I am only here in case that bastard tries to hurt you again.”

The two assassins arrived late so they had the cover of darkness to protect them. They were to get in and get out, no lingering in Markarth. 

Nazir swung and tossed the rope high into the air, tugging until the hook set in place. There would be no waking through the gates, their mission was about stealth. Using both legs and arms, Mari pulled herself to the top of the stone wall, sat, and waited for Nazir. Once he was next to her, they tied the rope to climb down and have an escape route.

Silently, they crept in the shadows, until they reached the Treasury House. Nazir kept lookout while Mari used an Alteration spell to open the complicated lock. She looked back at him, seeing his slight nod then slipped inside. Everyone was asleep as Mari snuck in, ears perked for any movement. Knowing where Thonar slept, Mari headed up the stairs and found his bedroom and office locked. Casting her spell once more, it opened and she walked into Thonar sleeping next to his wife. 

Mari needed a word with the man, so she cast an illusion spell on the sleeping woman so she wouldn’t wake up. 

Pulling out her dagger, she pressed it against the man’s throat watching him wake up to the cold metal biting into his flesh. Eyes fluttered open and widened seeing the masked assassin hovering over him. He looked at his wife, worried about her safety. 

“How touching. So you do care,” Mari whispered, pulling back her hood so he knew who was about to kill him.

“How did…”

“You can beat me, drug me, inhibit my magic, but you cannot stop me, dear Thonar. I have been trained by the best. For someone so smart, you are quite stupid. I could have just killed you, but I wanted to let you know that the Dark Brotherhood does not appreciate you betraying them and has given me permission to end you.”

“Please…”

“I guess your wife will run things now. I hope she does a better job of it.”

Mari slit the man’s throat and watched his life drain away. She found no pleasure in it, wishing he had just stuck with his end of the bargain, but he couldn’t be allowed to live after his betrayal. The note was laid on his chest as Mari released the spell from the wife, picked up a large bag of coin on his table as her payment, and slipped back out into the night.

Nazir was waiting where she left him, nodding that she was done. The two assassins left as quietly as they came, riding out that night back to Falkreath. As soon as they were far enough away, they both removed their masks and hoods.

“How did it go?” he asked.

“He’s dead as he should be. Both the brothers are gone and Skyrim is the better for it. I left him a note as a warning to others that one doesn’t mess with me and my family.”

The man reached for her, holding her hand as they rode home, love filling him. Promising not to keep secrets from her, and since they were alone, he decided to open up. “Mari?”

“Hmmm?”   


“I want to talk to you now that we are away from the Sanctuary. While you were gone, I did a lot of thinking. I thought of my past, what I did, but I… Well, for the first time I have been thinking about my future, a future beyond the Dark Brotherhood.”

“What do you mean?”

“Let’s camp here for the night,” he said, thinking it would be best to talk in front of a fire. “Then I will tell you all.”

As they sat by the fire, after they had a bite to eat, Nazir explained what he meant earlier. “I never expected this life. I never expected or sought out to be an assassin—neither did you for that matter. The Dark Brotherhood found me afterword spread after that fateful day. With no other options or goals, I joined them. I am good at what I do, but I’m finding for the first time that maybe I don’t want to do it anymore. What do you think?”

“Nazir, I will be wherever you will. If you would like to leave, then I am with you,” Mari explained, reaching for his hand. “We will figure it all out together, OK?”

“The Gods, I love you,” he said, pulling her in for a kiss. “I knew you would understand, but there were lingering doubts.”

“The Dark Brotherhood is my family, but you more so. I wouldn’t be here and able to survive without you. I do worry, though... does anyone leave the Dark Brotherhood?”

“I don’t know,” he sighed, “Astrid may not let us.” 

“If we just leave, do you think they would come after us? Would we have to go into hiding? I am with you, OK, but we have to make sure we have all our questions answered.”

“No matter what we decide, I am glad you are with me.”

“You are mine and I am yours,” she said, kissing him once more.

Mari and Nazir arrived home in the Sanctuary in time to hear a heated argument, not just from their family, but there was a strange voice among them. Drawing their daggers, the two rushed into the cavernous room where they trained. The two looked at each other and back at the strange man in a jester suit, voice annoying enough to send wincing pain up one’s spine.

"But the Night Mother is mother to all! It is her voice we follow! Her will! Would you dare risk disobedience? And surely... punishment?"

Mari looked at Nazir, mouthed ‘Night Mother?”

Nazir shook his head, just as confused as she was. He knew about the Night Mother, but she was here? Now?

"Keep talking, little man, and we'll see who gets ‘punished,’” growled Arnbjorn.

"Oh, be quiet you great lumbering lapdog. The man has had a long journey. You can at least be civil. Mister Cicero, I for one am delighted you and the Night Mother have arrived. Your presence here signals a welcome return to tradition,” Festus said.

"Oh, what a kind and wise wizard you are. Sure to earn our Lady's favor,” Cicero clapped excitedly.

"You and the Night Mother are of course welcome here, Cicero. And you will be afforded the respect deserving of your position as Keeper. Understood... husband?" Astrid said, her voice calm, but tinged with a coolness that indicated she wasn’t pleased.

Arnbjorn huffed at his wife, not understanding why she was siding with the little creep.

"Oh, yes yes yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Cicero said, dancing up and down.

Astrid walked up to the Jester, her eyes penetrating. "But make no mistake. I am the leader of this Sanctuary. My word is the law. Are we clear on that point?"

"Oh yes, mistress. Perfectly! You're the boss."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Guess who's the Listener?
> 
> Here on out is going to be canon...sort of. It's the main quest, but I've changed some things up because it's what I do :)


	10. The Listener

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mephala plays her game when Mari refuses to acknowledge the Daedric Prince. Now she toys with the Dark Brotherhood and makes Mari the Listener as only the Night Mother can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! <3
> 
> There are some NSFW parts in this chapter.

Astrid rubbed her face in irritation as everyone left to go about their business. When she looked up, she saw Mari and Nazir standing there. "Ah, there you are. Good, I was done speaking with that muttering fool anyway. We've got some business to discuss, Mari. Nazir, you can...go do whatever it is you do."

Nazir kissed Mari and left the two women to talk. She followed Astrid to her office for a bit more privacy. "Fuckin Night Mother," Astrid muttered.

"What's going on, Astrid. Who was that guy, and what is this Night Mother? I remember Nazir telling me something about her, but I can’t remember?"

"The Unholy Matron, the Shrouded Lady, the Mistress of the Void. She goes by many names. Ages past, Sithis gave a woman five children. She killed them to win his favor, thus becoming the Night Mother. If you believe that sort of thing. Today, she's... well, she's a skeleton. An ancient corpse. But, more importantly, a corpse that's being brought to this Sanctuary by her Keeper."

"I assume the jester is her Keeper? He just walks around with a corpse? Is there any truth to the Night Mother," Mari asked.

"A few months ago, I received word from the Night Mother's Keeper that he had arrived in Skyrim from Cyrodiil. The Night Mother's crypt, in Bravil, was destroyed. A result of the chaos caused by the war with the Thalmor. That forced a relocation. So, here he is with that... corpse. 

The Dark Brotherhood is virtually no more. We are all that is left. We have worked well as a family, taking care of each other. Times have changed, and I don't need the old ways forced back in, threatening my leadership."

Mari nodded internally, realizing the heart of Astrid's problem. She could understand her leader's worry. If the Night Mother was the symbol of the Dark Brotherhood, it could affect how well the others listened to Astrid. "So why are you telling me this?"

Astrid turned her back on Mari, leaning on the table. "Because you are the newest member and not blinded by the old ways. Neither is Nazir, but he's busy with other things. Cicero is erratic, which is an understatement. I do believe he is truly mad. But it's worse than that. I feel treachery that he's planning something. I know it."

"Are you sure you're not a bit paranoid?"

The leader barked out a laugh, "Perhaps. I hope that is all it is, but healthy paranoia has saved this Sanctuary before, and my gut's telling me that demented little fool is up to something."

"Fair enough, so what is it you want me to do?" Mari asked.

"Dear sister, I need you to steal into that chamber and eavesdrop on him. Listen to see if he's plotting, scheming. It'll be no use clinging to the shadows. He will see you for sure. No, you need a hiding place. Somewhere they'd never think to look. Like inside the Night Mother's coffin."

Mari raised an eyebrow at the woman, crossing her arms. "Seriously? That's disgusting."

"Be that as it may, we have no other choice. You need to remain unseen! Now go! Then report back to me with whatever you learn."

Mari had no time to explain to Nazir what she was doing as she made her way to Cicero's room, where he kept the Night Mother. She knew he was in the kitchens eating and entered his room, opening the upright coffin. She choked back a gag at the sight of the corpse. "This is disgusting," she whispered and climbed in. "The things I do for my family."

_She smiled, seeing her daughter hide in the coffin. All was going according to plan, the webs of fate spun and cut. Marianne will never know that she, Mephala, was playing the role of the Night Mother. She sowed the seeds of paranoia in Astrid, and soon her daughter will believe she was chosen, causing a rift between the two women._

_Her plans were years in the making, finally about to destroy the last Sanctuary of the Dark Brotherhood in retaliation for the betrayal and destruction of her beloved Morag Tong. Soon, the Dark Brotherhood would be no more._

Mari virtually held her breath, not from the stench of being a coffin, but Cicero wouldn't hear her. She could hear the little man talking. 

"Are we alone? Yes... yes... alone. Sweet solitude. No one will hear us, disturb us. Everything is going according to plan. The others... I've spoken to them. And they're coming around, I know it. The wizard, Festus Krex... perhaps even the Argonian, and the un-child... What about you? Have you... spoken to anyone? No... No, of course not. I do the talking, the stalking, the seeing, and saying! And what do you do? Nothing! Not... not that I'm angry! No, never! Cicero understands. Heh. Cicero always understands! And obeys! You will talk when you're ready, won't you? Won't you... sweet Night Mother."

Astrid wasn't wrong, he was a loon. Cicero was talking to a corpse, relieved that her leader had nothing to worry about. 

"Poor Cicero. Dear Cicero. Such a humble servant. But he will never hear my voice. For he is not the Listener," said the rough whisper coming from behind her. Mari nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard the female voice over-talking Cicero's ramblings.

"Oh, but how can I defend you? How can I exert your will? If you will not speak? To anyone!" Cicero wailed to no one.

"Oh, but I will speak. I will speak to you. For you are the one. Yes, you. You, who shares my iron tomb, which warms my ancient bones. I give you this task—journey to Volunruud. Speak with Amaund Motierre. Now, tell Cicero the time has come. Tell him the words he has been waiting for, all these years: 'Darkness rises when silence dies.'"

Mari was confused, wondering what was truly going on. Before she could think more about it, she felt almost as if she was pushed out of the coffin, landing on hands and knees. She looked up to see Cicero enraged, daggers drawn.

"What? What treachery! Defiler! Debaser and defiler! You have violated the sanctity of the Night Mother's coffin! Explain yourself! Speak, worm!"

She had to think quickly before the jester gutted her. "The Night Mother just told me I am the One and that 'Darkness rises when silence dies.'" Mari hoped that would be enough to calm the lunatic.

"She... she said that? She said those words... to you? "Darkness rises when silence dies?" But those are the words. The Binding Words. Written in the Keeping Tomes. The signal so I should know. Mother's only way of talking to sweet Cicero...Then... it is true! She is back! Our Lady is back! She has chosen a Listener! She has chosen you! Ha ha ha! All hail the Listener!"

Cicero grabbed Mari's hands and danced around in a circle as Astrid busted in, dagger drawn. "Are you alright, sister?"

"I'm fine," Mari said and explained everything that had happened. But if she expected Astrid to be relieved, she was mistaken. While she put away her dagger, Astrid's face was like marble. Mari knew her well enough that when she was like that, trouble was brewing. Her leader grabbed Mari by the arm and pulled her out of Cicero's room to talk to her privately. 

“The Night Mother spoke to me,” she said.

“She spoke… to you?” Astrid asked, the look on her face showed she didn’t believe a word.

"The Night Mother said I had to go to Volunruud," Mari explained, shrugging.

"Hmm? No. No! Listen, I don't know what's going on here, but you take your orders from me. Are we clear on that? The Night Mother may have spoken to you, but I am still the leader of this family. I will not have my authority so easily dismissed."

"Nothing has changed, Astrid."

"Everything has changed. Look. Something is happening here. I'm not sure entirely what that something is, but... Well, we need to find out. If the Night Mother really did give you an order to talk to a contact, we'd be mad to ignore it. And I think we'd both agree, Cicero's brought quite enough madness to this Sanctuary. So go. Go to Volunruud. It's a crypt, pretty far to the northeast. Talk to this Amaund Motierre. And let's see where all this leads. Hmm?"

Mari did not like the crazed eyes Astrid was giving her, but she was her leader and not about to disobey. 

"I will leave first thing in the morning."

"Good."

As she was leaving, Astrid yelled out to her. "Did you take care of that other problem yet?"

"Oh, yes," Mari said, tossing her leader a bag of coins. "The Silver-Bloods won't bother us again."

She needed to see Nazir, to hold him, feel him. Her head was spinning with all the new developments. Mari headed to his room that they now shared and pulled him to the baths.

"Where are we going? What's going on?" he asked.

"I will explain it soon."

Grateful the bath wasn't communal, she removed her armor and helped Nazir remove his. Heating up the water, they slinked in slowly as their bodies got used to the heat. Mari straddled him and grasped him. It didn't take him long to harden as she inserted him into her. "Mari… not that I’m complaining, but what’s going on?"

"Shhh, just let me have this for a moment."

She nuzzled her face into his neck as she rolled her hips, and he thrust in sync. Being on top was the only way for her as the heat spread then centralized, gripping his shoulders as lips pressed to his neck to stifle her moans. Nazir wasn't far behind, fisting her hair from behind, unable to contain himself whenever he felt her heat and pulsing.

"Do you mind telling me what is going on now?" Nazir asked once their hearts stabilized.

Mari told him everything. She told him what Astrid said and asked her to do, her spying on Cicero, what the Night Mother said, and that she had to leave in the morning. 

"The Listener? I have heard the tales, but I never believed in it. I always followed Astrid's way of leading, not really caring about Sithis or the Night Mother. This is a family, but it is also just a job. Do you know what the Night Mother wants, why are you meeting this man?"

"I have no idea, but Astrid thought it was a good idea that I do it. I'm concerned, love. I hope this change doesn't bring about a division, especially with Astrid's paranoia. I don't know how she's taking with me being the Listener. I'm not even sure I believe it, but I can't ignore that someone was talking to me in that coffin."

Nazir wiped away damp hair from her face, pulling her in for a kiss. "Well, you will find out soon enough. If the man isn't there, then I say it wasn't real."

"True."

"Do you want me to go with you?"

Mari shook her head. "No, I will only be gone for about three days."

The next morning, all packed for her trip, she kissed Nazir goodbye and headed out. She must have been distracted as she bumped into Cicero. 

"You are the Listener! You are the Listener! I have served Mother well, I have!"

The crazy man looked sad, and Mari almost felt sorry for him, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Did you want to become the Listener?"

"Oh... Well... yes. I did. I did indeed. I tried to listen. Tried so very hard. But the Night Mother never spoke to poor Cicero. The silence became almost... maddening. Oh, but that was then! This is now! You're the Listener, and the Night Mother chose you for a reason, I'm sure! Cicero will remain the happy Keeper."

Mari couldn't help but smile. The crazy jester was strangely endearing, but she couldn't figure out why, though she no doubt knew that he was deadly. "What about you, Cicero. Tell me about yourself."

Cicero looked up from his moping, a broad smile on his face. "You are so kind, Listening, to care about Cicero. Me? Oh, Cicero is just the Keeper! I... keep! I look after our matron, you see. The Night Mother. I keep her clean and protected and happy... But I am not the Listener. Oh no. You are the Listener! You heard the words! And everything will soon be put right."

The woman wasn't sure what the jester meant by 'everything will soon be put to right' or why it gave her a chill. "Well, I am off to do the Night Mother's bidding. Farewell, Cicero."

"Good luck, Listener!"

After her bath with Nazir, Mari searched for some books in the Sanctuary about the Night Mother and the Listener. Festus had one such book. When the Dark Brotherhood was at its most powerful, people could perform the Black Sacrament. Sithis would hear the pleas of those who did the sacrifice, relay orders to the Night Mother who, in turn, would tell the Listener. The Night Mother was basically a conduit between Sithis and the Dark Brotherhood. 

This Amaund Motierre is one of those who did the Black Sacrament and was heard. Mari wondered if she had never gone into that coffin, would she ever know she was the Listener? Was this fate? Was she meant to have been in that coffin at that time? The whole idea unnerved her, and she didn't like being so closely connected to Sithis. She knew the Dark Brotherhood worshipped Sithis, but Mari wasn't religious at all. Like Nazir, she did what she did for work and family, not for some strange sort of worship. Perhaps she was chosen because she was the daughter of Mephala. 

Mari didn't know how close to the truth she was, but not in the way she believed. Because Mari wouldn't voluntarily accept Mephala, the Daedric Prince was forced to find other means. What better way than to destroy the Dark Brotherhood from within.

Looking on her map, she tried to find the Volunruud ruins, apparently close by. Tying up Frigga, she walked around until she found a large mound protruding from the ground. Climbing it, she saw ancient stone steps leading down to an ancient iron door. Mari didn't spend a lot of time in ruins, if at all, only because that was not where the living lived. She took lives, not rob graves. 

When she pushed the doors open, her nose was assaulted with a stench of death, but not the recent kind, but it was stale and dusty. The air was thick and warmer than it was outside. Walking in, the place was lit with torches not that she needed fire to see, her keen eyes saw just fine in the dark. Assuming Amaund lit the torches, she followed the short path to another ancient door. Inside stood a short man, dressed too elegantly for delving into ancient ruins. Next to him was some guard, probably to protect him should the Dark Brother turn against the Breton. 

"Your pleas have been heard," Mari said to the man.

"By the almighty Divines. You've come. You've actually come. This dreadful Black Sacrament thing... it worked. I won't waste your time. I would like to arrange a contract. Several, actually. I daresay, the work I'm offering has more significance than anything your organization has experienced in, well, centuries."

"Contracts are good."

I want you to kill several people. You'll find the targets, as well as their manners of elimination, quite varied. I'm sure someone of your disposition will probably even find it enjoyable. But you should know that these killings are, but a means to an end. For they pave the way to the most crucial target. The real reason I'm speaking with a cutthroat in the bowels of this detestable crypt. For I seek the assassination of... the Emperor."

If Mari wasn't such a professional, she would have started choking in surprise. Despite the fact, it was still evident on her face. "The Emperor? Of Tamriel? You want us to kill the Emperor. Why?" The woman was good at what she did, but an Emperor?

"Yes. You do not need to know why or the details. I did the horrid Black Sacrament, and you are to do the job." Amaund nodded to his guard, who stepped forward, pulling out a scroll and an amulet. The sealed letter will explain everything that needs to be done. The amulet is quite valuable—you can use it to pay for any and all expenses."

She found it hard to believe Astrid would agree to such things, but Mari recalled talking once to Nazir about being a part of the Dark Brotherhood and how they helped topple kingdoms or usurped thrones. Perhaps this was what the Dark Brotherhood used to be all about, the Night Mother signaling the return to the old ways. She wasn't sure she liked the idea.

Listening to him complain about the filth of the place, watching him leave, she didn't know why a dread filled in the pit of her stomach. The whole thing felt off. She didn't think Amaund was lying, but killing an Emperor was no small thing. What she knew about Titus Mede II was that he was the one who signed the treaty between the Imperials and Aldmeri Dominion, ending the Great War. While many were happy to finally be at peace, it came at a cost and the loss of Talos to the Nords. To most, the treaty didn't symbolize peace but gave in to the Aldmeri's demands—the very reason the fighting started in the first place. There was an understanding as to why someone would want the Emperor dead, but why now?

As promised, Mari was back in Nazir's arms. She came home late and was fortunate that Astrid was already asleep, so she didn't have to talk to her. She wanted to tell Nazir everything, get his input on what she discovered, and what the plan was, along with her concerns.

"This is a big job, the biggest you have ever done. I don't like it, Mari. I couldn't care less about the Emperor. His decisions are what led to Hammerfell seceding from the Empire, and well, you know what happened. I have no love for the man, but dammit, you are mine. I don't want anything to happen to you!"

"The whole thing stinks, Nazir. I can't place my finger on it—call it gut reaction. But I'm going to have to do this, aren't I?"

Nazir laid on his back, staring at the ceiling. "I thought of leaving at one point. We talked a little bit about it, but now? I don't see a way out of it."

Mari groaned in frustration. "I was afraid you were going to say that. First, this Night Mother business and I'm some stupid 'chosen one' for the Dark Brotherhood. It's getting ridiculous."

"I'm going with you."

"No, I am not going to risk you too. Just let me get this crap over with."

"I love you, but that kind of attitude is going to get you killed, and you know it," Nazir scolded.

"I know. Just let me complain."

The Redguard chuckled, holding her tighter. "I'm still going with you, and there is nothing you can say that will change my mind. Of course, that's up to Astrid."

In the morning, Mari handed the scroll over to Astrid, who read it several times before rolling it back up. "By Sithis, to kill the Emperor of Tamriel... The Dark Brotherhood hasn't done such a thing since the assassination of Pelagius. As a matter of fact, no one has dared assassinate an Emperor of Tamriel since the murder of Uriel Septim, and that was two hundred years ago.. _._ I don't know exactly what's going on here if you're the Listener, or this is some fluke, or what. But what we now have before us..." Astrid couldn’t finish her thought. She could feel her whole comfortable world changing.

"So, are we doing this?" Mari asked.

Astrid nodded, "You're damn right we'll accept it. If we pull this off, the Dark Brotherhood will know fear and respect we haven't seen in centuries. You think I'd abandon an opportunity to lead my family to glory?"

Mari was afraid Astrid was going to agree to the mission. It was too big to pass up, but Mari had hoped there would be a chance that Astrid would turn it down, still unable to get past the dread she felt. 

"Not ready to make history, ' _Listener_?' Astrid asked, a smug look on her face. 

"Honestly, Astrid? No, I'm not. This is big, and the Dark Brotherhood isn't what it used to be. I have a bad feeling about this," Mari said, deciding to be honest. "Do I have a choice?"

"None."

"It figures."

"You're the one who chose to be the Listener, my dear."

"I... I did not choose to be anything! Fine, whatever. What do I need to do?"

"You, my delicious thing, are going to a wedding," Astrid explained.

"A wedding? Seriously... no wait, don't tell me. I slit the throat of the groom," Mari scoffed.

Astrid chose to ignore the sarcasm. "Even better. You've got to kill the bride. At her wedding. And they say romance is dead."

"Apparently it is—"

"The bride-to-be is Vittoria Vici, who oversees the East Empire Company's business holdings in Solitude." Astrid stood close to Mari, eyes that conveyed if she fucked it up, Mari would be the one dead. "This is to be a public kill. We are to make a statement. You are to kill her as soon as she makes her speech to her guests. You get to choose how she dies."

"Why her?" Mari sighed.

"Simple. First, Vici is the cousin of the Emperor. Shock value, my dear, that and her death will bring the Emperor to Skyrim."

Mari and Nazir packed all that they would need for the trip and their escape while discussing contingency plans. 

"We will get there a day before the wedding. It will be a good time to scope out the area, see vantage points, where guards will be stationed, and escape routes," Nazir instructed. "Look, I know you are worried, but that is why I am going with you. We need to be watchful of everything, including betrayal. Remember what happened the last time in Markarth."

"I was there, Nazir! How could I forget?"

He pulled her in close, holding her. "This is only the beginning, love. We need to be prepared, and you need to be calm. I know you're worried, but we can't let anything get by us."

Mari nodded into his chest. "Are we starting a war?"

"I don't know—maybe. I think this is probably more of a power grab."

"Come on, Nazir. Even power grabs can result in a lot of death. I don't care about this Emperor, but if it starts something, like a war, that's on us. War kills a lot of innocents."

"You are not wrong."

"What would I do without you?" she said, kissing him. "Well, it's not like I have a choice."

Mari loved Solitude. It would be a place she would have loved to live had she had a normal life, though she had to admit, after years of being an assassin, it was hard to imagine being a wife—domesticated. If she and Nazir moved on from the Dark Brotherhood, mercenaries would be more likely for them.

The couple was dressed in finery, playing nobles to fit in with the city. They were walking arm in arm as any couple in love might.

"I know we have a job, but if we finish early, do you think there would be time to go shopping?" she asked as they walked by some quaint shops. She loved to buy beautiful things when she had the chance. 

"Mari…" he sighed, then chuckled. "If we have time."

"Thank you," she said, pecking him on the cheek.

The whole city was busy decorating for the big wedding. Banners were being hung, fresh flowers put in pots. Everyone would be celebrating, even if they weren't allowed to attend. Mari didn't know why that saddened her.

The two walked the ramparts, as people were allowed to do, inspecting every inch. On the day of the wedding, no one would be allowed up, and Mari had to either find a way up there or hide out until the ceremony began. 

"We could push that statue on top of her. It looks unstable," Nazir suggested.

"Actually, I have a better idea and one that will take the suspicions off of us."

"Oh,"

Mari nodded, "I have thought about it. When Vittoria is doing her speech, her husband will be right next to her. All I have to do is cast a strong frenzy spell and a mental suggestion, and he will do the work for us."

"Clever girl. That sounds perfect."

As promised, since they finished early, Mari went shopping. She bought a new tunic, another silky robe, and a pair of gold earrings.

Early the next morning, Mari was hiding above on the ramparts, surprised there weren't more guards, most protecting from down below. After the wedding, the crowd gathered in the courtyard, getting ready for the celebrations. That was when Vittoria Vici would give her speech, and it would all be over. 

There was laughter, hugs, handshakes, gift-giving, and a lot of eating. Once all the guests were settled in their seats, Vittoria and her new husband went up the steps to a balcony that overlooked the crowd. She held the man's hand and started to give her speech. Mari cast her spell on the new husband, eyes rolling into her head as she sent the suggestion Vittoria was his enemy. There was no warning, no indication he would lash out at his new bride when he pulled the guard's sword and killed her. 

It worked perfectly as the husband was hauled away for the murder of his wife. He was weeping, begging for people to believe him, but there were hundreds of witnesses. Mari slipped out unseen and met Nazir, who was waiting for her at the stables with their horses.

Mari and Nazir had never seen Astrid so happy, her smile broad at the news about the death of Vittoria Vici. "Ha, ha! The news is everywhere! Vittoria Vici, the Emperor's cousin, butchered at her own wedding, and by her own husband no less! Well done! Let's see his eminence try to ignore this."

"What do we do now?" Mari asked.

With the Emperor's arrival in Skyrim now a certainty, the Imperial Legion will need to begin its preparations immediately. Security is being handled by a man named Gaius Maro. His job is to travel throughout Skyrim, and ensure each city is prepared for Mede's visit. You must find and kill Gaius Maro. Doing so will disrupt security sufficiently that we will be able to, eventually, get to the Emperor.

"Go see Gabriella. She will have all the information you need to complete your next mission."

"How much time do I have because Nazir and I need some rest from our long journey."

"You have one day."

_Great, one day_. She and Nazir were going to have to make up for personal lost time, rest, and head back out again. 

"It would have been nice if Astrid sent us to Dragon Bridge straight after Solitude since it is less than a day's ride from there, but oh no. We had to come all the way home and have to go all the way back," Mari complained, repacking her bag, so she didn't have to do it later.

Nazir stood behind her and nibbled her neck. Mari brushed him off, but it didn't dissuade him as he bit her again.

"Nazir! This is important!"

"So is this," he said, turning her around and pressing his lips to hers. 

Nazir just had that way about him. He could turn her into melted snow when he tried—Oblivion, he could melt an iceberg. The fire of anger simmered down while he inflamed another, one of desire. Slipping a hand inside her breaches, he reached for her most sensitive spot as she moaned. "No fair."

"It's all fair," he chuckled.

What started off as something to calm Mari soon turned into a heated, rushed mess as clothes were flung, hands rapidly exploring skin, nibbles turned to bites, fingers scratching as he quickly plunged into her. In their heat, both finished entirely too fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: How not to do your job


	11. Change of Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari and Nazir have other ideas instead of killing Gaius Maro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let us know what you think down in the comments <3

Mari got dressed after spending some alone time with Nazir and headed to Gabriella's room to get her next assignment. She knocked on the door, and when she heard the 'come in,' she walked in on the Dunmer feeding Lis, the spider, Skeever for dinner.

"Hi, Gabriella," Mari said, Lis ignoring her food, making her way to the woman and rubbing against her. It was as if the spider knew Mari was Mephala's daughter. "And hi to you, too, Lis!" 

Gabriella sat at her table and brushed her long black hair before bed, watching her sister and her pet. "Dear sister, I've been waiting for you. Your next contract awaits, as I'm sure Astrid indicated."

"Yes, she said you have the details for my next job."

"Indeed, I do. With the Emperor's arrival in Skyrim now a certainty, his security service, the Penitus Oculatus, will need to begin its preparations immediately. Security is being handled by a Commander Maro. Astrid and I have devised a plan to break the man, and in doing so, cripple the Emperor's protection. You are to slay the commander's son, Gaius Maro, and once he is dead, plant false evidence on his body implicating him in a plot to kill the Emperor."

_ His son? _ Mari kept her face a blank slate, something Nazir had been teaching her, not wanting to show the Dunmer her concern about murdering a man's son. "I understand," was all she could get out without getting emotional. Mari wasn't naive, but Vittoria Vici was stressful enough, and she was afraid she was going to fail this mission.

Gabriella continued to brush her hair as if she didn't have a care in the world. "He is set to leave the Penitus Oculatus outpost at Dragon Bridge and inspect each city's security in Skyrim. Go there now. Observe Gaius Maro's departure, and follow him. Waylay him in one of the cities, and send his soul to Sithis. Once he's dead, plant the incriminating letter on his body, and let fate take care of the rest. Oh, and one final thing..."

"Yes?"

"Kill him in one of the other major cities he'll be visiting. There, the body will be discovered quickly, as will the letter implicating Gaius Maro in the plot to assassinate the Emperor. It will speed up the process if he is discovered."

Mari had to carefully choose her words when she asked her next question, trying to convey an air of indifference. "So what does killing Gaius accomplish? Why don't we just kill Commander Maro?"

Gabriella waved a hand at Mari's naivety. "Killing Commander Maro would do no good. Someone would merely replace him. No, we need him to remain in charge, but distracted—weakened. Implicate and kill his son Gaius, and the commander will be grief-stricken and humiliated, his family name ruined. The security plan will then fail. Best yet, the Emperor will be lulled into a false sense of security, thinking an assassination plot had already been discovered and foiled."

"It will be done," Mari said, leaving Gabriella's room, trying not to run to Nazir. 

"Let's go for a walk, love. I need some fresh air," she said when she entered their room.

"I just started reading my book," he said, not looking up from his story.

Mari put an edge to her voice without having to explain it to him directly. "Nazir, love. I would really like a walk and spend some time alone with you before I leave tomorrow."

Nazir looked up from his book, a confused look on his face watching her head nod towards the door. "OK, sounds good," he said, getting a clue.

Hand in hand, they walked the woods in silence until Mari felt they were far enough away. She didn't want to risk telling Nazir her concerns and what she had planned. Strong arms pulled her into him as she rested her head on his chest, wrapping her arms around him.

"What's this about, sweetheart?"

"I trust you more than anyone, you know that, right? Do you trust me?"

The man lifted her chin to look up at him, seeing the worry in her eyes in the moons' dim light. "What's going on?"

"Do you trust me?"

"With my life."

"I can't do it, Nazir. I can't kill a man's son, apparently, his only child. I...I can't do it."

"Is that what Gabriella told you to do?"

Mari nodded in his chest. "Yes, I am to kill Commander Maro's son, the man in charge of the Emperor's protection. I get it. I see why it is necessary to get to the Emperor but to kill the man's son. I... no. I can’t."

"Tell me everything Gabriella instructed you to do," he said. He listened as she told him everything. "You said you have a plan, right?"

"Yes, I want to run it by you and see what you think. I mean, if you tell me to kill this man, I will, but I'm going to struggle."

Nazir kissed the top of her head and held her, letting her know he would support her no matter what. He hated to see her this way, and he had the first pangs of guilt that he ever brought her into the Brotherhood. "What's your plan."

"It's going to be complicated," she said and told him what she had in mind step by step. They talked a good hour, hashing out the details before they headed back inside the Sanctuary. Mari felt better already with a plan in the works without having to kill the young man. While Nazir had his first feelings of guilt, Mari had her feelings of doubt that she wanted to be an assassin any more.

As much as she wanted Nazir to go with her, and he tried, Mari had to do this mission alone. It was already complicated enough and didn't want to take any chances. She knew he would worry, but she had no choice. The risk was too high that she would get caught, and she didn't want Nazir to risk his life if she could help it by not having him directly involved. 

Dragon Bridge looked like any other village dotting the Skyrim landscape, but it was unique due to its namesake. A massive and ancient bridge connected two lands over a rushing river. It looked to be from the Merethic Era and surprisingly well cared for. As she crossed the bridge, Mari hid in plain sight as she rode on Frigga and into the village. 

Her heart nearly lept when she saw Commander Maro outside of the Penitus Oculatus Outpost talking with another soldier and a pretty young woman who was crying. Mari jumped off her horse and strolled towards them in an attempt to eavesdrop.

"Father, you worry too much. I'll be fine," Gaius said.

Commander Maro was clearly upset his son was leaving and embarking on a dangerous journey. "I know you will, but all the same, remember everything I said. Stay alert, and when you get to the cities, make your observations and move on."

"I understand, but you're being paranoid. I'm inspecting security, not charging off into battle. There's not a lot that can go wrong."

**"** Son, when the Emperor's safety is concerned, anything could go wrong. Off with you now and good travels."

"Farewell, father. I'll return as soon as I'm able." Gaius and his father embraced before he turned to the woman and hugged her as well. 

"Well, this is it, then. Look after yourself, Gaius. You're doing your duty, and I'm proud of you. But you'd better come back to me. You hear?" she nearly sobbed out. 

"Oh, Faida. I may travel alone, but you know I carry you always in my heart. I'll see you soon." The son pulled the woman to him once more and kissed her. Soon he was on his way, leaving behind a weeping woman and his father trying to control his worry. 

Mari headed to the Four Shields Tavern to rent a room. Her plan was to break into the Outpost later that night and steal Gaius's schedule. The last thing Mari expected was the crying woman to be the innkeeper. She rented a room and ordered some dinner. There was nothing out of the ordinary in regards to Mari. No one knew who she was and what her plans were. 

Later that evening, with her armor on, she snuck out into the dark of night. A few wandering guards with torches were visible, but all was quiet. Sticking to the shadows, she reached the Outpost to find an Imperial Soldier standing guard. Her eyes rolled up into her head as she sent her spell to the man. He yawned and stretched, feeling suddenly sleepy. The soldier walked over to the chair on the porch and took a nap, per her suggestion. 

The door was open, and she assumed it was because they were specialized soldiers and could take care of themselves. Mari was relieved to find the men took care of the place, and the hinges on the door didn't squeak, giving herself away. Several soldiers, as well as Commander Maro, were all sleeping in bunks. Not wanting to risk them waking, she cast her spell on them too, encouraging their minds to sleep deeper. Now she could move a bit freer as she looked around for scrolls or documents. A small table contains a couple of folded parchments, opening them, one was Gaius' schedule.

Mari wished she could have just followed the young man, but she didn't want to risk it. It was better to catch up to him before he reached a major city. If she missed him at one point, she could catch him at another. Stuffing the schedule inside her armor, she left and got on Frigga, riding out into the night. As soon as she was far enough away, the spells would be broken, none the wiser.

Dawn was approaching, and there was no sign of Gaius. Despite him having a head start, he was on foot, so she had hoped she would have caught up with the young man while on horseback. At least she had his schedule, and there was a good chance she could cut him off before he reached the next city. Because Gaius was nowhere to be seen and Solitude was his first stop, Mari assumed he had already come and gone. That left dreaded Markarth next on his list. After what happened to her in the Dwemer city, she hated going back there, but she had little choice, hoping to get the man before he reached it.

Assuming the soldier would stick to the roads, that is what she did as she steered Frigga on the main road towards Markarth. Mari took into account he had camped, so he shouldn't be too far, and she was correct when she saw a solitary figure walking down the road, large pack on his back. As she rode closer, she could see the Imperial uniform. A sigh of relief escaped her lips as she quickly met the man. 

Mari jumped off of Frigga and pulled the horse as she walked up to Gaius. He looked at her, more curious than concerned. The man should have been more on guard, and if she were anyone else, he would have been dead already. Because the assassin was still wearing her Dark Brotherhood armor, Gaius should have been at least wary, but he seemed not to recognize it.

"Good morning," he said.

"Morning."

Mari felt terrible with what she had to do, but at least the young man would live. First, she was going to try to reason with him, but if that didn't work, she would have to do some kidnapping.

Gaius was a handsome young man and so young—so innocent, and as young as she was. It would have been a waste to kill him. 

"Is there something I can do for you," Gaius asked, curious now why a woman was walking along with him.

"Yes, there is. Can we stop for a moment and talk?"

"I really have to be on my way. I don't have time to waste."

"This is important, and you're going to have to make time. It's a matter of life and death."

Gaius stopped and looked at Mari, concern in his eyes. "You don't look like it's life and death."

Mari smiled, pleased to know he was at least somewhat observant. "Aren't you clever. It's your life that is at risk." She held up a hand as he began to draw his sword. "If I was going to try to kill you, you would already be dead. Still your hand."

"OK, I'm listening."

"Your life is in danger. I am part of the Dark Brotherhood, and I have been hired to kill you. Before you react, listen. As I said, you would already be dead. Someone wants you dead because they want your father to be thrown off-balance and not do his job. To do that, they want his only son dead."

"I don't understand. Why do you even care? You're a killer," he said, with more calmness than she expected. Perhaps he was smarter than she gave him credit, or more stupid.

"Believe it or not, even though I am a hired assassin, I don't kill indiscriminately. I don't want to kill you, have Commander Maro lose his only son. I also have to go through the rest of my mission. I am telling you that I am risking my own life with the Dark Brotherhood by doing this. If they find out I didn't kill you, they will most assuredly kill me. I am telling you this, so you understand what is at risk, what I am risking for you."

"I'm listening."

Mari nodded, relieved that she didn't have to kill him because he chose to fight her. "I need you to come with me and go into hiding for a while. You aren't going to like this, but we have to give your father the impression that you are dead and are involved in the attempted assassination of the Emperor—"

"Whoa, hold on! No! That would destroy my father, even if I wasn't really dead... and the Emperor! Is that what you have planned?"

"I'm not going to lie. This will be a tough decision for you to make, but think about the alternative."

"If you can choose to not kill me, then choose not to kill the Emperor," he said, arms folded, his face no longer curious, but angry.

"I have thought about it, but I will be dead if I don't. There is no way around it. I am sorry to say, I will choose my life over his. Despite the fact, the man deserves to die. He has destroyed so many lives, made enemies out of the Nords because of his decisions. The Great War was a complete waste... all those soldiers, soldiers like you chose to fight against the Aldmeri Dominion, against their demands only to balk and give in to all their demands. All the fight was for nothing. All those lives lost were for nothing. There are talks of civil war, and we want to prevent that. We can do it with the death of the Emperor. Look, I'm not going to keep trying to convince you. You have a decision to make. You can either come with me and live, return to your father when this is all done, or you can—well, you know the alternative. You cannot fight me. You do not stand a chance."

Gaius looked away, lost in thought. At least he wasn't preparing himself for a fight. "It seems you are leaving me with little choice."

"I'm sorry. I wish I had better options for you, but I have to do my job, and I want you to live. When it is done, I will return to you and send you back to your father. Then you can tell him everything that happened," Mari explained.

"I do want to live. I have a girl, and I love her and my father. They will hurt for a while, but it will be worthwhile to know they will see me again. Do you know how long I will have to be in hiding?"

Mari shrugged, "I don't know. Perhaps a month, longer? I will do my best to do my job as quickly as possible, but things can go wrong."

"You seem to be missing one part of your story. How to prove to my father I am dead."

"No, I have thought of everything, I hope. Come, get on Frigga, and we will head to the hiding location, and I will tell you all about it. We have no time to waste."

"Where are you taking me," Gaius asked, riding behind Mari on the horse. 

"I have a place, a small house located between Morthal and Solitude. It's secluded, teeming with fish and game, my partner should have it stocked with supplies for you by now. So, you shouldn't have any worries about starving or freezing."

"Can you trust this person?"

"He's my beloved. He saved my life once, so yes, I trust him absolutely."

They rode in silence for a while. Gaius lost in thought, thinking about all that was asked of him, how much he had to sacrifice to stay alive, and not unduly hurt his father. If he died, he knew it would crush his father. They were very close, especially after the loss of his mother. 

"Can you tell me how you plan to...fool my father? He's a brilliant man."

"I know how smart he is. I'm sorry to say, Gaius, but it is a life for a life."

"I see. Someone has to die for me to live." It was more of a statement than a question.

"I'm afraid so. If it's any consolation, it will be a criminal."

"My father will be able to tell it wasn't me as the body."

"I'm aware. Are you sure you want to know all the grisly details?"

"I suppose not," he sighed.

"I will need something personal of yours, an amulet perhaps—something that ties you to the body that will leave no question in your father's head that you are dead."

Mari could hear Gaius take a shuddered breath.

"It was my mother's amulet. Please, please take care of it. It's all I have left of her."

"I promise," she said, grabbing the amulet and putting it around her neck and inside her armor. "I...I lost my mother too. She was taken from me when I was young." Mari pulled out her own amulet to show him. "This was my mother's."

Traveling through the ice flows and marshy land was tricky to maneuver. Gaius and Mari had to walk, carefully pulling Frigga, so he didn't fall into the water. In the near distance, the tiny house was visible. Nazir told her it was owned by the Dark Brotherhood, but that it hadn't been used in years, so Gaius should be safe from discovery. He promised to have it cleaned and ready for Gaius by the time she got there. 

"It's small, but it will be warm, and you should have all the supplies you need," she said.

As they entered the small house, she was shocked to see someone there as she drew her daggers, but she soon realized it was Nazir.

"Nazir!" she yelled, running to him and jumped into his arms, kissing him. "What are you doing here? I thought we agreed you would let me handle this. You are risking your own life in helping me more than you already have.

"Do you think I care—"

"I care," she snapped, pushing away from him.

"Mari, I'm not going to let you do this alone. I'm sorry. If you get caught or suffer, I will be right there with you. Besides, if they find out what you have done, they will already know I was a part of it since we are together. They will blame me then kill me regardless."

Mari melted into him, holding him, loving him. She was afraid for his life, but she knew there would be no swaying him.

"Is this him?" Nazir asked.

"Yes, this is Gaius."

Nazir gave a curt nod to the soldier. "She has told you all, yes?"

"Yes, though I really haven't decided to thank you or curse you. No matter how you slice it, my father will suffer, then there is the— Well, I don't have much choice."

"Understood."

"I've already got Gaius' replacement," Nazir informed her.

"You're too good to me."

The last thing Gaius would have believed was that assassins actually loved or cared about anyone other than themselves and gold. Between their affections and them risking their lives for him, completely changed his views. Perhaps the couple was just unique.

Nazir looked at the man once more, waving arms across the room. "I have you all set up. Wood for fires, blankets, pillows, some change of clothes, several books, food, a couple of extra weapons. You are to kill anyone who tries to get in, is that understood?"

"Yes. What if it is you or her?" Gaius asked.

We will have a special knock. Nazir rapped his knuckles two times, a pause, one time, then three times on a table. "You hear that you will know it is one of us."

"Yes, and by the time we reach you, it should be over," Mari said. "You will be able to return to your father and woman. And please, please, do not leave here. If my family finds out you live, the three of us are dead."

"I won't leave."

"If... if something should happen to my partner or me, I left contingency plans with someone... a friend outside of the Dark Brotherhood. In two months' time, if he hasn't heard from me, he will get you."

"OK, good, I was going to ask."

"I guess this is it, Gaius. I wish you luck, and I will hopefully see you in a month's time."

"I'm not going to tell you the same, but thanks for my life."

"We didn't do it for appreciation," Mari said, as she grabbed the soldier's bag and armor he had already removed, which would be needed as further evidence.

Outside of the house, Nazir pulled Mari into him again, holding her tightly. The wind was gusting over the islands and water, the cold damp air penetrated their bones.

"There's no turning back now," she said.

He kissed the top of her head and just held her, afraid for her, for her life. But he was going to do whatever it took to keep her alive and their family from finding out. "I hate to bring this up, but what about the Night Mother? Since we now know she's real and speaks to you, surely she will know what you are up to."

"I have thought about that, but fuck the Night Mother. I didn't ask to be the Listener. What is she going to do? She only speaks through me and no one else. Who is she going to tell? Besides, I believe all she cares about is the end game. Did the Emperor die? As long as that task is done, I think she and Sithis should be satisfied. The Dark Brotherhood has never cared about the how's before unless there was a specific purpose, why start now?"

"True. I trust you."

"Where do you want to plant the corpse with the amulet and incriminating evidence?" Nazir asked.

"I think Morthal since it's the closest. I will burn the corpse unrecognizable, then we can put the amulet in his bag along with the evidence.

Mari and Nazir were greeted with a distressed Astrid, pacing back and forth, as soon as they walked into the Sanctuary. Neither Mari nor Nazir had seen Astrid so upset and tense. 

"It's about time you got here!"

"What's going on?" Mari asked. 

"I know Maro is dead, but that doesn't matter right now. We have bigger problems. The fool went absolutely berserk! He wounded Veezara, tried to kill me, and then he fled. I knew that lunatic couldn't be trusted. Look, we've got to deal with this situation. You've got to deal with this situation."

Mari and Nazir were exhausted from their travels, but unfortunately, rest would not come. They had to deal with the madman. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to find that miserable little fool and end his life! But first... find my husband. Make sure he's all right. After the attack, Arnbjorn flew into a rage. When Cicero left... Arnbjorn went after him. They disappeared into the wild. Search Cicero's room. Maybe there's something in there that sheds some light on where he might have gone. Let me know the minute you find something. I've got to see to Veezara, and calm everyone down."

"I'm going to check on everyone, sweetheart. You go look through Cicero's room," Nazir said.

As Nazir ran off, Mari grabbed Astrid to ask her a couple more questions. "Astrid, wait. Nazir can handle things for a minute. I need more information."

"Fine, what?."

"Do you have any idea what set the crazed jester off?"

"No, nothing. At least nothing I'm aware of. Well... If I'm being honest, I haven't exactly been discreet lately in expressing my frustration with this whole situation. Obeying the Night Mother. You being the Listener. It's ridiculous. No offense. Cicero may have overheard me talking to one of the others about the Night Mother. It's possible I was... not entirely respectful. But to go this far. 

Look, the Dark Brotherhood is a family. This Sanctuary is a family. And, we've always welcomed those... shunned by society. Werewolves, wizards, eternal ten-year-old vampires. What does it matter? In truth, I've rarely met a lunatic I haven't liked. Cicero's problem isn't his madness. It's an adherence to an ancient, outmoded way of life. The Night Mother's ways are simply not our ways. He just couldn't accept that." 

Mari understood Astrid's paranoia and her feelings that her leadership role was threatened. If she knew Astrid, the leader was most likely intentionally sowing seeds of doubt against the Night Mother and Cicero—a desperate grab at retraining power and control. Because of that, Astrid inadvertently started a war in the Dark Brotherhood between believers and non-believers.

"I understand."

"Now go. Cicero must pay with his life. There is no other option."

Mari ran off to Cicero's room, intentionally avoiding the Night Mother's coffin. She hoped the creature wouldn't speak to her, especially about Maro. Mari's luck held as the Night Mother remained silent, and she found Cicero's journal.

The bound book was thick as she opened it, scrolling through the pages. Skimming the contents, she was amazed that Cicero wasn't the crazy loon he had always been. His early writings were thoughtful, lucid, intelligent. It wasn't until she got past a couple of years that his writing became erratic, demented. It was no wonder he became crazy being surrounded by death, betrayal, then silence other than his deranged thoughts, desperate to hear the Night Mother speak to him. Mari felt sorry for him. He was torn between his need to protect the Night Mother, to feeling resentment that she didn't speak to him despite his efforts. 

Mari checked on Veezara before she talked with Astrid. The Argonian seemed to be OK despite being in pain. He was well cared for, so she headed to speak to the leader. 

"You found something?"

"Yes, his journal indicates there is an old abandoned sanctuary in Dawnstar."

"Go then. Find Arnbjorn. Make sure my husband's all right, please. And then, send that jester's twisted little soul to the Void, in as many pieces as possible."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: The hunt for a lunatic.
> 
> I hope you come check out my latest story when you're done here :). [The Renegade](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26058193)


	12. How to Become a Traitor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mari goes on the hunt for Cicero. She is forced to continue her mission to assassinate the Emperor by masquerading as a famous chef, but she has other plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let us know what you think in the comments <3

The storm came out of nowhere, the snow pelting on her face, stinging. It felt more like ice than soft, billowy snow. Mari couldn't control her shivers, pulling her fur cloak tighter to her chest. Jumping off Frigga, she led him to the Dawnstar stables for some warmth and food. She rode her horse hard to get to the shipping town, and it still took three days and hoped that Arnbjorn was still alive, though she had to admit the bastard was resilient. The werewolf never cared for Mari, but the feeling was mutual. He was an insufferable prick, but he was family. 

According to old maps Astrid had, the Dawnstar Sanctuary was tucked away by the beach in a cave. Mari memorized the door's particular question, which was different from the Falkreath Sanctuary. Apparently, the old Sanctuary now stood empty, and she didn't know why. There wasn't time to delve into the Dark Brotherhood history. 

Once Mari reached the outskirts of town towards the ocean, she pulled on her hood and mask, her breath warming her face. She wished she could smell the salty air, but the storm was too strong. She could see a man leaning against something on the ground in the distance, and she ran to him. As she got closer, she knew it was Arnbjorn. It was so cold, and if injuries didn't kill him, the storm would. At least Nords like Arnbjorn and she could tolerate it longer than others. It was in their ancient blood.

"Arnbjorn! Are you OK?" Mari asked. She looked him over to see blood intermingled with snow, but he was still breathing.

"I should have figured Astrid would send you."

"Yeah, well… beggars can't be choosers."

Arnbjorn was an asshole, but at least he had it in him to chuckle. "I got to admit that little jester is good with that butter knife. But don't worry, I gave as good as I got."

"Where is the loon now?"

"In there! Through the door. Some old Sanctuary, by the looks of it. I would have followed him, but I don't know the phrase."

"Don't worry, I know it. I'm going after him. You head on home. Astrid is anxious about you." 

"All right, you convinced me. I doubt I'd be much good to you, anyway. The little fop cut me pretty deep, but I slashed him good. I'm pretty sure I severed an artery. Just follow the blood."

"Do you need some gold to rent a horse to return home?"

Arnbjorn shook his head and stood on shaky legs as she helped him up. "Listen, I know we haven't always… seen eye to eye—"

"You mean that you are always a complete dick to me?"

"Yeah, that… anyway, I just want to say thanks."

"You're family."

When Mari was sure he would make it out of there, she faced the old Sanctuary door, not unlike the one at home. As soon as she approached it, the door spoke.

" _What is life's greatest illusion_?"

"Innocence, my brother."

" _Welcome home._ "

Mari cringed when she learned the words to enter the Sanctuary. Innocence was not an illusion. Children were innocent; she was innocent when she lost her mother. Her mother was innocent. It was a phrase that took away the empathy of killing others who didn't deserve to die. When she finally started working for the Dark Brotherhood, she was eager to rid Skyrim of all the assholes. As time went on, she was too distracted by falling in love with Nazir. Now she felt surrounded by innocent blood. Yes, many deserved to die, but Mari started to question if she had a right to make those decisions. Who was she to say who lived and died? It left her in turmoil because the Dark Brotherhood was family and home. 

Pushing her doubts away, she focused on the task at hand, killing Cicero. Before Mari killed him, she needed to find out why Cicero went crazy and started slashing at everyone?

" _Listener! Is that you? Oh, I knew you'd come. Send the best to defeat the best. Astrid knew her stupid wolf couldn't slay sly Cicero._ " Cicero's voice seemed to come from nowhere, yet everywhere as it echoed through the old Sanctuary. She said nothing as she made her way through the cave, very similar to her own home.

Mari didn't bother with daggers. She needed her strong spells to deal with Cicero, not wanting to get close to him. She was well-trained in hand-to-hand combat thanks to Nazir's training, but Cicero was an expert. A fireball spell was ready in one hand and a sword in the other if she was forced into close combat. 

The spectral guardian startled her for a second when it attacked. Despite its ethereal form, it was solid as she was. She blasted it with fire and decapitated the stunned ghost. 

" _Oh, but this isn't at all what Mother would want. You kill the Keeper, or I kill the Listener? Now that's madness._ "

Mari moved on, wary, ready, watching, she came to a bridge. The trap was obvious. Stepping on the raised lever on the ground sent spears hurtling at anyone unfortunate enough to be standing on the bridge. When the spears retracted, she started to cross the platform but saw another guardian in the distance. It hadn't yet noticed her, pulling out her bow, she killed it from a distance.

" _Ouch! Pointy pointy! My home is well defended. I always have been a stickler for details. Get it? "Stick-ler." Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Oh, I slay me!_ "

_Good to know to expect more traps_. Mari would be ready.

The room she entered led down a flight of long circular stairs, heading deeper into the bowels of the Sanctuary. Mari peeked around a corner to see a large rotund room that has two guardians waiting for her. Nocking an arrow to her bow, she killed one, but the second guardian got wise and came at her. Pulling out her sword, she rushed the creature, washing it in flame. _At least they are easy to kill_.

"You're... still alive. Cicero respects the Listener's abilities, of course, but could you at least slow down a bit? I'm not what I used to be. Heh."

For the first time, Mari could hear uncertainty and worry in Cicero's voice. _Good_. The room led up to another flight of steps, following the blood trail: another room and more guardians. Mari cast a Frost Spider to assist her since there were three this time. Once they were dead, she moved on her spider close behind. She hoped she didn't have to keep fighting, wearing her down. 

The ice cave was a surprise. The assassin didn't realize the Sanctuary was so large. Her family could use a place like it and wondered if they would be willing to move. The ice tunnels gave way to a massive chamber. Cicero continued his taunts as Mari continued her pursuit.

" _Brrr! Chilly! You'll enjoy this. Not an original part of the Sanctuary, per se. Let's call it a "forced addition." Forced by what? Oh, come and see!_ " 

His confidence then gave way to more uncertainty, his emotions as erratic as his mind. " _All right, so Cicero attacked that harlot, Astrid! But what's a fool to do when his mother is slandered and mocked? Surely the Listener understands!_ "

The grunting was familiar— _Troll_. Mari blasted the creature several times with fireball spells, finally killing it and moved on. Cicero must have been bleeding profusely as there was blood everywhere.

The guardian assault continued as she delved deeper into the Sanctuary. Mari couldn't get over how massive it was. Once she got past the ice cave, the structure was man-made once more. With the help of the Frost Spider, she got past the guardians and kept following the blood. Her worries were coming true—she was getting tired. Being an assassin was one thing, killing one person, not fighting battle after battle with ghost-like creatures. 

" _Cicero admits, he thought the Listener would be dead by now. Heh. Maybe we could just forget all this? Hmm? Let bygones be bygones? What do you say? If it's any comfort, I do feel slightly bad about Veezara. Stupid lizard got in the way! But please tell me that hulking sheepdog has bled to death._ "

Standing in front of a door, Mari knew the jester was behind it. She steeled herself, ready for battle, her stomach fluttering with nerves, hoping she didn't have to fight hand-to-hand. 

" _And now we come to the end of our play. The grand finale._ "

Mari carefully opened the door to see Cicero, not ready for battle as she expected but curled in a pool of his own blood, trying to stem the flow of blood caused by Arnbjorn. 

"You caught me! I surrender! Ha ha ha ha," the jester said.

"I have to admit, I was expecting more of a fight."

"So confused, so confused... and they say I'm mad! If I'm a traitor, so are you! Have you not heard the maiden's voice? Are you not the Listener? So walk away! Let poor Cicero live! Tell Astrid you did the job! Stabbed, strangled, drowned poor Cicero! A tiny white lie for a dark assassin!"

"What do you mean I'm a traitor too?"

"You are the Listener! Astrid, the pretender, sees you as Cicero. The pretender hates you as she hates Cicero! I would kill her again, I would! Anything for Mother!"

"Are you saying that I am a threat to Astrid being the Listener?"

"Yes, yes... threat!"

Mari lowered her weapon, though a hand remained engulfed in flames. She had to think. Cicero was definitely crazy, but could it be true? Could Astrid see Mari as a threat to her leadership? Mari didn't want to be a leader. She couldn't help that the Night Mother spoke to her. Mari wasn't even a true believer. 

"Why would she see me as a threat?" she asked, but it was a rhetorical question. She knew the answer already. All her doubts about continuing on her path to killing, to Nazir wanting to eventually leave, cleared her mind. She knew then that she and Nazir would have to go. If Mari was a threat, then so was Nazir. 

"Yes, yes, you see it now!" Cicero said.

"I have to leave. Nazir has to leave."

"No! You must finish! Night Mother demands it!"

"Let me talk to Nazir… fuck! This is a disaster!" she yelled. Mari squatted down next to the crazy man, who tried to scootch away from her. 

"Hold still." Mari cast a healing spell on Cicero and looked at her in surprise. It was the first time she saw his eyes look almost lucid, grateful. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to stop the bleeding

"Oh, thank you, Listener! You are kind to poor, poor Cicero! I hate to leave Night Mother, but I cannot return yet. Take care of her."

Mari watched Cicero run from her. Standing, she headed out of the Sanctuary to return to Falkreath. She wasn't sure she could get away with lying to Astrid. The woman was shrewd. But Mari would cast a suggestive spell on the leader and show she was a staunch supporter of Astrid and killed Cicero if she needed to.

Three days later, Mari was back home to the Sanctuary. She had plenty of time to build her story and repeat it enough in her head to have it memorized. If Astrid still didn't believe her, she had her spells. Whether or not Astrid believed her, Mari was still going to remain on guard. It upset her that her leader felt Mari was a traitor if Cicero was to be believed, but she did believe him. Her entire family knew how Astrid felt about the Night Mother, not precisely being silent about her disdain. That also meant Mari would have to do her job with the Emperor perfectly, to prove to the woman she had nothing to worry about.

Astrid was at her table, her usual spot as she looked over scrolls and maps. The woman looked over, her face conveying nothing other than a flash of anger in her eyes. "Arnbjorn is safe, and for that, you have my thanks. But what of the fool? Is Cicero dead?"

"It was hard-fought, but yes, he is dead."

'You don't look like you had a hard time fighting him." 

_There is that mistrust_. "I didn't have to. Arnbjorn nearly killed him. Cicero was bleeding to death. It was nothing to kill him as he was lying there in a pool of his own blood."

"Excellent. Once again, you've proven yourself a born assassin. Now that this Cicero mess has been mopped up, we can get back to the matter at hand, hmm?"

Mari didn't believe for a second Astrid was being honest or trusting. Her only recourse was to do an excellent job with the Emperor. As Mari was walking off, Astrid called her back.

"There is still the matter of the Emperor."

"Yes, what is my next task?"

There's just one more target before we strike out at the Emperor. Have you, by chance, heard of the "Gourmet"? Read his cookbook? It's become quite a phenomenon. The Gourmet is scheduled to cook for the Emperor at a special dinner. You'll kill him, steal his Writ of Passage, and assume the role of a master chef. Festus has been spearheading this part of the assassination plan. He's close to uncovering the identity of the Gourmet. You should report to him."

Mari wanted to see Nazir, desperate to hold him and tell him everything, but Festus was not a patient old man. It would be better to speak with him, get instructions, then see Nazir.

"There you are. Took your sweet time dealing with Cicero, hmph? Now let's get down to business. Astrid told you about the Gourmet, I hope?"

She was used to Festus' barbs and ignored him, waiting for him to say what he needed. 

"Good! Anyone who's smart enough to shut up and listen can't be all bad. In my, um, investigations, I came upon this. It's a copy of the Gourmet's cookbook, but not just any copy. It's signed, you see! Seems to be a message from the Gourmet to one Anton Virane. I've tracked Virane to the keep in Markarth. It would seem he's the cook."

_Fucking Markarth_. "So this Anton should know who the Gourmet is?"

"I believe so. Therefore, you are to obtain that information from Virane—who the Gourmet really is, and where he can be found. Oh, and when you're done with Virane, kill him. Loose ends and all that. Next, you'll have to... Are you still paying attention?"

"No, I haven't listened to a word," Mari said. She could see the anger in his face turn to one of amusement, realizing she was joking.

"As I was saying. You'll need to kill the Gourmet, of course. But what's more, you'll need to get his Writ of Passage, so you can take his place. Oh, and if you can, hide his body. The longer it takes for anyone else to determine his real identity, the better. Now off with you!". 

"It will be done, Festus."

"Good now, go see Astrid, and she will give you the details on what to do after you kill the Gourmet."

After speaking with Astrid once more for further instructions, she opened the door to their room, seeing him sitting at a table reading as he did so frequently. His face lit up when he saw her standing there. Nazir had been so stoic, stiff for years that she knew him. Now that they were lovers and got past his nightmares, they were as close as a couple could get. He hid nothing from her. Nazir could be himself. 

"I know you were only gone a week, but I missed you," he said, lifting her up into his arms.

"I missed you too."

"I worried that Cicero killed you. I could barely sleep since you were gone. I'm happy you live."

"Doubted me, did you?"

"Never," he said. "Regardless, I couldn't help but worry. Tell me everything."

"The crazed jester lives," she whispered.

"What?"

"Yes, he is crazy, of that we already knew, but he was dying there on the floor, bleeding out from the injuries Arnbjorn gave him, so we had a little chat. He was angry with Astrid because she's not a true believer. Cicero explained that since I am the Listener, I am a threat to Astrid's power. He said because the Night Mother spoke to me, that I am a traitor in her eyes."

"And you believed him? Mari, he's crazy."

"I know he is, that doesn't mean he's a liar. I see it, understand it. Astrid is paranoid, and she's going to do whatever it takes to keep her control and power. I think—hope that if I do a good job on this mission that she will come around and believe that I'm on her side."

"OK, then let's make sure the Emperor dies."

"I had a lot to think about on my way home and I... after this, I want to be done. I want to have a life with you away from all this death."

"I am with you, no matter what, sweetheart. You know this." 

Mari pulled him down for a kiss. "I have to leave again in the morning. Let's make the rest of the night ours."

"You have all of me."

Their bodies sweaty, tangled in blankets and limbs, letting their hearts settle. Nazir held Mari close, brushing gentle fingers along her arm and shoulder. "This is it," he said.

"What is?"

"After you reach the palace as the Gourmet, you kill the Emperor. It will be over, and we can leave. I don't know what two assassins can do, but I'm sure we will figure things out together."

"Mercenaries sound like a good plan, but I'm not sure we can let others know who we really are. We don't want Astrid or anyone finding out where we are." Mari snuggled in tighter to him, inhaling his smell that she loved, fingers combing through the curls of his chest hair. 

"I'm not exactly a farmer," he chuckled.

"Definitely not. Neither am I."

"When this is over, I'm going to have to free Gaius. It will be on the way home anyway."

"Mari…"

"Hmm," she said, planting kisses along Nazir's face.

"Be careful... please. I may not see the things you do, but I'm worried, and I trust my gut. I don't know if it's because of what you just told me or our plans are changing, but we are treading dangerous waters."

"I know we are. I will be careful, I promise."

Nazir held Mari close to him as she snuggled in for the night, but sleep eluded him. Astrid's very idea would find Mari a threat to her leadership after all these years disturbed him. Ever since the arrival of the Night Mother, his family has been turned upside down. Veezara and Arnbjorn were almost killed, Cicero tried to kill Astrid. The dividing lines were drawn. Some of his family welcomed the Night Mother and the old ways, which only fueled Astrid's paranoia, while others remained on her side, as he did. Nazir was never part of the old ways, so he didn't care about them. One thing he knew for sure, if anything happened to Mari and it was at the hands of Astrid, he would kill his leader. He had been on the path of revenge before, but this time he wouldn't care who he killed if Mari died.

The plans were made early that morning with Nazir before she left for Markarth. This would be another attempt to gain information without killing the Jarl's chef. He was innocent, and there was no need to kill the man, especially with her powers, the only time she was ever grateful to be a part of Mephala, though she still loathed the Daedric Prince. Riding on Frigga, she couldn't help but turn her thoughts to the creature. Mephala had been quiet for years. Mari had not even thought about the Prince for a long time, but as she did, she wondered why Mephala had not intruded on her life, her dreams. 

The Daedric Prince was known to be meddlesome, so her silence didn't make sense, or perhaps Mari was doing precisely what Mephala wanted. The whole thought unnerved her, making her question what she was doing. The idea that the Night Mother could be Mephala didn't escape her, but even then, the Night Mother was relatively silent about Mari. She imagined her other mother to be more involved, if only for her amusement.

Mari hated Markarth after the Silver-Blood brothers, never able to forget the pain she suffered at their hands. Thongvor seemed so kind and tender until he started beating her, nearly raping her once he got what he wanted. The brothers got everything they deserved—death.

Mari disguised herself as a simple traveler, stabling Frigga for a quick bite and some water. She wouldn't be in Markarth long. Remembering where Understone Keep was, she walked straight there and into the kitchen. An old man was yelling at his apprentice for not working fast enough. The assassin knew that was Anton. She had to get him away from the young assistant so she could deal with the chef. Mari cast a spell on the young man, telling him he had to go to the bathroom.

"I have to go to the bathroom, Anton," the boy said.

"Bath… now hold on! I didn't say you could go. We have work to do!"

"I can't hold it any longer."

"Urgh, fine… hurry back!"

As soon as the young man left, Mari entered the kitchen. She had to be quick, not bothering to talk to the old man. Sneaking up behind him, she placed her hands on his head, eyes rolling back as the woman penetrated his mind. _Balagog gro-Nolob, an Orc, Nightgate Inn_

"Forget," she whispered as she let go of the chef's head and snuck out of the kitchen before he saw her.

"Where is that kid!" She could hear Anton shout.

"Now to Nightgate Inn then Solitude," she muttered.

Already, Mari was gone three days to get to Markarth, and it would take another three to get to the inn in the Pale. The place was in the middle of nowhere, between Dawnstar and Windhelm. She supposed if one was to be a secret chef, then the middle of nowhere would be ideal. 

Mari's plan was as simple as the one for Anton. She would just take the Writ of Passage and make the Orc forget about his invitation and that she was ever there. 

Nightgate Inn was a dreary little place surrounded by mountains and snow. Mari didn't know how they made any gold, but she assumed it would be an excellent place to stop between travels on the road. Her plan was to rest first. After traveling nearly a week with barely any rest, she was exhausted. Mari needed to be clear-headed to cast her spell on the Orc properly. 

To her surprise, the Gourmet apparently cooked at the inn, so the food was to die for. The soup was so delicious, she ordered another bowl with fresh bread. Yes, she made the right decision to not kill the Gourmet. His death would have been a waste, and Skyrim would have been the lesser for it.

That night, with a belly full of good food, Mari slept soundly. In the morning, she couldn't resist ordering breakfast. She couldn't remember when she had such good food. It wasn't cheap, but she had the gold.

The only ones in the Inn were Mari and the innkeeper. When the innkeeper was distracted, she snuck down to the cellar where the Gourmet had a room. She watched the Orc head downstairs after he was finished cooking breakfast. With his back turned to her, she didn't bother speaking with him before casting her paralytic spell. Searching his pockets, the woman found the Writ of Passage, shoving it in her bag. Grabbing his head, she told him to forget and snuck out of there.

_Another three days to get to Solitude_. Mari was well-fed and well-rested, but her heart ached for Nazir, not used to being gone so long, not since the Markarth incident. It was almost over. Another week at least then, she could release Gaius and head home and into Nazir's strong arms. After they had their whole lives to look forward to. 

Thoughts soon turned to Soren. Since the week she stayed with her mother's husband and helped her deal with Nazir's past, they had secretly written to each other. It was how she could get him to agree to set free Gaius, no questions asked. He also promised her and Nazir a place to stay should they ever need to get away. Soren didn't know what she did for a living, so the offer was one of innocence, like getting away for a vacation. Mari was seriously thinking about taking the man up on his offer. It would be an excellent place to hide from the Dark Brotherhood for a while when she and Nazir left.

As she headed to Solitude, she decided to take a detour and headed past Morthal to the little house in the middle of nowhere. She did the special knock, relieved to see Gaius standing there. He looked handsome in his new beard. "Is it done then?"

"Almost. I just wanted to check on you. I know we left you supplies, but anything could happen, and it was on my way. Can I come in?"

"Sure, sure," Gaius said, stepping aside. "Can I get you anything?"

"No, I'm fine, thank you. The beard suits you."

"Uhm, thanks. So, do... do you know how my father handled everything?"

"Do you really want to know?"

Gaius shook his head, "I suppose not. I guess I can very well imagine."

"You will be home to him soon, I promise."

After an awkward moment of silence, Mari asked if she could change into her disguise there. 

"Sure, I will step out for a moment," the man said.

Mari changed into her Chef's outfit, deciding to just ride in as the Gourmet. She crossed her fingers the information was correct, and no one knew the Gourmet was a male or an Orc. When she was finished, she thanked Gaius and rode off towards Solitude and Castle Dour.

Mari double-checked she had everything she needed—Writ of Passage, Jarrin Root for poisoning, a hidden dagger. Confident she was ready, Mari walked to Castle Dour to show she was the Gourmet, who was expected. The Emperor asked for the Gourmet to prepare the evening meal. Mari made sure to study the Gourmet's recipes to fool anyone who forced her to cook in front of them.

The assassin gave herself a pat on the back for not reacting when she was face to face with Commander Maro. The whole point of 'killing off' his son was to leave the man bereft, but there he was, stone-faced and still working. It was something she hadn't prepared for, and Mari hoped it wouldn't be a problem. 

"Stop right there. The tower is off-limits until further notice," Maro said.

Mari handed the Writ to the man. "I am the Gourmet," she said with hands on her hips. "Let me through! I have come a long way and deserve to be treated with a little more respect!"

"I... I'm sorry! I didn't realize! We had no idea who to expect, you understand. Please, don't let me keep you. Proceed to the kitchens straight away. Gianna, the castle chef, has been eagerly awaiting your arrival. Gianna will be overjoyed to meet you. She's in the kitchens."

With a curt nod, Mari walked inside the castle and wound her way into the kitchens. When the assassin walked in, she saw an Imperial woman busy cooking and issuing orders to her assistants. "Not another delivery. I told you people, our stocks are fine. Now put whatever you have over there, then get out!" Gianna yelled, not realizing that Mari was dressed as a chef.

"I am the Gourmet," Mari said, showing a feigned irritation at not being recognized or treated respectfully.

The... Gourmet? Oh! Finally! When I heard the Gourmet was being brought in to cook for the Emperor, I could hardly believe it. It's just..."

"Just what? Out with it, woman!"

"You're a Nord! I never would have guessed it! But where in the world did you learn to cook like that? Here in Skyrim? Or maybe somewhere less..."

"Enough! The Gourmet is here to cook, not talk! Let us begin."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next: Betrayals upon betrayals.


	13. Traitors Betraying Traitors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything goes to hell when the Emperor turned out to be a decoy and Mari was betrayed by her own family. Her only thoughts, as she rushed home to the Sanctuary, was to save Nazir from the Penitus Oculatus. Mari is about done with Mephala's meddling when she discovers the real purpose behind her birth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is relatively canon, on the rocks with a twist.

Gianna was properly in deference to the Gourmet. “Yes, I am so honored to be cooking with the great Gourmet! The Emperor has requested your signature dish—the Potage le Magnifique.”

Mari mentally scrolled through the list of recipes she memorized in her head and visualized the list of ingredients. “Yes, yes… very well. Good choice.”

“I've taken the liberty of getting it started. But the cookbook only says so much, and everyone makes the Potage differently. I would be honored if we could make it... the Gourmet's special way. The base broth is already boiled. We can get started right now. Which ingredient should I add next?"

“Carrots and a splash of mead.”

"Carrots? Really? Okay... What next?"

“What is wrong with vegetables, my dear? Next, some Vampire Dust.” Mari nearly gagged at the thought, but it was in her copy of the cookbook. She said it with such confidence to leave no room for doubt.

“Vampire dust? Seriously? Yes, I guess I can see how that would add a more... earthy texture. Oddly enough, we do have some on hand. All right. What next, then?" Gianna asked, pulling down a vial with the dust sprinkling it in the soup.

“Next Horker Meat.”

“Yum, Horker. So delicious. I swear, is there a soul alive who doesn't enjoy the taste of... Sorry, I didn't mean to get carried away. There we go, one cup of diced horker meat. I have to say, the stew seems done. Add anything else, and we may dilute the distinct flavors. So... is that it?"

“No, there is one final ingredient. Here, add this,” Mari ordered, handing the woman a vial.

“Are you sure? The Potage tastes perfect already.”

“Are you the Gourmet or am I?” Mari demanded adding enough flair so the woman didn’t question.

“Apologies. Of course. It's your most famous recipe, after all. All right then, your secret ingredient is added. And if I may say so... it has been an honor, getting a chance to prepare a meal with, well... the best chef in the entire Empire. I'll carry the stew pot, and lead the way up to the dining room. I'm sure the Emperor and his guests are dying to meet you.”

“Very well. I will follow.”

Mari, followed the woman carrying the soup through the castle until they reached a large dining room. Nervous flutters hit her stomach when she saw the Emperor sitting at the head of the table. It was almost over. She and Gianna had to stand and wait until the Emperor waved them to serve. He was a large balding man in fine robes and fingers glittering in jeweled rings. People like him pissed her off, flaunting their wealth while their people starved and struggled to survive. These rich people got their wealth off the backs of those who have nothing else to give yet they continued to take—parasites. It was a good enough reason for Mari to kill the man despite the politics.

"But aren't you the least bit nervous? After everything that's happened?" asked one of the noblewomen.

"You mean the wedding? My cousin's apparent murder? An unfortunate misunderstanding, no more. Cold mead, hot tempers... these things happen."

The woman persisted. "Quite. Yet that recent business with the young officer. Maro, was it? How dreadful. The son of your commander, plotting your assassination."

“Yes, an unfortunate turn of events, that. But an isolated incident. I have been assured the fault was with the man's son alone. Truth is, we are in no danger whatsoever. Killing an Emperor can be useful, but befriending one? Now that's beneficial—as I'm sure you'd all agree."

The Emperor looked up and beckoned Gianna to serve, a look of pure delight on his face. "Aha! Here we are. Honored guests, I present to you—the Gourmet! Ah, the Potage le Magnifique. So delicious. My friends, as emperor, I of course reserve the right of the first taste."

Mari bowed to the nobles at the table, not saying anything, then made her way to the door leading out of the castle as instructed. Astrid made arrangements that her escape would be unobstructed. Standing close to the door, she stood and waited for the Emperor to eat his meal and ensure he died before she left. 

The poison took effect quickly as she knew it would. 

"Oh... Oh, how marvelous. Just delicious. It is everything I had hoped it would be. It... I... I think something's... wrong... I... Hunh..." the Emperor sputtered and fell face down on the table, everyone gasped in shock, not quite registering what happened.

It was the Penitus Oculatus guard that was the first to react. "By the Gods! The Gourmet and the chef have poisoned the Emperor! Get them!"

Mari could hear the chef protesting that she was innocent as Mari smashed a bottle on the ground and escaped in a cloud of dust. It was a special concoction Astrid made for her to mask her escape. Running out the door, she melted the handle and lock so no one could reach her. Turning around to run across the bridge to the tower she suddenly stopped in her tracks seeing Commander Maro and several armed guards blocking her way. 

“Fuck…” Astrid was supposed to have the way clear for her and now her mind rushed with thoughts on how to get out the situation she was in. Looking down, she knew she couldn’t just jump. She was too high up. Her only choice was to fight her way through, but if she did she would have to fight all the Guards of Solitude. 

Mari didn’t understand how Commander Maro could have known who she was or figured out so fast that she just assassinated the Emperor without someone informing him. She knew right then someone betrayed her as her mind ticked off a list of names. 

"That man was, by far, the most insufferable decoy the Emperor has ever employed. I'm glad he's dead. Ah, but I'm even happier that you killed him. You, an assassin for the Dark Brotherhood, have just made an attempt on the Emperor's life and would have succeeded, had it been the real man. Surprised? So was I, when a member of your ‘Family’ came to me with the plan. We worked out a deal, you see. An exchange. I get you, and the Dark Brotherhood gets to continue its existence. But you know what? I've changed my mind. How about this? I kill you, and butcher each and every one of your miserable friends? Your Sanctuary's being put to the sword right now. That's what I think of this ‘deal.’ You killed my son! All of you! And now you'll pay the price.”

Dread filled her knowing her own family betrayed her. How could they? Then worry filled her about Nazir. Fuck her family if Maro wanted to kill them she was so sick with worry and anger. But Nazir… no.

“Kill her and make sure her body is never found,” he ordered.

“Wait…” Mari didn’t get a chance to explain his son was alive before she was knocked out from behind as darkness crept into her vision.

It was blurry and dark as her eyes blinked into focus. She could smell wetness, mold, and death. Lifting her head, she could see the bars in front of her knowing she was in a dungeon cell. Once again, she was captured and Mari had a sudden flood of panic, remembering the last time with the drugs, beatings, and near-rape. 

She tried to move, but her arms pulled taut with chains, her head throbbing from the hit. Looking down, her body was completely naked and she couldn’t move off the wall she was manacled to. There was only one reason she was exposed and unable to move in her cell. They planned to torture her. The only difference between this time and the last was there was no collar to inhibit her magic. They didn’t know she had magic, otherwise, they would have been more careful.

“Ah, you are awake finally. I was beginning to wonder if they hit your head too hard. It’s no fun torturing you if you aren’t awake to enjoy it,” said one of her jailers. 

“I wouldn’t want to miss that,” she quipped.

_Wait for it_. The man unlocked the cell and entered, a smirk on his face. He clearly enjoyed hurting others. Mari’s eyes rolled back into her head and she reached into his mind. 

“ _You want to let me go. I have done nothing wrong and you don’t want to hurt me. Unlock my chains and remove your armor._ ”

“I want to let you go. You’ve done nothing wrong,” he repeated. The guard walked close to Mari, his eyes unfocused under her spell, and unlocked her manacles. She dropped to the ground with a wave of dizziness. She was going to have to heal that concussion first. The wave of warmth in her head was blissful as she healed herself, her weak restoration magic was just enough.

When she finished, she turned to her jailer and saw his removed armor on the ground. Lifting it up, it was a bit large for her, but it would do. It would be easier to escape if she looked like the other guards. Donning the armor, she ordered the man to lean against the wall. When he did, she locked him in the chains then knocked him out. She didn’t want him calling out as soon as the spell wore off.

_I’ve got to get to Nazir._ Mari tried not to worry and panic. Her main focus had to be escaping, then she could worry for him. 

With the jailer’s helm on, she slipped out quickly from the dungeon. There were guards everywhere, but they barely took notice of her. Mari struggled to control the urge to run. It was nearly instinctual, that fight or flight, and she was in flight mode. But she used her training to steady her breathing and heart rate. She didn’t run, but she didn’t walk slowly either. She burst out into the evening, grateful it was dark outside.

“Goodnight,” said one of the men standing on duty.

“Night…” she muttered and kept on walking. 

_Down the steps, keep walking_. The guards didn’t take notice of her, but she wasn’t in the clear yet. Solitude was virtually a fortress and the headquarters for the Imperial Army. Guards and soldiers were everywhere. _Keep moving_. She passed the market, shops, and tavern. _Nearly there. Just get to the gate_. Mari reached for the gate to open—

“Halt!”

_Shit_. Mari’s heart picked up speed, trying to calm herself.

“What are you doing, soldier?”

“I...I…”

“You know better. We open the gate, not you. It’s our duty.”

“Right. Sorry. It’s been a long day, you know, after what happened.”

“I know! Can you believe someone tried to assassinate the Emperor? Good thing he was a decoy. I cannot imagine if that assassin was successful. Good thing they caught her. They will teach the Dark Brotherhood not to mess with the Empire.”

_Shut up!_ “Indeed. Good riddance to her. I just wish I was there to torture her myself,” she laughed.

“You and me both, sister. Well, you have a good night.”

“Goodnight.”

Mari’s whole body and mind were telling her to run, but she didn’t. She walked down the dark path, following the torches through another gate and out towards the stables. It was the first time she thought about Frigga and she prayed that the Penitus Oculatus didn’t kill him, that they didn’t know how she got to town.

Everyone at the stables was inside their home, hopefully asleep. Mari snuck into the stables, kissing her horse's nose, happy to see him still alive. Digging into her pack, she pulled out her armor and threw it on, tossing the guard’s armor aside. It wouldn’t matter if someone found it. She would be long gone. Jumping on Frigga, she burst into the night and pushed him as fast as he would go back to the Sanctuary. All thoughts now on Nazir, trying not to think about him dying. One stop first.

Mari tried not to pound on the door. He would never open it if she did. Calming herself, she did the special knock and Gaius was quick to open it, still awake. She brushed past the man and paced back and forth.

“I have been betrayed and the Emperor lives. My own family betrayed me and your father nearly killed me for your death. He didn’t even give me a chance to tell him you live. His soldiers are on their way to kill my family. You know what? Fuck my family. But I have to get my lover. You are free to go,” she rambled and left.

“Wait…”

“Go home. Tell your father you live. Tell him who saved you and perhaps he won’t hunt me the rest of his life.”

“I will.”

“I have to go.” Mari jumped on Frigga and rushed out into the night. 

Mari made it into Falkreath in record time. Her poor horse was exhausted, she was exhausted, as she quickly jumped off and ran to the Sanctuary. Panic flooded her as flames were pouring out of the door, guards standing outside congratulating each other. Mari had not felt such fear since the death of her mother but combined with a sort of rage at the soldiers, rage at her family who backstabbed her. Her only thought was to get to Nazir.

Screaming she cast a spell she hadn’t used since her mother died, the two guards dropped dead, bleeding internally. Running in, the heat nearly scorched her, coughing, she searched for her lover. “Nazir!” she yelled.

More guards as she killed them with a swipe of her hands, using her rage to pull out her brutal magic and keep her moving. 

“ _He is dying_ ,” said the familiar voice.

“Fuck you, he’s not!”

“ _I can save him._ ”

“I will save him, you fucking bitch, bastard... whatever you are!”

Despite her bravado, the words scared her, worried she would reach him too late. Mari passed bodies, some were her family, others were soldiers. _Veezara, Arnbjorn_. “Die,” she screamed, casting another spell that burned the guards from the inside out. The fire was getting out of control and she couldn’t find Nazir.

“Nazir!”

More soldiers must have heard her yelling as they came running out of rooms, swords drawn, but they were no match for her fear and rage. A telekinesis spell she had yet to master until then unleashed within her as she grabbed the men and flung them into the raging fire, ignoring their screams of pain as they were burned alive.

“ _He’s dying_.”

“He’s NOT dying! Not if I can help it”

“ _Why won’t you let me help you, my daughter?_ ”

“I hate you!”

Cicero’s room, Nazir on his back, unmoving. Babette, crying and trying to help him, but she couldn’t get to her potions. Mari ran and slid to her knees seeing her beloved looking dead. “Does he live, Babette? Does he live?”

“He lives… barely.”

“They came in…”

“I know what happened. Not now. I have to help him.”

His face was covered in soot, blood all over his armor, his sword flung to a corner. There were dead soldiers everywhere and she knew he killed them. Mari tried not to cry at his still body, casting a healing spell on him, but he wasn’t moving still.

“He has a lot of deep wounds and inhaled a lot of smoke from the fire,” Babette whimpered.

“ _I can save him._ ” 

“I will save him!”

“ _He’s dead_.”

“He’s not dead!” Mari screamed, ignoring the truth as she couldn’t feel a pulse.

“ _You cannot save him, child. Only I can do that._ ”

“This is all your fault!”

“Who... who are you yelling at?” the Vampire child asked.

“Fucking Mephala.”

Mari cast her healing spells, but she never mastered restoration. She only could heal enough to fix small wounds, not bring anyone back to life. Some of his cuts healed, but he was still dead. 

“ _Let me help you_.”

Mari sobbed on her lover, head to his bleeding chest. She hadn’t felt this helpless since that day her mother was murdered, seeing her body lying there in the rain, no one caring. _I can’t live without him_. Mari felt like she was drowning in her own sorrow as the flames were encroaching on the assassins. 

“ _I can save him_.”

“At what cost?!” she yelled towards the ceiling. Her sorrow, rage, pain culminated in a sort of desperation—blinded by it. Mari stood, opened the coffin, and ripped the Night Mother out of it. Her leathery skin and permanent toothy smile, her lips weathered away a long time ago, made Mari disgusted. Mari carried the skin and bones of the Night Mother and threw the corpse onto the fire, and fell to her knees weeping.

Mari crawled over to Nazir, sat, and pulled him to her chest, holding him. She was going to die with him. “Babette, get to safety.”

“Come with me,” the girl pleaded.

“No.”

Babette didn’t argue and ran out of the Sanctuary.

Mari buried her face into Nazir’s neck and sobbed. Trying once more to cure him, save him, bring him back to life. She pulled the Magicka into her, pulled forth all her knowledge, all her pain, all her suffering, all her happiness, and love, letting it spill out of her. Her entire body glowed as the magic swirled around her and engulfed her lover. When she felt she was running dry, she pushed out more power, grasping for any reserves and kept casting her spell even when darkness was filling her mind. She was dizzy with it, desperate, seeing spots in her eyes. She didn’t care if the spell killed her as long as he lived. 

The fire was closer, the smoke searing her lungs. The smoke Nazir inhaled started pulling out of him like a black cloud. As Mari pushed for more Magicka, her vision darkened, falling into nothingness.

The light poured into her eyes was ethereal with beautiful rays pushing through the tops of trees. Her vision was blurry and wondered if she was dead. If this was the Void, then it was beautiful, always believing it to be pure blackness, nothingness. Blinking her eyes to clear, there was a figure hovering over her, blocking the light from her vision, unable to see who it was.

As her mind cleared, she started to remember the horror show she came home to. The fire, soldiers, dead family... Nazir. The tears welled up as grief filled her. She tried to sob, but her lungs were on fire, coughing. Her skin hurt from the fire. If she were dead, Mari was certain she wouldn’t feel any pain, or would she?

“Shhh, you’re OK now,” said the person whispering.

“It’s not OK,” she wept, her voice hoarse from the burn to her throat. “He’s dead, he’s dead! I want to die… let me die!”

Mari felt someone lift her up, her vision still a blur as she looked around. Strong arms holding her, kissing her face, her tears as she struggled. “Shhh. I’m here. I’m OK,” he said.

It couldn’t be true. He was dead and she tried to save him. Is he alive? Did it work? Mari must have asked the question out loud since the male voice answered—Nazir’s voice.

“I am alive, sweetheart. Babette said you saved me.”

“Drink this,” said a child. Mari felt a warmth spread through her body, suddenly wracked with coughing, her body trying to expel all the smoke she inhaled. When she was done, her head rested on a thick chest, crying once more. The tears were in part from the relief of not being in pain to hearing Nazir’s voice, the feel of his lips kissing her head.

“Shhh, you’re OK now,” he said, holding her tightly to him.

Mari sat up, turning to face him. His beautiful face came into view, his dark skin covered in blood and soot, but he was alive. She could see it for herself. She saved him without Mephala’s help. “I thought you died. I wanted to die.”

“I know.”

She grabbed him around his neck, her face planted to his skin, smelling of smoke and blood, but she didn’t care. He was alive. Crying once more for the fortune they lived. “I love you so much, Nazir. I don’t know what I would have done without you.”

“I love you too. I am glad you didn’t die trying to save me, but you nearly did.”

“Did Babette make it out OK?”

“I’m right here. I just gave you the potion.”

Mari turned to see the Vampire child and pulled the girl in for an embrace. “I’m glad you live!”

“What happened,” Babette asked. “How did all this happen?”

“We were betrayed by one of our own. As soon as I killed the Emperor, which was a decoy, I was caught. Commander Maro was there and explained to me he had an arrangement with one of the Dark Brotherhood. My death in exchange for his son’s. He then told me he was going to kill all of the Dark Brotherhood. I never got the chance to tell him his son lived. 

I managed to escape before the torture began, let Gaius go, and rode Frigga as fast as he would go to get home to you. Who betrayed us, Nazir? Do you know?”

“I don’t,” he said. Mari could hear the firmness of his voice, the anger.

“I guess it doesn’t matter now. Is everyone else dead?”

“Let’s go check,” Babette said.

Nazir helped Mari up to stand. She was still a bit dizzy, but she felt better. They walked into the ruin to check for survivors and any supplies they would need. The Sanctuary was destroyed and there was no coming back to it. She grabbed Babette, wanting to talk to her first.

“You should know that Nazir and I are done with the Dark Brotherhood. It was our plan before all this happened, but now that everyone is gone, I, at least, have no plans of reestablishing it. I hope you are OK with that.”

“I don’t care. It’s over. I’ve been a part of the Dark Brotherhood for centuries. It is all I have known, but there is nothing left to return to anyway.”

“You can come with us,” Mari suggested. “We will work as Mercenaries, probably. Start new lives. But you are welcome to stay with us.”

“Thank you, Mari. I will think about it.”

After searching, they could find no survivors. Looking into the last room, on the floor was another body lying sprawled on the ground, burned head to toe. The hair that remained was that of Astrid. Bending down, Mari inspected the body only to fall on her ass in fear when the body started breathing.

“Astrid! Are you OK?” Mari asked.

"Alive... You're alive... Thank Sithis…,” she said, voice hoarse and struggling to speak.

“Let me see if I can heal you.”

“Shhh... Please. There is much... I have to say... not much time... I'm sorry. So very sorry. The Penitus Oculatus... Maro... He said that by giving you to them, he would leave the Dark Brotherhood alone. Forever. By Sithis, I was such a fool. All of this... it's all my fault. You are the best of us, and I nearly killed you... as I've killed everyone else..."

“You are the betrayer,” Mari sighed. She knew deep down it could have been Astrid since the woman was so threatened by her loss of power, resenting the fact that Mari was the Listener. But Mari was not the Listener. It was just another one of Mephala’s games. “You will be judged by Sithis. Your paranoid delusions caused all this. I pity you.”

“No! Don't pity me. I deserve whatever fate the Dread Lord has in store. I betrayed you... and now Maro has betrayed me. Fitting... I just wanted things... to stay the way they were. Before Cicero, before the Night Mother. Before... you. I thought I could save us. I was wrong. But you're alive! So there's still a chance. A chance to start over, rebuild. That's why I did... this. Don't you see? I prayed to the Night Mother! I am the Black Sacrament."

“You were played by Mephala. I have burned the Night Mother. Your greed for power is what did you in and caused all this death and destruction. You played right into the Daedric Prince’s hands.”

“Yes, yes… I was stupid. You lead this Family now. I give you the Blade of Woe so that you can see it through. You must kill... Me."

“I’m not leading anything. The Dark Brotherhood is no more, but I will kill you and put you out of your misery.” Mari grabbed the dagger and slit Astrid’s throat, watching her die.

"If I hadn't heard it with my own ears, I wouldn't have believed it. How could Astrid have done this to us? Strangely, I feel only pity for her..." Babette said.

Mari could feel strong, yet comforting arms lift her up and hold her. She nuzzled into Nazir, feeling like crying again, but she held back the tears. "Astrid... By the sands, I still can't wrap my head around it...," he said. “Come on, love. Let’s get out of here.”

Mari walked through the darkness covered in webs and spider sacs. She was there once before in her dreams as a child. This time, Mari was unafraid. This time, Mari was angry. Mephala and her meddling ways destroyed lives once again, this time it was almost Nazir who had died and Mari was never going to forgive the Daedric Prince.

“Come out Mephala. Quit cowering behind your fucking webs. Face me!”

“My little itsy bitsy spider. I am glad to see you live,” Mephala said, slinking out from behind a web, her black-winged spider legs protruding out of her back, just as Mari remembered her.

“Fuck you!”

“Such human, barbaric language. You are better than that.”

“Fuck you!” Mari spat again.

Mephala ignored Mari’s baiting. “I knew you were strong. You just needed a chance to find it within yourself. I’m glad to know I didn’t create a weakling. You are powerful, child.”

“You almost killed Nazir in your meddling! I will never forgive you for that!”

“Yet, you saved him,” the creature said, waving an indifferent hand.

“And it nearly killed me. Was all that necessary? Did you really have to destroy the Dark Brotherhood, killing most everyone? You almost killed me as well… your own child.”

Mephala slithered closer to Mari, her spider legs touching her flesh, making her skin crawl. “I wouldn’t have let you die. The Dark Brotherhood got what they deserved.”

“Is that why you had me? Did you plan all of this? Killed my mother so I would be taken into the Dark Brotherhood in my pain, to eventually become ‘the Listener,’ to Astrid’s betrayal? That was your plan. Is that what my purpose was all along?”

“You are such a smart child. Yes, that was my plan. That was why you were created. Years I have envisioned the destruction of the Dark Brotherhood for destroying my beloved Morag Tong. It was nothing to plant the seed of paranoia in your stupid leader, Astrid, was it?

“I gave you life. I gave you Nazir. Be happy with what you have, my little spider.”

“Fuck you. I will never forgive you for this. You killed my mother! I loved her! You nearly killed Nazir! So excuse me for not feeling overly generous with gratitude.”

While Mephala knew Mari’s powers grew after saving Nazir, what the creature didn’t know was by how much. Perhaps she did know but didn’t believe Mari would turn that power on her. Mari’s eyes rolled up into her head, arms spread, feeling the Magicka spread through her body. The webs that decorated Mephala’s domain turned against her as they wrapped the Prince in a tight cocoon as she did to Mari as a child. Spiders of all shapes and sizes came out from behind dark corners, egg sacks, from the ceiling, surrounding Mephala. 

“Wha… what are you doing?” Mephala asked with an unusual tremble of fear could be heard in her voice.

Mari stood face to face with the Daedric Prince, eyes filled with anger and triumph. “I know I can’t kill you, but I can make you suffer. I have you inside me—your powers. I have reached my full potential. Perhaps I should thank you for giving such power to harm you. You have no power over me any longer. Any meddling in my life, Nazir’s life, Babette’s life, or Soren’s life will result in swift retribution and pain. You will leave us alone for the rest of our lives. You got what you wanted—no more Dark Brotherhood. Is that understood?”

“Now, now, my dear…”

“Is that understood?” Mari asked with gritted teeth.

Mephala didn’t bother hiding her rage. “You ungrateful little shit!”

“You got what you wanted. Leave me and my family alone. I will ask you once more... Is that understood?”

The smile that spread across Mephala’s face was unexpected, manipulative. “Of course, my little spider. I would never harm you or your family. I will leave you alone.”

Mari woke up with a start, grasping her pounding heart. “Hey, it’s OK. Bad dream?” Nazir asked, pulling Mari back down in the bed.

“Yes, everything is fine now,” she smiled and kissed his sleepy lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Next: Epilogue


	14. Families Renewed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here we come to the end of our story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We hope you enjoyed Tangled Web and Mephala's daughter. Thank you so much for reading <3

All the rain did was dampen his mood, literally and figuratively, as he sat on the porch step, drinking straight from a brandy bottle. He didn't care how drunk he got. It was his day off anyway. Commander Maro could have gone to the inn, but Fraida was there, a constant reminder of all that he lost. Killing the Dark Brotherhood was exhilarating at the time, but once it was done, there weren't enough assassins to kill to calm his broken heart, losing his only son. There was one more assassin he needed to kill, but not today—not today. Get drunk first.

Maro couldn't figure out how the woman escaped while shackled, but the jailer guarding her was severely punished. He would make sure to train them better, so they don't fall for a pretty face. Fucking idiot.

Looking down the road through the rain, the drops blurring his vision until he blinked them away, he saw someone approaching the town. Maro wondered who would be traveling on a day like today in the pouring rain. Sure he was sitting in it, but he didn't care. He lost his only son—his only child. The man nearly quit his job that day, but something pushed him. He knew the Dark Brotherhood was behind his son's death and planting evidence as if Gaius would betray the Empire. His son would never do such a thing. He thanked Gods the Emperor knew that too or else Maro wouldn't have been able to go ahead with his plans to destroy the assassin guild. The Dark Brotherhood overplayed their hand after killing Vittoria Vici.

As the man walked into town, the closer he got, the more familiar he looked. There was something about the way he moved—his gait. Maro stood up and dropped his bottle of brandy as it spilled into the soil, uncaring. His heart felt explosive in his chest, his eyes welling up with tears. Maro wasn't usually a sentimental man of feelings or emotions. There were only two times in his adult life that he cried—his wife's death and the death of his son. But was his son dead? The man walking towards him—so close—looked like him, but his son never wore a beard. No, he's a ghost. He had to be. His son was dead. Ghosts don't smile. Ghosts don't cry. 

"Ssson?" Maro managed to sputter out.

"Hello, Father," Gaius said.

"You... you're dead."

Gaius didn't say anything as he walked up to his father and pulled the drunken man into a tight embrace. Maro's slow brain from the brandy churned until he recognized he was being held by a very much alive Gaius. Wrapping his arms around him, Maro wept for the third time in his adult life. 

He wanted to be angry with the assassin for putting his father through so much pain; instead, Gaius was appreciative that she chose to let him live and was able to return home. 

"I live, Father. It's OK. Come on inside, and I will tell you everything."

Maro allowed himself to be led by his ghost of a son. No, not a ghost. Gaius lives. Both men were dripping wet from the storm as the young man dug around for towels. He dried himself off then dried his father, who stood then dumbly still trying to process that his son was standing in front of him. Gaius then heated some water and poured them both some tea. 

The young man brought them steaming mugs to the table, forced his father to sit, and then stoked the fire before he sat down. 

"How? How is it you live? I… I am trying to figure it out."

"An assassin from the Dark Brotherhood saved me, Father."

The anger rose in the older man, shaking his head, denying what his son was telling him. The Dark Brotherhood was all evil. There was no way they would have saved his son. He couldn't believe it in his rage. But was his rage justified seeing his son sit in front of him?

"I see your face doesn't believe, but it is the truth. A young woman, nearly my age, came to me and told me everything. She said she was very much against killing an innocent, despite her orders. The woman knew the Dark Brotherhood would kill her and her lover, who helped keep me alive."

"I don't understand," Maro said, still not grasping what his son was telling him. Perhaps he did have too much to drink. He ran a hand through his wet hair in his confusion.

"Her assignment was to kill the Emperor. You know this. She had to do her job, but she didn't want to do it at the expense of innocent lives. She told me her entire plan and ordered me to tell you everything. The woman wanted you to know. The man and woman, married or something, found me a small house to stay in. They said you had to believe I was dead for it to work, or other assassins would have killed me. I was against the whole idea, not wanting to hurt you, but the alternative was either death or… well, she said she had her ways to force me.

They set me up in this house fully stocked with everything I needed until they let me go, and I could come home to you. Right after the Emperor was assassinated… well, she said it was a trap. She got away, but she's not angry you captured her, but she let me go, telling me it was time to go home. The woman ran off, saying her family was in danger. Did… did you do something to them, father?"

Maro still had the tears for his son, but he couldn't feel guilty about killing assassins, even if his son lived. They were a scourge that had to be eradicated. "Y… yes. I made a deal with the Dark Brotherhood leader to capture and kill the assassin, the woman you speak of, your apparent killer. In return, I was to leave the Guild alone, but how could I? How could I move on from the fact that they killed you and tried to turn you into a traitor? No. They couldn't live, so I killed them all." 

"I hope you didn't kill her lover at least—her husband, or whatever he was. At least she lives," Gaius said, holding his father's hand.

"I don't care! She's an assassin and needs to die! She still attempted to kill the Emperor, and now that she knows she killed the decoy, she will go after him again!" Maro said with a burst of renewed anger.

"She saved my life, Father. I am here because of her."

"But… my job is to…"

"Yes, your job is to save the Emperor, keep him protected. She won't kill him. I know it."

"Is that what she said?"

"No, but I know after everything that happened to her and what she did for me, I believe this."

"I am so happy you are alive, Son. My heart is renewed, but I have a job to do. I cannot let her get close to him, kill him. I'm sorry, Son."

Gaius nodded in understanding. He knew that once his father made up his mind, there was no changing it.

The days had passed, and Maro's heart lifted higher and higher with his son close to him. Gaius asked Fraida to marry him, and she said yes. It was a happy time as they celebrated. Soon Maro would have to return to work now that his grieving was over. He couldn't let the assassin kill the Emperor and would head straight away to Solitude, where his ship was docked to prepare for an attack.

Maro didn't know what time it was, but no light came in through the windows. It wasn't yet dawn, but it felt close. Feeling thirsty, he rubbed his eyes awake to get some water, when danger alerted him to a presence, and he went to grab his sword before a thrown dagger near his hand stopped him.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you," said the feminine voice.

"Who are you? What have you done with my men?"

"Your men are fine and under a spell. I didn't want us to be interrupted. Please, have a seat. I mean you no harm."

"You just threw a dagger at me."

"Yes, only for my protection. You remain unharmed. Sit… please."

"You're her, aren't you? The woman who I captured. The woman who apparently let my son live."

"I am. My name is Mari," she said.

Maro scoffed, "You are a lousy assassin for telling me your name."

"I am telling you because I want you to know I mean you no harm and that you do not need to worry about me finishing my job."

"As if an assassin just stops being a killer," he scoffed again.

"If I wanted you dead, you would be. There would be nothing you could do about it. I have chosen to let you live, to talk to you." 

The woman, Mari, removed her hood and mask as blonde hair spilled. Not only was she telling him who she was, but revealing herself as well, trusting him he wouldn't kill her, though he was already familiar with her face.

"I am here to ask you to leave my partner and me alone."

"So, he lives?"

"He does, but he almost didn't. You nearly killed him."

"Are you not here for revenge then?" Maro asked.

"I am not. My partner and I had plans to leave the Dark Brotherhood after our assignment with the Emperor. Of course, things went wrong, and my own leader tried to have me killed for power and paranoia. Fuck her. I will miss my family, but it was my intention, with my partner, to move on with our lives and not build the Dark Brotherhood again. I am here asking you to leave us alone. We want to live our lives in peace and not spend forever looking over our shoulders."

Maro's arms crossed, defiant, determined. "I cannot. You will try to kill the Emperor again. I appreciate you not killing my son, more than you could ever know, but I also have a job to do."

"If I were anyone else, I would kill you for that. But I won't because I'm telling you my partner and I will not continue our mission. Your Emperor is safe. We just want to live our lives now, together."

It was hard to believe this assassin had any intentions of changing for the better. He struggled with the loathing, the hate he had for the Dark Brotherhood, even if his son lived. 

"If you cannot believe me and you come after me, I won't hesitate to kill you. I am not just any assassin. I am Mephala's daughter. I have a power that you could not possibly comprehend. It was Mephala who was involved in my betrayal. I loathe the creature, but she brought me life. My powers are the reason your men do not wake while we talk. My powers are the reason I was able to escape your prison with little difficulty. I hope you weren't too harsh on your jailer. It wasn’t his fault. I will ask you again, no tell you—you will leave my partner and me alone, and you need not worry about us attacking the Emperor. He is safe from us."

Mari stood to leave, replacing her mask and hood. "What say you?" she asked. "I will not ask again."

Maro gave the woman a curt nod. "Fine. You are free to live. If you ever get near my family or attempt to kill the Emperor, your life will be forfeit."

"I wouldn't expect otherwise. Please tell Gaius I say 'hello.' He is a good man. You raised him well.” Mari stood and handed Commander Maro a piece of paper. 

“What’s this?” he asked.

“Think of it as a parting gift. That piece of paper contains the name of the man who started the whole plot to assassinate the Emperor. He is the one you should be looking into because I assure you, the man will try again.”

He opened the folded piece of paper and read the name, eyes wide. “No…” How could he have been so blind? Maro looked up, but the woman was gone, not surprised.

As the assassin vanished out into the night, his men started to wake up, the spell broken. It was one of the more strange experiences in his life, but he would hold his promise to her as long as she left him and the Emperor alone. For some reason, he believed her. He believed she wouldn't hurt the Emperor, that she wanted to move on with her life.

The day warmed up, and the clouds moved on with the light breeze allowing the blue of the sky to open up. Mari lowered the hood of her cloak to enjoy Mundus's warmth as her honey hair shimmered in the light. Her face turned up towards the sky as she absorbed the feel of the heat, a smile on her face. The clearing of the storm was a reflection of her mood. It was a new day, a new life. Mari's smile broadened when Nazir wrapped an arm about her shoulder and kissed her head. 

"Are you sure we are not intruding?" he asked.

"Yes, I let him know ahead of time that we were coming. He said we were welcome."

"Does he know about Babette?"

"I figured I would leave that part out. Soren doesn't need to know she's a Vampire, and she won't hurt him. Isn't that right, Babette?"

"Don't worry about me. I will be the perfect guest," the ancient girl said. "I don't have to pretend I'm some adopted child, do I? It's so cliched."

Mari chuckled, "No, I won't torture you. You are a young friend who has no family. That is all. You can choose how much or how little to tell him."

"Are you sure he won't figure it out? I mean, you don't even eat like us," said Nazir.

"Don't worry about me," she said again. "I will hunt at night when you all are sleeping. I will be well-fed and just pretend to eat with you."

Once they got their stories straight, Mari knocked on the door to the farmhouse. It didn't take long for Soren to answer and pull Mari into a tight embrace. "My girl," he said.

Mari did not consider herself his girl, his child, but she let him feel it was so, returning his hug. Perhaps one day she would feel that, but she still had a lot to learn about Soren, to get to know him longer than the week she spent with him last time and a few letters. 

"Mara's mercy, you are so beautiful. You look more like your mother compared to the last time. Perhaps because you are smiling more. Your last visit was quite sulky. It's good to see you looking happy, child. Come in! Come in!"

"I feel happy. Soren, this is my partner, Nazir. He saved my life years ago, and I grew to love him. You know… what happened the last time I saw you. This is him."

"If you saved her, then you are most welcome here," Soren said, pulling a surprised Nazir into a hug, slamming strong hands on his back.

"And this is Babette. Though she is quite young, she's a friend. Since she has no family, she hangs out with us."

"Welcome, child. You are such a lovely little thing."

"Thank you," Babette said.

That evening, Mari took charge of making dinner, remembering a favorite meal her mother used to prepare for her while Babette excused herself to walk before dinner. In other words, the Vampire was off to hunt. 

Nazir loved watching Mari. It didn't matter what she was doing. Whatever she did, it was graceful. Mari was just cutting up carrots, but her technique was fast, accurate as she made tiny little orange disks. The smell of sauteed onions and garlic wafted through the house, looking forward to tasting whatever she made. Mari wouldn't tell him what it was. It was a surprise, she said.

"You love her," Soren said after spending time watching Nazir, who could not take his eyes off of Mari.

"I do, more than anything."

"I can't help but worry for her after what she went through the last time she was here. She was distraught."

"I know she was. I am sorry I hurt her and have done what I can to make up for it," Nazir explained, not taking offense. "I, too, am glad you care for her. I found her the day before you first met her."

"I know she wanted to kill me. I wanted to die myself until the day I met her. It was because she chose to let me live and show me who she was that turned my life around. I know she's not my daughter, but I wish she was. I love her as one."

"Is it because she looks so much like her mother?" Nazir asked.

Soren chuckled at the man's intuitiveness. "At first, yes. I felt like it would finally be my chance to redeem myself after failing the woman I love. But no, Mari looks like her mother, but she's not her mother. She had a sweet, gentle kindness about her. Mari is dark and hard, where Jodis was light and soft. I am not a fool. I know Mari has done some bad things in her life, but I'm not going to press her about them. It is hard to hide behind those eyes that have seen so much."

Nazir disagreed, then again, he never met her mother. "I see Mari as soft and light."

Soren chuckled and nodded at the man. "I'm sure you do. That is because you love her. Well, I love her too, but I have known both women, and the contrast is striking. You have that look about you too, but I already know your story."

"I can't help but feel ashamed you know it," Nazir said.

"We all have the potential for darkness, myself included. We either seek the light and better ourselves, or we embrace the darkness. I think you and Mari have chosen the light but embraced the dark before."

Nazir looked at the man, hearing his words. He had no idea Soren was so intuitive. Perhaps it was because the man had his own darkness. It took darkness to recognize it.

"Who's hungry!" yelled Mari as she brought steaming bowls to the table and fresh bread. "Mama used to make this for me. It was my favorite, not that she had the chance to cook that often. It is goat in red wine reduction sauce, smashed potatoes, and carrots."

"Smells divine, Mari," Soren said. "Smells just like how your mother used to make it."

After dinner, Mari poured everyone a glass of wine other than Babette and sat down, inhaling her cup's aroma. She felt nervous about what she was going to say, but she wanted everyone to know—her family. 

"I have an announcement I wanted to share with all of you," she said.

When she had their undivided attention, she pressed on, hands clammy, and took a long sip of wine, her only cup for the night. She took a deep breath, letting it out with a sigh. Mari had no idea how Nazir would receive the news. Better to tell him among friends. He could yell at her later.

"I am pregnant. Nazir and I are having a child, though he just now found out." Mari looked at him expectantly, unsure of what he would think or say. The last time he was expecting a child, it ended in its death along with his woman. He went on a killing rampage because of it. Since he didn't say anything, her nerves got worse. His silence turned her stomach into knots. "I… I know it's a surprise. I never, uhm, really, thought about… you know having kids, but…"

Nazir was just in shock for a moment. "I thought you had potions for that," he said but winced at his reaction. "I mean… I…"

Mari grew defensive, hoping for a different reaction. "Well, things had been a bit busy, Nazir and… Oh!"

The Redguard grabbed Mari and pulled her onto his lap, face pressed to her chest. "I'm so sorry… I am just surprised. No, I am happy. Very happy."

"Truly?" she asked, lifting up his chin to look in his eyes to see his truth.

"Truly."

"Well, this calls for a celebration!" Soren yelled out, waiting until Nazir finished emotionally reacting.

"Here, here," Babette cheered. "I am very happy for you and Nazir!"

Foreheads pressed together, Mari kissed her beloved, relief flooding her that he wasn't angry, but happy. She wasn't naive enough to know that he wasn't going to have some moments of panic. It would be understandable. 

"If… if it's OK with you, Mari, I would love to be a grandfather for the child. Only… you know, if it's OK with you," Soren said, repeating himself with his nervousness.

Mari, still on Nazir's lap and reached out her hand as Soren took it in his own, kissing it. "It would be an honor."

Soren couldn't help the overwhelming emotion that spread like fire and had him nearly weeping. Even after all this time, he wasn't sure if he deserved such love and acceptance, but he also embraced it. "Thank you."

Nazir pulled Mari onto his lap as they sat on the porch. The evening was warm, the sky bright with the aurora shimmering in its rainbow of colors. Mari curled on him and rested her head on his shoulder, inhaling his smell she loved so much. 

"Are you sure you're OK with this?" she asked.

"Yes. I have to admit the shock at first. A long list of worries passed over me. It was a fear for your life and that of our child. After what happened…"

"It's OK. I understand your fears."

Nazir opened his hand and showed Mari what he held. "I was going to give this to you even before you told me of our child growing in you. I had it made. I am not one for weddings or marriage, but the ring represents my promise. It is a promise that I will always love you and be by your side. You are blood of my blood, bone of my bone.

Mari took the ring and placed it on her finger. "It's beautiful, Nazir. I also promise to always love you, blood of my blood, bone of my bone."

The man lifted her into his arms and carried her inside. Gently he put her down on the bed they shared and undressed her. There was no rush to his actions. Nazir wanted to take his time and love every moment with Mari. Then he removed his own clothes as she watched. When he crawled into bed with her, she rolled over, trailing fingers across his tight muscles, feeling his dark skin's softness and curves. Her own heart and stomach fluttered. It wasn't their first time together, but it felt different somehow. Perhaps it was the child, his promise, or both. Their lives were uncertain, and now they were. Mari felt complete for the first time in all her young years.

There was no fanfare or elaborate movements for maximum pleasure. It was simple and done with love. Lying on top of her, holding hands above Mari's head, Nazir plunged into her. His weight, warmth, delicate kisses had her wanting more and more. Their eyes met and held as he thrust again and again. She wrapped her legs around him to pull him into her, so they were joined in sync to their movements. Outwardly it appeared to be simple lovemaking. Inwardly, their love exuded and spread through each other. 

The heat, the depth, gentle kisses on her neck left her soaring, wanting more, and he gave her all of himself. A thrust, and another, she choked back a moan as she convulsed around him. He waited patiently until he sought his own pleasure and spilled into her. Nazir was about to roll over, but she held him still, running soft, tickling fingers across his back. Mari wanted to feel his rapid heartbeat against hers as their breathing calmed. 

"I'm still afraid," he admitted into her neck.

"I know," she whispered, swirling comforting fingers on his skin.

Mari walked up the hill towards home. She just finished a job not too far away. A family had been robbed, and Mari was hired to retrieve the stolen items and return them to their rightful owners. A group of bandits was going house to house and robbing people clean of their possessions. She rarely killed anymore, not after the Dark Brotherhood, but some bandits would never see the light of day again and deserved it. Skyrim was the better for it.

The door to the house burst open, and a little girl ran out, no more than three years with dark brown curls, the color of her father's hair. Everything else was Mari's down to the eyes. The child exuded light and life, very much like Jodis, her mother. 

"Mama!" yelled the little girl.

Mari ran up her daughter, lifted her in the air, spinning her, and then brought her in for a tight hug. "I missed you, daughter."

"I missed you too, Mama! Come, come… look at what I found." She pulled Mari's hand towards the house as a giant spider crept out of it. Any other parent would have screamed in terror or tried to kill it, but not Mari. Her daughter drew arachnids to her, just like Mari. The girl also showed a propensity for the darker magic, like her mother, but she was a child of light, preferring to make light to see and heal. 

"I see Astri showed you what she brought home?" Nazir said, coming out of the house to greet Mari.

"She did. I'm assuming you are letting her keep it?"

"Yes, but outside only. It is too big for our house, as long as it is OK with you."

"Agreed."

Astri wanted to pout about not letting her keep the creature inside, but it was hard since her mother agreed she could keep the Frost Spider. Her Papa told Astri she had to wait until her Mama came home to ask.

Nazir pulled Mari holding their daughter into an embrace and kissed her. "Welcome home."

"Glad to be home."

When Mari walked in, Soren was sitting by the fire reading, waving to her. He had come to visit while she was gone. There were times when Nazir and Mari both had to work, and Soren would take over watching Astri, to help out. He adored his adopted granddaughter more than life itself. Babette lived with them for a while. Eventually, she felt like the odd person out and moved on, but she would come to visit once in a while.

"Hi, Soren. Good to see you," she said, putting down Astri and placing a peck on the older man's cheek.

After dinner, Mari leaned in the doorway to her daughter's room, watching the girl sleep, hugging her doll. She thought back to her birth. It had been a difficult one, and Nazir had been beside himself. He was nearly over the edge with worry and stress. His nightmares returned once more as Astri neared her birth. 

The labor was long, and Astri struggled to come out, but come out she did, and the girl was healthy. Babette didn't stay for the birth, afraid of all the blood and what it would do for her hunger. The Vampire didn't trust herself around the baby, but she left Mari some excellent healing tonics since she was terrible at restoration magic. 

Nazir and Mari named her Astri for her beautiful light and goodness. It meant 'fair' and 'divinely beautiful,' which Astri was. The girl was their beacon in a dark world. 

There was always that lingering fear that Mephala would interfere with Astri's life, but if she did, Mari would know it and do what she could to prevent the Princes' meddling. She hoped that the last time she saw Mephala, it would be enough to keep the creature out of her life.

She could hear Nazir coming over to her and felt his arm wrapping around her, disrupting her worries. His kiss to her temple left her smiling. "I never get over how beautiful she is," he said.

"Me neither. I can't stop looking at our little girl."

"She's destined for great things, Mari. I can feel it."

Mari turned to face him, her lover, her partner, her soulmate. Wrapping arms about his neck, she pulled him in for a kiss. "I feel it too."


End file.
